A place to discuss career options, to ask questions and give advice!
Advice
I am upper management in nightlife/live entertainment in a large live events venue. I have been in this industry for 10+ years, it’s given me the opportunity to move to a handful of new cities and hear the phrase, “man, that must be a cool job” when conversing with strangers because, idk, I guess famous people?
It hit me last night, while I was on my 10th hour of the day on site and I just started crying uncontrollably in my office that I am beyond burnt out. Physically and mentally, and well aware that I’m underpaid—it’s common and accepted in this industry because we’re supposed to be ‘grateful’ for what we do. Well, I’m not grateful.
Personally, I’d love to have flexibility in my life. Not work 60+ hours a week. Not have every single weekend wasted, so that I can enjoy them with my friends and family. Not have a thousand things to worry about or constant fires to put out. The ability to leave work at the office and not have to think about it at home. The ability to have a night off and not have to answer 20 phone calls, answer 30 emails or continue to be plugged in. I just want to feel the tension in my jaw release.
A lot of different skills go into what I do. People management of course, large teams. Lots of financial, lots of time management, ordering, P&L, clients, vendors, millions of dollars in revenue…but, I can’t even imagine how or what my skills transfer to. I’ve never done anything else. Never worked in another industry. I started off as a bartender in this world over 14 years ago.
I’ve dabbled in freelance writing during the pandemic, and had a few contract jobs but not enough to build a writing resume. But that’s my calm place. My dream job would be a hybrid situation, that involves writing or doing something that actually matters in the community for greater good. I like working alone, with small teams and handling projects. I’m an introvert at heart—I just want peace and quiet. I have no formal degree - although, my current job requires a bachelors, I am here by life experience.
I wonder if it’s almost worth it just to be a bartender somewhere. Financially, an unstable choice but the thought of having zero responsibility, some control over my own life again makes me want to ditch it all.
Not sure what advice I’m looking for but curious to hear.
Sort by:
Best
Open comment sort options
Best
Top
New
Controversial
Old
Q&A
Just do a bad job. Leave early. Take care of yourself. If a job doesn’t pay enough, give them that much worth of work. I bet your bosses will hardly notice because they have their heads so far up their own asses. A lot of us think that the world won’t spin with out them.
I feel like I’m already at that level, not nearly applying myself as much as I used to.
Okay it’s time to start exploring new roles within your skill set before you go back to bartending. Bartending is fine, but you’re just going to be in this same position in a year or 2. Where do you think your skill set could take you? Have you worked on your resume? Can you take a week off?
I do have a current up to date resume. I could easily find a comparable situation, running something equate to what I do now. Some places have even reached out to me via job boards. But, I think I am at this point in my life where I am craving “normality”, which makes me feel lost.
That much time off in my current world is only allowed when the ‘business allows’, so, in about 2 months.
Apply for 2 jobs a day. That’s all you have to do. You don’t have to take the jobs, you don’t even have to interview. Just start applying. Start working on your resume, pass it to friends and have them give it a once over. You have nothing to lose, you’re in a perfect position to change.
With your experience in nightlife and entertainment, you've got a lot to offer, whether it's in writing or making a difference in your community. Don't underestimate your bartending background, it's all about finding what brings you joy and control. Take your time exploring your options and don't be afraid to make a change for the better. It's not shameful to do a 180 with what you do. Personally, I used Career fitter to narrow down my options and figure out what I actually want to do.
Thank you! And I will check Career Fitter!
the paid version was $20 and worth it. It organizes a lot of career info.conveniently.
Yeah like u/phoneacct696969 says, your job is shitty. Take a personality assessment to match you with possible career paths. The variety of skills and experiences you've built up would travel well and be looked upon very favorably in a variety of other fields.
Appreciate it.
It’s absolutely worth going back to be a bartender. Just because you took this higher level role for a bit doesn’t mean you have to stay in it. Life is too short! I bet you are a great bartender and might find that the difference in money isn’t that much in exchange for your time.
Thanks!
Yeah, I hear that - always turned on, can’t turn off. Plus, if you take pride in your work it can be painful to see your quality slipping during burnout.
You have a ton of transferable skills, but this situation isn’t unique to your industry. Hopefully you have some savings where you have the room to decompress before looking for another job.
Your tendencies seem like a match for owning your own small business or consulting. With all your connections, is there a niche that you could provide a service? It’s hard to think clearly on these things when you’ve got 1000 things on your plate.
A friend told me one time that when you’re burning out, you’re no good to yourself or your employer, so self-care is priority. Some separation or vacation may help in the short-term, but ultimately you need a situation where you can work without overwhelm.
I quit my job due to burnout and thought I’d go back into the industry in a couple of months. I discovered I needed more time, so I started doing flexible side hustle work. Now over a year later, I’m not sure if I want to go back into that industry. I’m thinking more about how I can be self-employed.
Good luck!
I appreciate this!
I’ve often thought about what I would do if I ran my own small business, but like you said, clarity is hard. Hoping to take a vacation this summer, which I’m sure I’ll be reamed out over the amount of time I plan for it to be—that right there may be the end of my current career!
Can I ask what you’re doing for side hustles? I don’t have a vehicle since I live in an urban area, most people say Uber, etc.
Enjoy your vacation!
I am doing some Uber, but just a little on the weekends. I don’t really care for it, but it’s pretty reliable. My other side hustle is tutoring math and science, which I enjoy and feel good about. My long-term vision is setting up consulting gigs in biotech and doing some writing. I’m open to taking a position in my industry and a few opportunities have come up, but I’m super picky now and don’t want to jeopardize my well-being.
with bartending, you’ve got an advantage because you can pick something up quick if needed. Good luck!
I ran a nightclub for about 7 years and quit for a boring office job. Do not regret my decision at all. I didn’t understand this at the time but I only did it for so long because of the exterior validation that comes from that industry.
I completely get what you mean. I look back at myself even a few years ago when I was in a very unhealthy mindset in the industry. Everyone loves to brag about how horrible their work/life balance is. What’s the point? I’m glad I’ve woken up, now it’s time to change. I’m happy that you’re satisfied with your change!
Listen to your heart
Bar restaurant manager? Executive at a company that runs a bunch of them? Manager at a large bar restaurant that has a focus on live music. Something like Billy Bobs in dfw
BASICALLY you just said,,
I made a long post about nothing at all..