Wise Old Man
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Dionysius, also known as the Wise Old Man is found on the ground floor[UK]1st floor[US] in a house just north of the Draynor bank. Nicknamed Dissy by people such as Zenevivia, Xenia and Elsie, he is a legendary and very powerful magician of Saradomin and former adventurer, currently residing in Draynor Village. Dionysius, under his judicious alias, is infamous for both the Draynor Bank Robbery as well as the Wizards' Tower Robbery, the latter of which he carried out with his girlfriend Zenevivia.
Although he currently claims to be a retired adventurer, Dionysius used to be a famous hero in his youth, saving countless lives and fighting back the dark forces of Gielinor. A summary of some of his travels, feats and other several significant events in his life are detailed in Herman's book.
He is amongst the most commonly re-occurring characters in RuneScape, playing pivotal roles in several quests. He is also a community hit, frequently recurring in the Postbag from the Hedge with an exclusive, special section at the end of each Postbag known as Wise old tips.
The Quest Cape is available from him, for a fee, to players who have completed all the quests. He is one of only four characters who do not wear the Cape of Accomplishment that they sell (the others being Orla Fairweather, who is unable to do so, Thok, who merely guards it, and Minerva, who wears cape of legends).
Players doing Treasure Trail clues are sometimes directed to him with the anagram "Winsome Lad".
He was involved in the Runefest 2017 chip hunt. The R.U.N.E.F.E.S.T. penguins were spying on him, and he must be warned to receive a chip.
History[edit | edit source]
Early life[edit | edit source]
Dionysius was born in the city of Varrock, where he was educated and where he gained fervour in Saradomin's path. During his time there, he performed numerous deeds that were considered bold and inspirational by the youth of the time; according to Elsie, one of his more memorable actions was painting "Saradomin Pwns" on the Zamorakian temple in the southern part of the town.
After turning 15, the age at which his peers would look to get employed, he turned down a prestigious offer to study amongst the priests of Entrana, and decided to travel instead. So he set out, voyaging across far-off lands and civilisations in Gielinor, assisting the inhabitants in their endeavours.
Most of his adventures have not been told in great detail, although one of the first regions he visited was the mines in and around Keldagrim, where some of the elder dwarves still remember his aid in their war against a rogue tribe of trolls that threatened to destroy the city. Today, the trolls still wander in the Keldagrim entrance tunnel but are unable to enter the city.
Shortly after leaving the dwarves, he journeyed into the eastern mountains, where a now-disbanded mountain tribe spoke of an "invincible warrior who wielded a powerful staff", aiding them in repelling some creatures from their camp.
Moving on from the mountain tribes, the Wise Old Man took a trip to Karamja, where he taught the natives the use of certain herbs that would aid them in combat. He also ventured into Brimhaven Dungeon, which few people at the time dared to enter and even advised the locals to charge any adventurer who wished to enter the dungeon, leading Saniboch to charge a fee of 875 coins to every venturing adventurer.
According to Xenia, along with herself and Radimus Erkle, the Grand Vizier of the Legends' Guild, Dionysius had once adventured to Karamja together in the hopes of mapping the Kharazi Jungle. They managed to make the first partial map of the area, but then the Jogre Wars began and they were unable to complete it.
Next, he then travelled into the Kharidian Desert, where he lived amongst the Bedabin for some time. He toured across many of the desert cities, including the deep-seated Menaphos and Sophanem. He is also said to have studied the mysterious pyramid to the south of the Bandit Camp, although not speaking of what he discovered in the pyramid, which troubles him to this day. The Wise Old Man is known to have fought the Kalphite Queen during that time. In one desert adventure, he even rescued Larry from an avalanche.
At some point before he retired, the Wise Old Man was also trained by Lozar, one of the wizards who had escaped Elvarg's destruction of the Crandor city and secretly hidden one of the pieces to the Crandor map with herself.
Having had seen the world during these uncounted adventures, Dionysius travelled back to Entrana to complete his studies. Even on Entrana he found excitement, when he ventured into the demon-infested dungeon beneath it; at one point, he was offered admittance to the Temple Knights. He is also the author of Magicks Most Destructive, of which very few copies survive today, and only fragments of it remain in the Temple Knight library. There is a copy in the chemist's house in Rimmington, but it is currently unreadable.
A few years and many more adventures later, he finally decided to retire and settle down in Draynor Village across from the bank.
The dark side[edit | edit source]
After completing his adventures, Dionysius began to feel bitter that he had not been adequately "rewarded" for his deeds, as he was forced to live in relative squalor. He thought that it was within his right, therefore, to reward himself, and uses this as justification for his crimes. After Zenevivia stole his player-owned house, he was left broke and headed to Draynor Village.
His most notorious act was the robbing of the local bank, killing several people in the process. A player can watch the robbery's recording by speaking to the bank guard outside the bank - free for the first view, and a fee of 50 coins for every next consecutive watch. One of these unfortunate victims, an NPC named Elfinlocks, dropped a blue partyhat, which the Wise Old Man claimed for himself due to its rarity and visual appeal. This in turn caused him to become unusually addicted to hats and masks.
His telescope, which pointed to the bank prior to the robbery, is currently pointing towards the Wizards' Tower; his strange book also notes that he is running short on runes and that the wizards to the south have plenty, yet supply him with none. Dionysius has grown desperate to attain runes even to the point of taking them directly from players who asks him to examine their runestones. In Postbag 12[1], the Wise Old Man confirms, after defending his morally dubious recent actions, that he is indeed planning an assault there, despite his denials to players, and that the reason for doing so is that he is "short of runes these days" and that an excursion to the Tower could "solve my problem permanently." Yet, despite all his power and skill, he also admits to being reluctant to launch the attack, for "the powers of Wizard Traiborn are not to be underestimated" and his plans are "not yet finalised." Further evidence pointing to his planned attack lies in his own words of, "All good things come to those who wait, currently I'm interested in...local...concerns." when a suggestion and plan for him to assault and scour the elven city of Prifddinas was sent to him.
| “ | In the distant past, when I travelled the world solving people's problems and saving those in distress just as you do today, I held the hope that my efforts would be appreciated and met with appropriate gratitude. But what did I get? When I grew old and the time came for me to retire, I found myself forced into this poxy shack in Draynor Village, neighboured by a pigment-obsessed hag and a 'navigator' whose prowess at knitting exceeds his ability to steer a boat. Not to mention the constant flow of unashamed thieves through the village market! (The hideous harpy who sits gawking through my window will gladly show you a picture of the house as it was when I first came here.) My meek and placid nature notwithstanding, I realised that if I did not take my reward for myself, I would receive nothing at all. So I took up my trusty staff and headed for the bank. I am sure you would be likewise frustrated beyond belief if you were to dedicate a lifetime's effort to the service of others and receive no reward. | ” |
| — Wise Old Man [1] | ||
The Temple Knights, realising how dangerous he is, have been monitoring him and have labelled him as an "ultraviolet archangel" threat. The Bank of Gielinor, the guards of Draynor Village, and many of the locals are also watching him closely, though he does not seem to be worried about this. Despite this and obvious proof of his crimes, the authorities of Misthalin have, as of yet, made no attempt to bring him to justice, acknowledging and fearing his prowess.
Dionysius appears none too fond of the organisation known as H.A.M., despite it mainly consisting of Saradominists like himself, calling them "ridiculously attired xenophobes", and his liking of them is even lessened still by his suspicion that the creature under his bed is "a subterranean creature forced out of its natural habitat".
The ring of charos[edit | edit source]
The adventurer, who stumbled into Ellamaria at Varrock Castle, was ordered to assist in the construction of a garden for King Roald. Dionysius was paid a visit by the adventurer, who was surprised to learn that they were in Ellamaria's service. He explained some of her past to them, before noticing the ring of charos in their possession. Recalling Charos' past, he gave them a small test to see if they were worthy of using its full potential. They passed, and he imbued the ring, allowing it to be more effective.
Vision[edit | edit source]
Dionysius appeared as a vision inside the Sacred Forge in Camdozaal, telling the adventurer that in order to use the shield of Arrav's hidden powers, it had to be used by a descendant of one of the original Varrock Elders.
Another adventure[edit | edit source]
Dionysius' adventures were well known amongst the people of Gielinor. Sea trolls began attacking Piscatoris Fishing Colony owned by Herman Caranos. The adventurer offered their assistance, though Herman believed that Dionysius would prove valuable in defending the colony, after recalling his legendary adventures, despite the recent bank robbery he had committed. Dionysius decided to assist the colony as his "swan song", though he requested the adventurer bring him some runes as his stockpile was running low. Once the runes were given to him, Dionysius made his way to the fishing colony, where he assisted in taking out several trolls.
Upon meeting with Herman, both Herman and Dionysius requested the adventurer bring them an army. Dionysius recommended Wizard Frumscone's zombies, but when asked, Frumscone refused to loan his zombies, as everyone would keep asking him. Frumscone then sent them to the necromancer Malignius Mortifer, who procured them a skeletal army. Dionysius believed the adventurer had gone crazy after being informed the army was in the pot, and decided not to send anyone to him ever again after suspecting necromancy.
With the army ready, Dionysius and the adventurer fought the sea trolls. He took down a powerful general, before a powerful attack "knocked" him out. The adventurer was forced to deal with the Sea Troll Queen, but were able to kill it. Much to the adventurer's dismay, he did not give them his blue partyhat.
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Zenevivia's return[edit | edit source]
After helping Mabel, Zenevivia was disgusted with their assistance and challenged both the adventurer and Dionysius so she could defeat the two of them in battle. The adventurer returned to Dionysius, who recalled his memories with her fondly, much to the adventurer's outrage. He then stated that he had a house in Rimmington, only for Zenevivia to lock him out one day.
When they arrived at the Rimmington house portal, Dionysius attempted to enter, only to realise that Zenevivia had disconnected the teleport matrix. Although he could have reclaimed his house before, he refused to do so, preferring his house in Draynor more. He requested that they bring him a chisel, before handing them some teleport to house tablets, explaining how to chip the tabs to modify the teleport destination.
Upon arriving at his former house, Dionysius was surprised she had redecorated it, and that the only way they could get in was through the dungeon. They were quickly forced back out after discovering traps that would harm them, and Dionysius told them that they would need to create a mechanical dummy to set the traps off prematurely. Once all the traps were taken out, the two entered the dungeon and dispatched the monsters inside before confronting Zenevivia.
Dionysius told the adventurer to not kill her, as Zenevivia had thought that he was still an adventurer, and believed that he would be able to win her again after explaining the bank robbery and offering to attack the Wizard's Tower together, despite the adventurer's reservations. The pair defeated Zenevivia, and Dionysius explained to her about his recent actions; much to his delight, she agreed to restart their relationship.
The two then set out to attack the Wizard's Tower, which was successful until Wizard Traiborn bought back a thingummywut, which launched numerous earth surge spells at the pair, forcing them to retreat. He then decided to give up his hobby of robbing, content with having Zenevivia back.
Dionysius and Zenevivia then offered the adventurer several rewards, with Dionysius rewarding them with the ability to chip more locations, along with other rewards.
Religion[edit | edit source]
Dionysius, during his early days in Varrock, regularly attended the local Saradominist chapel and started following Saradomin's teachings.
When asked about Zaros, the Menaphite Pantheon, or Armadyl, he denies their existence, though from his frantic responses it appears that he has indeed heard of them and their vast power. Apparently, he is a Saradominist who admittedly only believes in the three major gods: Saradomin, Guthix, and Zamorak.
Leisure[edit | edit source]
Despite his bitterness, Dionysius in old age still does enjoy the occasional trip to foreign lands.
Of his most recent trips, he has visited areas such as the Trollweiss Mountain - seen sledding during the now discontinued Gnomecopter Tours - and Oo'glog, to enjoy the new spa facilities and local hospitality.
Dionysius appears to take much joy in drinking. He has also stated in Postbag 28[2] that he would like to get into Prifddinas.
When dig sites all over Gielinor began popping up, Dionysius set up notices in the Archaeology Guild that he would be collecting magical items, masks and hats, offering various rewards in return for them.
Strengths[edit | edit source]
Knowledge and skills[edit | edit source]
During his adventures, the Wise Old Man gained a deep understanding of the world, learning of its histories and nature. What he learned, though, he often will not share openly, and he seems to possess historical knowledge that, in the wrong hands, could be deadly.
An example of this is his comprehension of teleportation, and being aware of the Abyss and its role in the teleportation process. He is capable of teleporting to virtually any destination rather than using the simple channels utilised by most teleporters, which suggests that he might be able to resist the effects of teleblocking, as Mr. Mordaut mentions that besides the locations players can teleport to, all other locations are teleblocked.
The Wise Old Man is incredibly strong-willed, apparent by his immunity to the effects of the activated ring of charos, a feat only matched by the vampyres.
Dionysius has also displayed a fluent understanding of multiple languages, ranging from tribal Karamjan to the ancient dwarvish tongue[source needed]. Though he most often speaks common tongue, he often mixes Infernal into his speech, such as Vini; volui; mihi est (I came; I wanted; it's mine), which is a reference to the famous Roman phrase Veni, Vidi, Vici (I came, I saw, I conquered).
Combat[edit | edit source]
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The Wise Old Man's most distinguished talent is his mastery over magic, which he has honed over the years, learning from countless sources. His most deadly offensive ability, though, is a spell of unknown nature that when used, instantly incinerates the flesh, muscle, and organs of the victim. This spell, apart from being extremely lethal, is also capable of destroying brick walls and virtually any other obstacle in its way. However, he refrains from using the spell on any occasion. This was explained due to a lack of skill in his earlier years, and a lack of runes after the bank robbery.
Although he has a plethora of magical weapons at his disposal, the Wise Old Man has openly displayed very few of them. He has shown his abilities extend beyond simple combat, capable of using telekinetic grab and other basic spells with ease. He has also delved deep into the art of mental magic, and can push those attempting to scry into his mind away while simultaneously dealing a powerful counter-attack.
As an example, when the NPC Contact spell is set to "Random NPC", it may sometimes yield a conversation with the Wise Old Man. When contacted, though, he will force them out of his mind, stating "Keep your foreign Magicks out of my head!" His calling of the Lunar spell thus may imply that he himself has garnered minimal knowledge of the mystic lore in the Lunar spellbook. The Wise Old Man, upon breaking the Lunar spell, will then direct a Fire Wave from afar at the player, whose location he can apparently pinpoint, across vast distances and even into other dimensions. He also denies the very existence of Zaros's Ancient Magicks, calling the adventurer a "foul trickster" and their words "foolishness" should one mention them to him; however, Zenevivia, one whom Dionysius knew well in his earlier days, uses spells from the Ancient Magicks. He has also displayed a knack for alchemy and other strange divisions of magic, as is evident in his cryptic writings.
Being adept in teleportation and its process, he implements teleportation liberally in combat, dazing his opponents by teleporting all around them and launching attacks from all sides, further proving his abilities, because Mr. Mordaut claims that teleporting a short distance away is harder than teleporting long distances.
Even at his old age, Dionysius is extremely adept at hand-to-hand combat, easily capable of defeating the strongest of foes. His skill in using basic weaponry is unrivalled, and he has proven himself able to defeat even armed foes using only a staff. He also apparently possesses a lethal kick, which has been shown capable of shattering even the shell of the Kalphite Queen. According to Dionysius, he is even now capable of wrestling crocodiles on the banks of the River Elid.
Archaeology collections[edit | edit source]
The Wise Old Man is a collector asking for hats/masks and magical artefacts, in return for several rewards. All artefacts donated to collectors must be unnoted.
Wise Am the Music Man[edit | edit source]
Archaeology level: 91
One-time reward: Koschei's needle
Repeating reward: 4024 chronotes
Hat Hoarder[edit | edit source]
Archaeology level: 116
One-time reward: N/A
Repeating reward: 5995 chronotes
Hat Problem[edit | edit source]
Archaeology level: 114
One-time reward: N/A
Repeating reward: 6775 chronotes
Magic Man[edit | edit source]
Archaeology level: 118
One-time reward: N/A
Repeating reward: 8600 chronotes
Knowledge is Power[edit | edit source]
Archaeology level: 119
One-time reward: Amascut's Enchanted Gem
Repeating reward: 5584 chronotes
20th Anniversary celebrations[edit | edit source]
Wise Old Man was present throughout the 20th Anniversary celebrations. During the Grand Party, held at the Lumbridge Crater from 4 January 2021 to 1 February 2021 he could be talked to to claim the 20th Anniversary Outfit and the 20th Anniversary cape cosmetic overrides. During the Golden Partyhat Hunt event, active from 22 November 2021 to 3 January 2022, he could be found near the Grand Exchange entrance in Varrock as a host of the activity. When spoken to, he gives the players one of the eight golden partyhat shards and allows them to combine them into a golden partyhat or to reclaim lost shards.
Golden Cape Hunt[edit | edit source]
Similarly to the Golden Partyhat Hunt, Wise Old Man featured in the Golden Cape Hunt, allowing the players to combine eight golden cape shards into a golden cape.
Tasks[edit | edit source]
In members' worlds, the player is able to do favours for the Wise Old Man, such as getting him swords or bars, or delivering notes, for which he hands out moderate rewards. Most of the time the reward is a blessing, which increases the player's Prayer experience, or a small amount of runes, seeds, herbs or coins. One of these tasks required the player to fight a monster under his bed, for which he will reward the player with some Constitution experience.
Along with this, among the possible jobs the Wise Old Man will assign a player, one of them includes delivering a letter to one of the following:
- Oracle, on Ice Mountain
- Reldo, librarian of Varrock Palace library
- Abbot Langley of the Monastery
- High Priest of Entrana
- Thurgo, south of Port Sarim
This indicates that the Wise Old Man knows these famous figures throughout Gielinor, and that they, to some extent, know him. He corresponds with them somewhat frequently.
Item cleanup[edit | edit source]
The Wise Old Man can search a player's bank or backpack for unneeded quest items. He can also examine any item you give him; if examining certain runes, he will say they are useful and instantly take a few of them.
Home[edit | edit source]
He has a few unique books on his bookshelf which the player can read. One, the book on chickens, is about the legend of the Evil Chicken, and the strange book mentioned already. However, if you use any of his books on him, he will take them back from you. He also has numerous tinderboxes in his house. His house also includes a model aeroplane and very rare, gold-trimmed Saradomin armour, which, according to his strange book, he had trimmed with some of his stolen money.
Stock[edit | edit source]
| Item | Number in stock | Price sold at | Price bought at | GE price | Resale value | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
 | Quest Cape | ∞ | 99,000 | Not bought | N/A | N/A |
 | Quest Cape hood | ∞ | 99,000 | Not bought | 1 | ∞ (−98,999) |
Dialogue[edit | edit source]
Works[edit | edit source]
Gallery[edit | edit source]
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Dionysius breaking into the bank
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Dionysius telegrabbing his new blue partyhat
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Dionysius destroying the camera, ending the recording
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A player looking through Dionysius's telescope
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Wise Old Man during the Golden partyhat Hunt
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Wise Old Man miniature from RuneScape Kingdoms
Graphical updates[edit | edit source]
Update history[edit | edit source]
- update 19 February 2024 (Update):
- Moved the Wise Old Man's 'Talk about Archaeology', 'Talk about something else' opening confirmation to an option in his dialogue tree.
- patch 13 July 2020 (Update):
- It is now possible to access the Wise Old Man's Archaeology Collection even while he's gallivanting about in various quests.
- patch 19 March 2018 (Update):
- The examines for the telescope on 1st floor[UK]2nd floor[US] floor in the Wise Old Man's house in Draynor Village has been updated as part of the hidden achievement A Brief History of Telescopes. Patch note: "Updated some telescope examines."
- patch 23 October 2017 (Update):
- The Wise Old Man will no longer lie about 'storing' burnt meat when, in fact, he is throwing it away.
- patch 17 October 2016 (Update):
- The Wise Old Man can now remove books obtained from the River of Blood quest.
- patch 18 July 2016 (Update):
- The Wise Old Man now checks the bank for all outfits that can be reclaimed from Diango when searching for junk.
- ninja 4 April 2016 (Update):
- The Wise Old Man is now able to help clear out more quest items that are no longer useful from the players bank and inventory.
- ninja 9 June 2014 (Update):
- The Wise Old Man is now able to help clear out more unwanted items from player’s banks and inventories.
- patch 17 March 2014 (Update):
- The old level up interface has been removed from the Wise Old Man's tasks.
- patch 17 June 2013 (Update):
- Several stretching issues on NPCs during the Wise Old Man's bank robbery have been fixed.
- patch 23 August 2011 (Update):
- The Wise Old Man no longer refers to Kayle's sling as being a bow.
- patch 1 September 2010 (Update):
- The Wise Old Man's chathead should display correctly during any quest he's involved in.
- patch 25 May 2010 (Update):
- The Wise Old Man can now look at items you may have from The Blood Pact.
Trivia[edit | edit source]
- His name is possibly a reference to Dionysus, the Greek god of wine, or it may refer to Dionysius, a tyrant from the Greek ancient world.
- His nickname "Dissy" may be a reference to Odysseus, a famous Greek adventurer and logician.
- The poster of the Wise Old Man in the 28th issue of the Postbag from the Hedge is a reference to the British war posters of Lord Kitchener in the First World War.
- The Wise Old Man briefly appeared at the Clan Wars minigame (on 29 September 2008). He took it upon himself to warn players that gravestones had been removed from the Dangerous Clan Wars portal, meaning they will lose items upon death.
- The Wise Old Man seems to be very afraid of Revenants, as when talking to him about the Wilderness he has a scared chathead when he mentions them.
- He makes an appearance in the "Vote NO, RuneScape Free Trade & the Wilderness" and "Vote YES, RuneScape Free Trade & the Wilderness" YouTube videos.
- The Cryptic Clue Fest IV Day 4 Clue jokingly claims that Dionysius is really a 24 year old man using magic to appear old, and that his favourite item is a cowhide, due to being nostalgic for the "good old days".
- Dionysius, according to the ever-watchful Miss Schism, once possessed "a scruffy old black thing", but after killing Elfinlocks, obtained a blue partyhat.
- The gold trimmed Saradomin armour he paid to trim is a reference is the popular scam in which players would pay money to have their armour trimmed.
- For a short period of time after the graphic update at the wizards tower, looking through the telescope on the 1st floor[UK]2nd floor[US] of the Wise Old Man's house froze your computer and logged you out. This glitch was soon fixed and adapted to fit the new wizard tower.
- After completing The Chosen Commander, Zanik will occasionally appear in the Wise Old Man's house to ask him about his adventure.
- On about 27 March 2007, there was a glitch at the Catherby grappling tree that resulted in some players getting stuck in the water between the island and the mainland. Mod Ash put a copy of the Wise Old Man on the Catherby shore that would teleport the stranded players out of the water.
- In Zemouregal's castle in New Varrock, there is a stuffed Wise Old Man, with the examine text "Turns out that his swan song involved lots of cotton wool and taxidermy needles." This is further supported by the fact Zemouregal states that he killed the Wise Old Man by exploding his insides.
- It can be observed that the Wise Old Man has 30,000 life points during the Zenevivia fight in the Dominion Tower when a familiar's attack option targets him.
References[edit | edit source]
| Part 1 of the Wise Old Man quest series | |
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| A subquest of Recipe for Disaster | |
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| Part 12 of the Mahjarrat Mysteries quest series | |||||||
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| A subquest of Once Upon a Time in Gielinor | |
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