One trip is all you ever need. Watch to see if Matt is up to the challenge.
Transcript[]
Matt: The first time grocery shopping as a couple. Big milestone in a relationship.
Mallory: Oh yeah? Well, does my big strong man want to help me carry all these groceries inside? It's probably going to take a few trips.
Matt: I don't do more than one trip.
Mallory: No?
Matt: No. Load me up. Proceed.
Mallory: Okay. Let me just...
Matt: Ta-da!
Mallory: Wow! Yes, not bad. There is still a lot in here, though.
Matt: Is there? Well, put that one around my neck.
Mallory: Matt, I don't...
Matt: Come on, it will be fine.
Mallory: Okay...
Matt: Ow. That is incredibly heavy.
Mallory: It's a turkey.
Matt: Yes, I have a very good view of it.
Mallory: Sorry, this is crazy.
Matt: No! Do not touch the turkey!
Mallory: But Matt...
Matt: Just put something on the other side of my neck to balance it.
Mallory: Like that?
Matt: Oh! It's in my mouth.
Mallory: Okay.
Matt: Yes. That is good. What is it?
Mallory: It's the other turkey.
Matt: It's perfectly balanced. Well done, Mallory. What else do we have?
Mallory: Nothing.
Matt: You're lying, aren't you?
Mallory: Can we please just go back inside and then come...
Matt: No, we are so close! We can do this! What else is there?
Mallory: Pudding cups.
Matt: Pockets.
Matt: Place that under my chin. Hm. Okay, this fruit should never touch human skin. We should probably hurry, I think one of the pudding cups popped open.
Mallory: You almost did it.
Matt: What? There's more?
Mallory: Forgot the milk.
Matt: Milk! No! So close! So close!
Matt: Mal, do you see that hook on the ground?
Mallory: This? Why is there a hook on the ground?
Matt: Jam it into my shoulder.
Mallory: What?
Matt: Do it!
Mallory: No
Matt: One, two...
Mallory: I don't want to do this!
Matt: Three!
Mallory: Ah!
Matt: Ah! Yes! Now, put the milk on the hook.
Matt: At last, we can now bring in the groceries.
Mallory: I am impressed, but I'm also noticeably less attracted to you.
Matt: That's fair. Which way to the elevator?
Mallory: Elevator?
Matt: No. No, no, no.
Trivia[]
- This sketch was uploaded on the day the episode aired on BYUtv.
- This is the fifth sketch of Season 2 Episode 3, and the twentieth sketch of Season 2.
- The working title of this sketch was simply "Grocery Bag".
- This sketch explicitly mentions Mattory as a couple.
- This is the second sketch of Season 2 Episode 3, after Rock, Paper, Scissors, not to be filmed in the studio.
| Season 2 Episode 3 | ||
|---|---|---|
| ~ Williamson Dishwasher (transcript) ~ ~ Rock, Paper, Scissors (transcript) ~ ~ Poker Face (transcript) ~ ~ Ann "The Librarian" Withers (transcript) ~ ~ Grocery Bag Challenge (transcript) ~ ~ Background Check (transcript) ~ ~ Just Jeremy: How To Mustache (transcript) ~ ~ Awkward Avoidance Viking: Drive-By (transcript) ~ ~ Protecting the Innocent (transcript) ~ | ||