r/OkCupid

I understand that the free experience is supposed to "motivate" me to spend money, but if the window into the walled garden looks like this... are they even trying?

As the title says.

I don't use premium, and really don't want to, but when I look at my intros the one that comes up is from a deleted profile, and I'm not able to accept or decline...obviously. I've tried blocking it, but that doesn't do anything because the account doesn't exist.

Is there any way to get rid of it so I can see my other intros, or am I just screwed?

I’m a guy, I don’t get matches on dating apps unless I pay for their premium feature and/or use super likes (that I bought). However, I do well enough when i bring those premium features into play. It drives me nuts that I have to spend money….… but anyways, what is okcupid like now?

Dating with intention.

I enjoy witty banter.

I see so many posts from people talking about how much they miss how dating apps were back in 2009. So roughly 7 months ago I put my head down and learned how to code.

At first the app didn’t pass app review but I kept improving and polishing it until it finally passed!

That’s why today I’m super excited to present to you Closr: Dating App For Marriage. As the title says, Closr is designed to help you get closer to your marriage goals by encouraging deep connections.

Here’s how it works:

1. Core Values: First the app asks a few deep questions to understand what you value in a relationship.

2. Advanced Filtering: Then it uses your core values to filter out people who don’t have the same values.

3. Instant Connection: No need to match again. Start bonding immediately with your own message or your choice of 50 icebreakers.

4. AI Date Ideas: After AI gives you the Green Light, go on your first date with date ideas catered to your shared interests!

And if you’re worried about safety, Closr uses strict guidelines, photo analysis, natural language processing, and behavioral analysis to protect the community. Incognito Mode is also available if you want to hide for a bit!

The app is completely free with no ads and I don’t sell your data so no pressure whatsoever, try it out and let me know what you think.

Full disclaimer when this app gets big in a few months I will have to monetize it to cover AI and server costs and remove any bots that slipped through. As a solo dev with no shareholders I can and will keep it as affordable as possible.

If you have any feedback or opinions, please let me know. If you want the Google version let me know and I’ll make it for you.

Thanks for reading! Together let’s make dating apps great again.

WTF....Really, this is corporate suicide by a thousand cuts.

There was no rationale for getting rid of essay photos, other than to degrade the site, I see this as no different.

The ability to rank questions appears to be gone now too. It's infuriating.

I presume this is happening to everyone else as well? I am a premium subscriber so I should have my functionality "maxxed" out.

Hey, very new here, so, I'm kinda desperate for affection and just joined OkCupid a few days ago under the advice of my sibling who said it's way less toxic than Tinder (m'kay, both look like they don't give a fuck about yoy but fine)

Within that time, I have used maybe 3 Superlikes. The first time by accident a few minutes after I joined because god dammit, this swiping mechanic is terrible, I just want to open the person's profile, not be a creep, so I tried to backtrack with the "undo" arrow, if that does anything.

But yesterday and this morning, I voluntairly used 2 Super Likes and got two immediate matches. I'm talking instant. Two times in a row, an instant match, when the rest of the time, I was swiping right into the void. When I look, it says "You matched from a Super Like". What ?? Did the Super Like... FORCE a match ? Did it automatically make one ?? I'm not paying exorbent prices to know if 28 of my 30 likes live in Asia or near me, so I can't tell if they liked me first.

So, did the Super Likes cause the match ? Can they do that ? Have I just creeped out two women into a match they don't want because of some bullshit cheat option ?? I'm terrified !!

(asking as someone inexperienced in love)

I live in Prague and downloaded the app couple of days ago. I'm an average looking guy (28M) hence i'm pretty surprised that i recieved 32 likes within few days. Is anyone experience that? There are a lot of bots on okCupid?

I am new on okcupid they are 3 weeks now but I haven't got an intros or messages though I am getting likes and of which I didn't pay for the app. Can I have any doubts while using the app or?

Whitney Wolfe Herd, CEO of Bumble, envisions a future where AI takes the lead in dating by handling initial interactions and even going on dates on behalf of users. This AI concierge would sift through potential matches, engage in conversation, and recommend the most compatible individuals for face-to-face meetings, thereby streamlining the dating process. By leveraging artificial intelligence, Bumble aims to create a safer and more equitable digital platform while empowering users, particularly women, to navigate the complexities of modern dating with confidence. Despite concerns about the ethical implications and privacy issues associated with AI-driven relationships, Wolfe Herd remains optimistic about the potential of AI to foster healthier connections.

While Bumble's foray into AI-assisted dating represents a significant shift in the industry, experts caution against potential pitfalls, including emotional stress and privacy violations. The intersection of bots and romance has raised alarm bells, with past incidents highlighting the need for a legal and ethical framework to govern AI-powered relationships. Despite these challenges, Bumble remains committed to its mission of promoting healthy and equitable relationships through AI technology, dismissing concerns as a passing trend. As the dating landscape continues to evolve, the role of AI in shaping the way people connect and interact is likely to become increasingly prominent, potentially transforming the dating experience for millions of users worldwide.

The implications of Bumble's AI-driven approach to dating are multifaceted. On one hand, it offers potential benefits such as streamlining the matching process, providing personalised coaching and support, and potentially enhancing the overall user experience. By leveraging AI, Bumble aims to create a safer and more inclusive platform by empowering users to take control of their dating lives and make informed decisions.

However, there are also significant consequences and concerns to consider. The increasing reliance on AI in dating raises questions about privacy, data security, and the potential for emotional manipulation. Users may face challenges in establishing genuine connections and may experience heightened feelings of isolation or detachment from the dating process. Additionally, the ethical implications of AI-driven relationships, including issues of consent and autonomy, warrant careful consideration.

Furthermore, the broader societal impact of AI in dating extends beyond individual experiences. It may influence social norms and behaviours, reshape traditional notions of romance and intimacy, and contribute to the commodification of relationships. As AI continues to play a larger role in shaping the way people interact and form connections, it's essential to address these implications thoughtfully and proactively to ensure that technology serves the interests of all users and promotes healthy, fulfilling relationships.

***

Hi, I would be super interested to get peoples thoughts on this. For those currently single and looking - do you feel AI will be a help or a hindrance in online dating? Are you excited, concerned, or indifferent?

tomorrow, hopefully it can spark some discussion. 

What should I do if we've already been talking to each other for a month now, yet our feelings don't align. I do have more feelings towards her while she doesn't.

Hi there,

I’m a researcher from Trent University in Canada looking into how individual's lived experiences differs from their online identities/personas.

Our research aims to understand how people create social media profiles or video game characters, and the decisions people make around creating these personas. We are recruiting in this group, because we are interested in responses from people who use social media, dating apps, and role-playing video games. For this study, we are interested in interviewing people on Zoom for 30-45 minutes about the website, dating app, or game that they use most.

Please click the link above if you would like to participate. The link above contains study information, a consent form, and a place for you to submit your contact information. Please let me know if you have any questions below this post, or directly to my email in the link. You will be contacted shortly after submitting your contact info for next steps.

My colleagues and I will be posting in other subreddits as well. Thank you for your time. Cheers!

Pretty much Let people send you a review message on your profile whit out the action of liking.

The app should reward this by giving points you can spend on extra likes or boosts

Hello everyone I had not connected to the app since a while, and when i just did, i could only like 1 profil before being blocked behind choosing either basic or premium okcupid.

Is the app not free anymore and user forced to pay ?

I downloaded this app and went on answering a whole lot of questions (seriously). Before I delete the app I want to know what OKCupid makes of my responses. Has anyone been able to collect this data? It probably won't amount to much but a third-person (third-robot?) perspective is nice.

Its strange, I have always had my distance set to 250km from where I was. When I look at and swipe profiles anywhere even remotely near me, I get nothing. I guess Absolutely ZERO women in Europe are interested in me. Yet when I randomly swipe in the passport section every other person is a match. Apparently I am Mr. popular in South Asia and Africa but an absolute pariah in Europe. I can swipe for months and never get one match. Or the app is a scam and purposefully only matches you with far away matches you are likely never to actually go and meet because actually matching you would in reality hurt their business?

Below, all matches from passport section, randomly swiping right on everyone. Immediately everyone matched. All the matches below are from Africa and South Asia. LOL Convince me OkCupid isnt a scam. For those of you who just signed up, and you immediatly see 30-40 likes on your profile. Don't pay for it. Guaranteed they are all from far away places you would have no intention of ever going to. These dating companies can't make an honest living.

I’m interested in dating non binary people. But some for instance also identify as other or transmasculine which I’m not interested in. How do I filter them out?

I (27M) have been looking for a date for 3 months and thousands of likes I got 1 match. I'm cooked.

So I asked AI what kind of dating apps would be a fun alternative.

1. the bachelor dating app

2. Safe Dating App with AI

3. Love Island Dating App

4. Too Hot to Handle Dating app

5. Love is blind dating app

Which one would you wanna try?