Another door has slammed in English football's bedroom farce. Wayne Bridge, whose former partner was reported to have had an affair with John Terry – who was subsequently sacked as England captain – has withdrawn from the World Cup squad to spare himself the anguish of a trip to South Africa with his tormentor.
England's extended sex caper is threatening to engulf Fabio Capello's team, with the opening match against USA approaching fast on 12 June. Normally England wait until the quarter-finals to stage their implosion but this time hearts are being broken early.
The Professional Footballers' Association (PFA) claimed tonight to have offered mediation in the Bridge-Terry feud but said neither would take part. Students of awkwardness will flock to Stamford Bridge on Saturday to see Terry's Chelsea take on Bridge's Manchester City in the day's big Premier League clash. National news will be spun from the pre-match handshake, assuming there is one.
Bridge is known to be reluctant to feign chumminess with a former friend he considers guilty of betrayal. The truth and reconciliation phase is unlikely to start in such a high-stakes game.
Of the main World Cup contenders, only England could concoct such a ruinous vendetta. Former internationals were critical of Bridge for surrendering his chance to play in a World Cup over a conflict that might have been resolved between now and June.
The party line is that playing for one's country remains the game's highest honour but some international managers now doubt that theory. Bridge, the second-choice left-back behind Ashley Cole, another fixture of the kiss'n'tell industry, had been expected to set aside his resentment towards Terry, who struck up a relationship with Vanessa Perroncel after she and Bridge had parted. On Wednesday Capello said of Bridge: "No, he will be with us. No problems about the other things."
But today Bridge said: "I have thought long and hard about my position in the England football team in the light of the reporting and events over the last few weeks. It has always been an honour to play for England. However, after careful thought I believe my position in the squad is untenable and potentially divisive."
England's Italian coach has sometimes appeared flummoxed by the self-absorption of his star players and can now see that strict dress codes and bans on mobile phones cannot impose order on celebrity chaos. Complications multiply. In Rustenburg to inspect England's World Cup base, Capello found the team hotel to be a partial building site and the practice pitches to be inadequate.
The coach doubtless comprehends by now that the England job is a menagerie with a £5m salary to ease the culture shock. Terry was summoned to Wembley and stripped of the armband after a 12-minute conversation that showed Capello at his ruthless best. But there was more collateral damage when Bridge slammed the door on his international career. Some supporters argued today that Terry should resign from England so Bridge does not miss out.
Behind the red-top plot of a partner sliding across the England defence like Jabulani, the official World Cup ball, is severe disruption to England's preparations. Capello, who names his squad on Friday for the friendly against Egypt next Wednesday, faces the biggest test of his stentorian approach as well as his ability to hold a team together.
With Cole nursing a broken ankle and facing a divorce from Cheryl Cole as a result of his own alleged infidelities, Capello must hope his preferred left-back's injury heals quickly and will turn in the meantime to the inexperienced Stephen Warnock (Aston Villa) or Leighton Baines (Everton), who have played eight minutes of full England action between them.
In the first-choice England defence, David James, the senior goalkeeper, is 39 and marooned at a club (Portsmouth) who will go into administration tomorrow; Terry has been demoted to the ranks; Rio Ferdinand, his replacement as captain, is beset by persistent back trouble and Cole has taken up the baton of the major injury scare, which England always have. His difficulties stretch beyond a fractured ankle. At the weekend it was reported that Cole used a Chelsea club official, Steve Atkins, to help him deal with the fallout from alleged liaisons conducted on a club tour to America. This prompted Chelsea's owner, Roman Abramovich, to rebuke his players, via the chief executive, Ron Gourlay, at a meeting at the club's training ground. Abramovich is known to be exasperated by his team's penchant for the high life, which evokes Chelsea's fabled King's Road swingers of the early 1970s.
Terry was recently granted compassionate leave by Chelsea to visit his wife and children at their holiday base in Dubai. There is also an acceptance that Cole's attention will be diverted from the World Cup, should he regain match fitness in time to play.
Bridge, who has 36 England caps, is said to be "heartbroken". Strictly, his withdrawal is no great loss because he was a second-choice and in mediocre form. But sideshows – England's alternative national sport – seem bound to again undermine a country who have cornered the market in underachieving.