Balloon Juice - The Elders Have Authorized a Public Service Announcement for Alex Jones: There is No Civil War Planned for Independence Day 2018, Just the Global Conspiracy Round Robin Softball Tournament and Picnic!

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Our job is not to persuade republicans but to defeat them.

Let there be snark.

Fuck the extremist election deniers. What’s money for if not for keeping them out of office?

Is it negotiation when the other party actually wants to shoot the hostage?

So it was an October Surprise A Day, like an Advent calendar but for crime.

Republicans are radicals, not conservatives.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

Meanwhile over at truth Social, the former president is busy confessing to crimes.

Republicans do not pay their debts.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

“I never thought they’d lock HIM up,” sobbed a distraught member of the Lock Her Up Party.

fuckem (in honor of the late great efgoldman)

Proof that we need a blogger ethics panel.

A democracy can’t function when people can’t distinguish facts from lies.

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

They love authoritarianism, but only when they get to be the authoritarians.

Conservatism: there are some people the law protects but does not bind and others who the law binds but does not protect.

If senate republicans had any shame, they’d die of it.

It’s easy to sit in safety and prescribe what other people should be doing.

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

Hot air and ill-informed banter

Come on, media. you have one job. start doing it.

You are here: Home / Politics / America / The Elders Have Authorized a Public Service Announcement for Alex Jones: There is No Civil War Planned for Independence Day 2018, Just the Global Conspiracy Round Robin Softball Tournament and Picnic!

The Elders Have Authorized a Public Service Announcement for Alex Jones: There is No Civil War Planned for Independence Day 2018, Just the Global Conspiracy Round Robin Softball Tournament and Picnic!

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On behalf of the Elders, I have been authorized to inform Alex Jones, using this platform, that there is no Civil War scheduled for Independence Day. Instead we have, as per tradition, scheduled the annual Global Conspiracy for World Domination round robin softball tournament and picnic.

The Elders would like Mr. Jones to know that his claim of a Civil War is #Fake News! And since he is not responding via the device we had his dentist implant in the filling in his left, front, bottom molar when he had his wisdom tooth removed, we have had to resort to this manner of communication. Also, Mr. Jones, please see your dentist soon so we can have that thing serviced. Thanks!

Anyhow, as we do every year, at the recreational facilities at our undisclosed location (because it’s part of the global conspiracy for world domination, duh!), we will be having our annual round robin softball tournament and picnic. And let me tell you what a pain in the tuchas that is. Every year, EVERY FREAKING YEAR, it’s the same thing. The Illuminati sign up to bring the sides. And every year, EVERY FREAKING YEAR, they screw them up. How hard is it to make decent cole slaw? All you’re doing is shredding red and white cabbage with carrots, salting and peppering to taste, mixing it all together with the good mayonnaise and cider vinegar, and then tying it together with celery salt. How hard is that? If you can’t make cole slaw, how can we expect you to run your part of the global conspiracy? Don’t even get me started on their potato salad, macaroni salad, baked beans, and macaroni and cheese. How do you screw up baked beans? Open can, pour into baking pan. Mix with good stone ground mustard, brown sugar, and a shot or two of bourbon to taste. And make one batch without the fatback for those who don’t eat pork or meat. Nope, they just open the can, pour into a pot, and heat it up. Weak!!! SAD! Low Energy!!!!

As for the Bilderbergers. Masters of the Financial Universe my tuchas!!! Cheap bastards is more like it. They’re even worse than the Illuminati. I get it, if you splurge all the time, you’ll fritter away your fortunes, but these cheapskates sign up to bring the cups, plates, plastic flatware, and napkins every year. And they can’t even be bothered to get the solo cups and the decent plastic plates. No they get the styrofoam coffee cups and the flimsy, poorly wax treated paper plates. And sporks. I get the KFC connection, but really order some plastic flatware from Amazon for crying out loud!

The Trilateral Commission always brings the crappy, store bought chemical cake deserts! For Deity’s sake, every decent grocery store actually has a bakery if you can’t be bothered to go to a stand alone bakery. The good news is the Freemasons are good at setting up and running that nice brick grill every year. And we finally got the Romneys – all 300 of them including the Romney-McDaniels – to stop bringing the jello salad. We told them that the Pope was allergic to gelatin (Don’t tell anyone…) Also, he brings the good chiarascura and chimchurri. All Benedict every brought was sauerkraut. The Reptiloids just bring their own food because they have specific dietary restrictions…

Sorry, where was I? Oh yes: Attention Alex Jones! There is not a planned Civil War scheduled to kickoff on Wednesday. Please lie down in a cool dark room for a nap. And if that doesn’t help, please seek professional help before you get someone so worked up they decide to take the 2nd Amendment out for a walk and kill someone. Or lots of someones. And don’t forget to see your dentist soon, so we can get that receiver in your molar fixed. In fact we’re going to upgrade you and put one in the molar on the other side so you can receive our transmissions in stereo. For no extra charge. And have a nice day!

Stay suspicious.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled web browsing.

Open thread!

Reader Interactions

370Comments

  1. 1.

    Roger Moore

    Don’t even get me started on their potato salad, macaroni salad, baked beans, and macaroni and cheese.

    They put raisins in the potato salad, don’t they.

  3. 3.

    satby

    Yeah, I know First Amendment, but can’t they keep this guy off the air before he gets more people killed just based on the lies he’s already told?

  5. 5.

    JPL

    My favorite part of Homeland season 7 was the Alex Jones character. Spoiler Alert He was a f.king coward. Even if you never watched the series, it’s worth it to watch the episodes that the Alex Jones character is in.

  6. 6.

    Gin & Tonic

    How do you screw up baked beans? Open can, pour into baking pan.

    That’s Step 1 in screwing them up, right? Cause that’s not the way you make baked beans.

  8. 8.

    Origuy

    Try to get the Bavarian Illuminati to bring Bavarian potato salad. The Erisian Liberation Front are bringing apple pies, as always.
    Tell the Mormons to make funeral potatoes from scratch this year. The ones from WalMart taste like ass.

  12. 12.

    Adam L Silverman

    I just can’t keep up anymore…

  13. 13.

    MomSense

    @Lapassionara:

    I could always add some lobster to the mac ‘n cheese. We might as well go for it and I can use my Soros check to buy the lobsters!

  17. 17.

    dmsilev

    I assume that the Deep State is responsible for booking the playing field and picnic tables.

  23. 23.

    Duane

    @Adam L Silverman: Don’t get me started. I didn’t get invited to the softball game (again) and my Sorosbucks haven’t came. 2nd amendment rights for a walk, you say. Where’s that softball game?

  26. 26.

    Roger Moore

    @Lapassionara:

    They bring macaroni and cheese? The Illuminati? Is that kosher?

    Why would mac and cheese not be kosher? Sure, it’s dairy, but you don’t have to include any meat. And why would the Illuminati care about keeping kosher? That would be the Elders of Zion, TYVM.

  31. 31.

    Adam L Silverman

    @Duane: I’ll make sure the Elders take this up during new business at the next meeting. I’m adding it to the agenda now.

  32. 32.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Phylllis: Luckily I have a daughter who lives south of the Mason-Dixon line, since you can’t get it up here in New England.

  35. 35.

    jimmiraybob

    Strange. As I was reading this my left front lower tooth started vibrating.

  37. 37.

    Phylllis

    @Gin & Tonic: My hubby, who moved here from Columbus GA, was looking for the mayo one day not long after arriving and asked “Where’s the Hellman’s?” My response was “Whazzat?”

  38. 38.

    Major Major Major Major

    Can confirm that the homosexual agenda has no civil war on it; first week of July always left empty to clean up after Pride.

  41. 41.

    Boris, Rasputin's Evil Twin

    I keep saying it; in a better country Alex Jones, Rush, Coulter, the Faux News group and tehe rest would be getting the care and meds they so desperately need

  48. 48.

    But her emails!!

    Frack! 2 days notice! How am I ever going to find childcare on such short notice on a holiday?

  49. 49.

    JPL

    At some point, someone will be charged with treason, and then Trump will pardon them.

  50. 50.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    The Democrats are having a Civil War on Wednesday? Why was I not informed, I’ve been a party member for over 40 years!

    (Drafts angry letter to the DNC.)

  55. 55.

    Wapiti

    Yeah, I’m not in charge, but maybe Twitter shouldn’t give blue checkmarks to people who don’t do their own tweets. If it’s going out over your signature, own it.

  58. 58.

    Steve in the ATL

    Why are there never Episcopalian revolutions? Think of the single malt scotch, the French wines, the boeuf bourguignon–no raisin-infested potato salad!

  61. 61.

    Boris, Rasputin's Evil Twin

    Grigori and I are signed up to provide the punch, as usual. THIS time we promise it won’t be just straight iced vodka. Sorry about that last debacle/debauch. We honestly forgot normal people need to mix vodka with other things to keep upright.

  62. 62.

    efgoldman

    @Mike in NC:

    How did Alex Jones not get hired as Trump’s chief of staff?

    Coulrn’t afford the pay cut.

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Do you think I type it up and mimeograph all those copies for my health?

    Everyone knows you do it to sniff the fluid.

  65. 65.

    Shreiking Wombat

    July 4. Is this the one the good Senators are celebrating in Moscow?

  70. 70.

    Jeffro

    @Adam L Silverman: it’s like you are SAYING there are these “Elders”…so that I will THINK you are kidding…and that’s how I know that the ELDERS ARE REAL!!

    Nice try, Deep Elder Illuminati State Man!!

  73. 73.

    TS (the original)

    The Obamas made 4th July a big event – trump really has no interest in the US or its traditions. All he wants is to hurt and humiliate those who disagree with him. He is president for the 27% and all they want is to be seen to be above the “others”.

    I am remaining in the mode of “this cannot be real”

  76. 76.

    Brachiator

    @Mike in NC:
    RE: How did Alex Jones not get hired as Trump’s chief of staff?

    I keep hearing rumors that Kelly will resign soon. I’m sure that Jones would be ready to fill that gap.

  80. 80.

    Mike J

    @Phylllis:

    My hubby, who moved here from Columbus GA, was looking for the mayo one day not long after arriving and asked “Where’s the Hellman’s?” My response was “Whazzat?”

    In college my roommate and I had an east coast/west coast mayo feud. “Bring out the [Hellman’s | Best Foods] and bring out the best.” Still don’t know why they didn’t go with “bring out the Hell.”

  82. 82.

    Adam L Silverman

    What an asshole!

    From the Gazette:
    http://www.capitalgazette.com/news/annapolis/bs-ac-cn-flag-request-denied-20180702-story.html

    President Donald Trump has declined a request from Annapolis Mayor Gavin Buckley to lower American flags in honor of the fatal shooting of five employees of The Capital newspaper last week.

    “Obviously, I’m disappointed, you know? … Is there a cutoff for tragedy?” Buckley said Monday afternoon. “This was an attack on the press. It was an attack on freedom of speech. It’s just as important as any other tragedy.”

    Gov. Larry Hogan ordered Maryland state flags to be lowered to half-staff from Friday through sunset on Monday.

    Through Maryland’s congressional delegation, Buckley put in a request to the White House over the weekend to lower the American flags.

    Buckley had said he hoped having the American flags lowered, too, would help keep national attention on the attack.

    Trump has ordered flags lowered for previous mass shootings, including in May after the deaths of 10 people at Santa Fe High School in Santa Fe, Texas, and the shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Fla., in February that left 17 dead.

    While Buckley had previously thought he might lower the city’s own flags regardless of the president’s decision, the mayor said his wife talked him out of that.

    “At this point in time, it would start to polarize people and I don’t want to make people angry,” he said.

    The White House did not immediately respond Monday to a request for comment.

  86. 86.

    Adam L Silverman

    @Brachiator: Slurry of cornstarch and organic, non GMO, sustainably farmed beet juice as the red coloring to make vegan blood. You can find the recipe in the Veganarchist’s Cookbook.

  88. 88.

    Jeffro

    @Adam L Silverman: OMG that’s totally Mack Bolan ‘shopped into that! How many of those* did I read during my teen years?

    Ok it was actually about 3-4 before the crappy writing wore thin. But still!!

    *includes 1 “Able Team” and 1 “Phoenix Force” in those 3-4 books ?

  89. 89.

    Adam L Silverman

    For our legal flegals: I’m guessing this isn’t kosher

  90. 90.

    Steeplejack

    @Phylllis:

    I bought a jar of Duke’s mayonnaise recently because I hadn’t had it in quite a while, and I gotta say it confirmed for me that I’m a Hellmann’s guy. But I’m not a fanatic.

  91. 91.

    dm

    @Adam L Silverman: w-e-l-l, I suppose Paul could have said that he was shocked and disgusted and the staffer had been fired, and “don’t hire anyone who says they worked for me from XXXX to June or July 2018 without asking them and me why they left my employ”, but that would have been uncivil.

  93. 93.

    Sister Golden Bear

    My mother passed peacefully from pancreatic cancer this morning. It progressed shockingly fast — they only found a mass six weeks ago. She was 84 and lived a good life, and the silver lining is that up until two months ago, she’d been extremely healthy and active for her age, doing all the things see wanted.

    Today’s been a bit of extreme cognitive dissonance. It’s my birthday, so I’m spent the day fielding both birthday greetings and condolences. Had a feeling it was going to happen, since she’d surprised the hospice nurses by hanging on through the weekend. I was born at 9:59 a.m. and she died at 9:49 a.m. Even though she’d been unconscious for more than a week, she somehow knew.

  95. 95.

    Miss Bianca

    @Steve in the ATL: Brother, I am toasting the Episcopal Revolution with a seasonal gin and tonic! (Hey, we may be revolutionaries, but we respect tradition!)

    @Sister Golden Bear: Oh, my dear, I am so sorry to hear that. My condolences on your mother’s passing.

  104. 104.

    Miss Bianca

    @lamh36: OK, that’s the first time I’ve actually seen that. *Now* I understand the true glory (?!) of “Karen’s potato salad”!

  107. 107.

    germy

    I see Alex Jones' July 4th prediction as an attempt to incite violent acts from the right and not just something to be casually laughed off. A lot of people casually laughed off Trump's candidacy and look how well that turned out.— Ragnarok Lobster (@eclecticbrotha) July 2, 2018

  110. 110.

    Adam L Silverman

    @dm: The President has a tariff pertaining to intellectual property that will sort this all out.

  111. 111.

    cynthia ackerman

    I did not think it was a secret that this shindig takes place each year on Jekyl Island.

    Adam, part of the problem here is that these brainwave can’t be trusted to plan ahead, and when they get to Jekyl there’s no Piggly Wiggly for last-minute logistics.

    Cut these overlords some slack, will you?

  120. 120.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Sister Golden Bear: My sympathies. I see not that much has changed – when my father died from the same thing thirty-plus years ago, it was precisely eight weeks from diagnosis to funeral.

  122. 122.

    Adam L Silverman

    @MagdaInBlack: That is one of the best stand up routines. The whole Britain and the EU bit is hysterical. As is the Stonehenge set.

  127. 127.

    (((CassandraLeo)))

    @Sister Golden Bear: My condolences as well. Please take care of yourself. I wish I had something else reassuring to add here, but in my experience words are fairly empty responses to loss. You’ll certainly be in this community’s thoughts, and if you ask for help, I’m sure we’ll do what we can.

  128. 128.

    ? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?

    Serious question. How come conspiracies like the one you describe don’t happen in real life? I’m in the process of writing a story that involves a collection of high-level white supremacists, reactionaries, fascists, rogue government agencies, and revanchists wanting to revive the British Empire seeking to overthrow the established world order during the Cold War (80s). Does this sound like a realistic scenario?

  136. 136.

    Adam L Silverman

    @? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?: Do you know how hard it is to keep a real conspiracy from becoming public? The more people that have to be involved, even if everything is compartmented, the more likely something will leak out or become visible. Organized crime is effective not because they’re able to keep everything covert, but because they wield enough power and influence that no one will confirm or deny anything. Or cross them.

  137. 137.

    Kathleen

    @Adam L Silverman: Also, tell The Elders not to plan these events on “L&O SVU Bingeathon Days”. Warn them that they will have to pry the remote from my cold dead hands.

  138. 138.

    Schlemazel

    @Adam L Silverman:
    I got to play with an original Kriegsmarine version when I did a gig for NSA back in 2000. I had a spiffy widget for my PC the simulated an enigma but it does not work on newer Windows and the current ones are not as slick as that one was.

    Math is not my strong suit but I honest to pasta do not understand how you break that code. I have read a lot about how it was done and I know they used a lot of ‘tricks’ but to start from zero and crack it is beyond my comprehension.

  148. 148.

    ? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?

    @Adam L Silverman:
    So I guess it would need to primarily be a small group of powerful men (and it would be all men) that have extensive contacts with covert government agencies that either bribe/blackmail who ever they need to or just kill them. They would also need to manipulate others from behind the scenes to achieve their goals.

  153. 153.

    Barbara

    @Sister Golden Bear: Holding you and your mother in the light. Knowing she had a good life makes it harder and easier to accept at the same time. I am so sorry for your loss.

  157. 157.

    Schlemazel

    @Gin & Tonic:
    Understood, It was a Polish mathematician that started the work. But, by “starting from zero” I meant having an encrypted message, not having the settings or known message (A Norwegian weather observer would send “all clear” on nice days) and still being able to crack the code. The French intel also added a lot of information that allowed the polish to understand how to build a copy, before their work the Poles were guessing how the box was wired & counting more on those known messages than actual breaking.

  158. 158.

    Kathleen

    @Adam L Silverman: I thought Goldman Sachs was bankrolling this. That’s why Hillary spoke at their event. Don’t these corrupt banksters talk to each other?

  163. 163.

    Schlemazel

    @Adam L Silverman:
    To put it mildly.

    There is an interesting book, “England’s Secret Weapons of WWII” that details some of the odd characters and some very funny incidents as they went about their very serious work.

  164. 164.

    Shell

    Civil War, eh? Is it Fort Sumpter again?
    *********
    And just to note, I still have to sign in every time I come back to BJ.

  169. 169.

    NobodySpecial

    @Brendan in NC: Don’t feel bad. They were the male equivalent of Danielle Steel novels. Kind of like how WWE is General Hospital for manly mens. They were decent reads if you just wanted to check your brain for a few hours.

  170. 170.

    Major Major Major Major

    @Shell: you may have to clear your cache and delete any balloon-juice.com cookies.

    My name is finally sticking around!

  173. 173.

    Jeffro

    @NobodySpecial: Stony Man Doctrine!

    Loved that one and it seems to be hard to find at the used bookstores these days…IF I had been looking, that is…

  176. 176.

    Steeplejack

    @Shell:

    Try doing a “hard” page refresh (Ctrl-F5 in Firefox or Chrome) to also refresh the underlying cached pages.

  177. 177.

    zhena gogolia

    We just watched the first episode of A Very English Scandal (Hugh Grant, Ben Whishaw, Alex Jennings) on Amazon Prime, and it is excellent. I have no recollection of the actual events, but I’m going to stay away from Wikipedia so I don’t get any spoilers the way I did with Wolf Hall. Historical ignorance can be useful for enjoying a good story.

  178. 178.

    Patricia Kayden

    @Adam L Silverman: The problem for Ron Paul is that this isn’t the first time his “staff” has “inadvertently” published bigoted trash. He also tried to use the same lie to distance himself from his racist newsletters when he ran for President.

  179. 179.

    satby

    @Sister Golden Bear: so often loved ones hang on for a milestone, she wanted to make it to your birthday and did. Deepest condolences on the loss of your mom. It is disorienting even without a birthday to complicate it so let yourself have all the feels you need to.

  184. 184.

    PaulWartenberg

    I have one simple argument why starting a civil war on the 4th of July is a bad idea:

    All the state highway patrols and county/city cops are going to be out in force with their DUI checkpoints to nab drunk drivers. Which librul is gonna be stupid enough to try and sneak molotov cocktails through a police checkpoint?

    Seriously, we’re more worried about Karen’s potato salad than about starting up a goddamn civil war. We’re saving that for when the weather cools, say September, Labor Day, that’ll work.

  185. 185.

    Steeplejack

    @NobodySpecial:

    My father introduced me to John D. MacDonald’s Travis McGee novels, which are classics, but also to Philip Atlee’s Joe Gall novels, which . . . aren’t. But they were addictive.

    I say “introduced me,” but it was more like I randomly picked up the paperbacks after he read them.

  186. 186.

    NotMax

    @zhena gogolia

    Pretty good, albeit plays fast and loose with some of what really took p0lace.

    The years have not been kind to Hugh Grant; he’s looking more and more like a late in life Fred Gwynne on a bad day. Had seen Mr. Whishaw in some other stuff and he’s never been less than stellar. Although apparently typecast as the go-to actor for playing a young, lanky, less than extroverted/angst ridden gay guy. If it is still available (forget if Netflix, Amazon Prime or both), check him out in London Spy.

  188. 188.

    ? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?

    @Adam L Silverman:
    Maybe “realistic” wasn’t the best description. Perhaps I’m looking for “does not violate suspension of disbelief”. James Bond movies aren’t exactly realistic, but one should be able to find the events of the story believable in the context of the show’s universe.

  189. 189.

    Patricia Kayden

    @zhena gogolia: Looks interesting. I must say that the British are excellent at period movies and tv shows. Thankfully, there are quite a few of them on YouTube. My favorite is “Our Mutual Friend” (1998 version). Romance, comedy, tragedy and mystery all rolled up in one.

  190. 190.

    efgoldman

    @Patricia Kayden:

    He also tried to use the same lie to distance himself from his racist newsletters when he ran for President.

    Who cares? What fucking difference does it make? He’s a complete political non-entity; maybe a couple of racist cranks follow him. Yeah, condemn him when he posts shit like this but it won’t make a five vote difference in a primary, none in a general.
    There are bigger and nastier fish to fry.

    Fuckem

  196. 196.

    ? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?

    @Major Major Major Major:

    the computer from The Moon Is A Harsh Mistress. Might try a writerly trick like that.

    Mind explaining what that means?

    How does Lex Luthor get away with the shit he does all the time? One of the main villains is that type.

  199. 199.

    Steve in the ATL

    @NotMax: Netflix. And if you haven’t read Tom Rob Smith’s novels, you should. It’s unfortunately important that we learn as much about Russia as possible these days.

  201. 201.

    NotMax

    @zhena gogolia

    Lots and lots of Dickens on Amazon Prime. Including the production of Martin Chuzzlewit with Paul Scofield and Pete Postlethwaite.

    Also there is Dickensian (or as I call it, Who Murdered Jacob Marley?). Labor of love production which mixes characters from many Dickens novels in one stew. A+ for effort, B+ for result. In comic book terms, think of it as Earth-Dickens. Worth a peek.

  203. 203.

    Gravenstone

    @Jeffro: you must have come to the series late, when they launched the companion series. The original books from the early 70s were kind of pulpy fun.

  205. 205.

    ? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?

    @sukabi:
    What’s currently going on is definitely an inspiration for me. The story is definitely an allegory for the dangers of reactionary ideology, with the help of cosmic powers/magic, leading to totalitarianism in its purest form; an all powerful, immortal maniac eliminating human free will to “protect” humanity from itself.

  206. 206.

    NotMax

    Someone passed out at the switch. Monthly civil defense test message crawl still running across the top of the screen, announcing that it is for only 11:13 p.m. to 12:13 p.m. Now nearly four hours past the time it ought to have gone bye-bye.

  207. 207.

    Jeffro

    @Gravenstone: came in just before SMD, but also went back a bit

    They’re all fun…so are James Bond movies and Wolverine comics. Nothing wrong with a little righteous blasting away at the bad guys, carving them up, or beating them at baccarat!

  210. 210.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Jeffro: I’d have never learned how to play baccarat without the James Bond novels. I am sure that this knowledge will save my life someday.

  215. 215.

    Schlemazel

    @? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?:
    Heinlein ‘invents’ a sentient computer that controls every aspect of life on the penal colony of the moon. he engineers a revolution to gain independence for the moon and gets away with it because so few people know he in manipulating everything/one

  216. 216.

    Davebo

    @Omnes Omnibus: Played once at the Monte Carlo Casino during a port visit to Cannes in 1986. I lost and couldn’t afford a drink there to drown my sorrows but hey, I played baccarat in the Monte Carlo Casino so I got that going for me…

  219. 219.

    Davebo

    @Omnes Omnibus: Well I’m going back to the area next May (Juan les Pins) and I earn slightly more than an E-5 these days so I just might give it another try.

    I really want to spend just one night in the Carlton hotel in Cannes. Doubt I’ll do it this trip.

  223. 223.

    frosty

    @Mike J: Baby steps. I’ve been converted from Miracle Whip to Hellman’s. Even for my Mom’s Classic 1950s Potato Salad. (no raisins or [shudder] hard boiled eggs).

  224. 224.

    Patricia Kayden

    @Boris, Rasputin’s Evil Twin: Or they simply wouldn’t have such large and impressionable audiences. I can’t believe that anyone actually takes Alex Jones seriously. But alas, he has huge numbers of subscribers and followers on social media. Sigh.

  225. 225.

    FlyingToaster

    @? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?:

    an all powerful, immortal maniac eliminating human free will to “protect” humanity from itself.

    Skynet. We know what’s coming.

    Actually, everything right now looks like a run-up to Neuromancer, so I’m trying to make sure everything’s sufficiently diversified before the grand economic collapse.

  226. 226.

    trollhattan

    Boy howdy, Cousins goes to Warriors? Pacific Division should be…interesting.

  227. 227.

    Davebo

    @Gin & Tonic: My girl has a small 1 bedroom flat there five minutes walk to the beach. She doesn’t normally rent it out but maybe I could hook you up! This will be my first trip there.

  229. 229.

    NMgal

    And don’t forget to see your dentist soon, so we can get that receiver in your molar fixed.

    Fun fact: IRL, Alex Jones’s dad is a dentist in Austin. I know someone who was his patient. Mr. Jones (pere) is rather embarrassed by his son, by all accounts.

  231. 231.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Davebo: I really want to spend just one night in the Carlton hotel in Cannes. Doubt I’ll do it this trip.

    For me it’s the Connaught in London. And while I’m in England throwing money around I’ll spend a night at the Randolph in Oxford, and raise a glass to Inspector Morse in the bar. I don’t imagine I’ll be the first Morse-ophile to do this.

  238. 238.

    Steve in the ATL

    @ruemara: his followers are morons. If they were not morons, they would not be following him.

    Apologies for answering your rhetorical question, but it’s good to remind everyone that Alex Jones’ followers are morons.

  241. 241.

    frosty

    @?BillinGlendaleCA: Hey! That’s my Mom you’re calling a monster…. and me until Spousal Unit forced me to make it with Hellman’s and I reluctantly agreed it tasted better. /pout/

    ETA: My nym! My nym!!!!

  244. 244.

    FlyingToaster

    @Major Major Major Major: Is the future going to be a powerless federal state with infinite private enclaves/policing or is it going to be a balkanized US where the major economic centers are unified despite state boundaries and the rest of the place is left in the dust? Where a zaibatsu has more input into every damn thing than your alderman? Fuck if I know.

  247. 247.

    Davebo

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: She’s in London 4 or more times a year and loves this smaller hotel but honestly I can’t remember the name. I do remember it’s all inclusive with good fizz.

    Next years trip is 3 nights at GlenEagles, then Juan les Pins for 5, the 2 nights at St. Andrews. I haven’t played golf since the 80’s but I’m starting lessons now as she generally does 2 10 day trips each year to GlenEagles and I make at least one of them. A time share house near the hotel. I’m liking falling for a Scottish girl so far.

  248. 248.

    J R in WV

    @Phylllis:

    You people are strange… everyone east of the Mississip knows Hellmans is the best. And Best is Hellmans, west of the Mississip…

    We have a flash flood warning running 90 miles across central WV. Strange weather pattern, air flow from the South, meeting an airflow from the WNW, the storm grew SWward as the two air masses met. Very odd looking on the NWS radar…

    Softball?? I’m going to stay in if it’s as hot as it has been… so hot it takes my breath away! Running mid-70s, we’re in the shade mostly. That helps a little. But still, so hot, so humid. Makes the recollection of working at Ingalls shipyard in Pascagoula all summer pale!!!

  251. 251.

    frosty

    @Sister Golden Bear: My condolences. I lost my mom a little less than 2 years ago, after years of decline. I don’t know if grief is easier to take if it’s sudden or if it’s more loss year by year, but in either case it’s hard.

    Both my parents hung on until just after their birthdays; my dad until the day after he turned 80.

  254. 254.

    Villago Delenda Est

    So, the comments pages don’t seem to have this problem, but the main page, Firefox tells me, is still transferring data from ‘cdn.syndication.twyimg.com’. In perpetuity.

  255. 255.

    frosty

    @Davebo:

    (Juan les Pins)

    I camped there for a few nights when I did a Railpass Walkabout n my 20s. It took me a day or two to remember to pronounce the J instead of of leaving it silent, Spanish style.

  257. 257.

    Major Major Major Major

    @FlyingToaster: I’m mostly thinking of how the Snow Crash economy seems to be fully Uberized and how they have privately run white supremacist colonies next to privately run extensions of China, and the major rising political force is climate refugee cultists.

  259. 259.

    JAFD

    My condolences to Sister Golden Bear. My father passed on about three weeks after his 90th birthday, my mother, the next year, about three weeks short of hers.

    I was raised on Hellmans, but, IMAO, have concluded that it has too much sugar and too little vinegar. Mrs Schlorer’s is the best commercial brand, but the ShopRite store brand is also very good.

    There are, of course, alternatives:
    “”A unique tradition among the better families was the interest which men took in cooking: often the men marketed for meat, and, curious fact, it was their prerogative to make mayonnaise.”
    John Lukacs, _Philadelphia, Patricians and Philistines, 1900-1950_ (c)1981, p. 16 “

  261. 261.

    ? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?

    @Major Major Major Major:

    Yeah, I’d definitely try not to let the message of the story overwhelm the story itself. An issue I’m having is conceptualizing how magic can exist in a universe with fairly realistic physics. One solution I came up with is that the two universes were once one in the same a thousand years ago or so, incorporating a lot of medieval myths like Arthurian legend. Fact is, they weren’t myths, but are faint memories of something that actually existed before some other power decided to remove the magical elements from Earth and edit history. I’ve also thought that an immortal but weakened Merlin (perhaps he would be the one to have done it?) would be a character in the story, having eventually run out of luck and gotten caught in an increasingly smaller world sometime in the 20th century, being studied by the cabal I talked about in attempt to gain immortality.

  262. 262.

    Yarrow

    @ruemara: People believe what they want to believe. He encourages them to believe the crazy stuff they want to believe so his followers are happy.

    He makes most of his money selling supplements. I really can’t believe people buy his supplements and other crap. I mean, how is he any kind of expert? Awhile ago I ended up on some health website and clicked through to read about some crazy sounding supplement they were recommending. It took me to his site. I couldn’t believe it as the website itself didn’t seem that insane. I let my cursor hover over links to other things they were recommending and they all linked there. I guess it was a front website for his supplement crap. I closed that tab right quick!

  263. 263.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @Yarrow: The supplements are offered to “cure” the effects of chem trails and other invented conspiracy crap, and his moran followers keep buying the stuff, which has no actual real effect whatsoever, because the maladies are utter fantasy.

  265. 265.

    The Very Reverend Crimson Fire of Compassion

    @Sister Golden Bear: Oh, baby, I’m so sorry. I just lost my own Mom this spring, and the ironies that pile up around their deaths can feel gratuitous. Know that you are thought about, prayed for, and rooted for.

  268. 268.

    Yarrow

    @Villago Delenda Est: Someone did a comparison of his supplements and Gwyneth’s Paltrow’s Goop supplements. They’re selling the same or very similar stuff but marketing it in completely different ways.

  270. 270.

    frosty

    @? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?: Sounds interesting, particularly the long lost magic remembered as myth. My advice is to try not to overthink the details, just state it and run with it. I tried writing a sci-fi novel years ago and got hung up on describing the characters’ ages (he’s 26) when Earth and Earth years were nowhere to be found. It didn’t seem to bother any of the other authors I read.

  271. 271.

    Mnemosyne

    @Yarrow:

    I think that one of the commenters here said that the best place to buy supplements is Costco, because they have fairly strict quality control standards for their house brand, unlike most companies.

  273. 273.

    Brachiator

    @ruemara:

    I seriously do not understand how that man has followers who believe him.

    The fearful and ignorant eagerly follow the angry and ignorant.

  274. 274.

    frosty

    @Jay: No no no no no. If you put eggs in it it’s egg salad. Potatoes, celery, onions, and mayo*. And a sprinkling of paprika on top for color.

    * Of course , one *may* have to redefine Miracle Whip as mayo, 50 years ago, anyway.

  276. 276.

    barbequebob

    @Mike J:

    Company that makes Hellman’s is Best Foods, so I think they are the same thing with different names East/West USA.

    I am a lifelong Hellman’s fan (live in Northeast). Currently in AK I eat Best Foods and as far as I can taste, it tastes same as Hellman’s to me.

  278. 278.

    Steve in the ATL

    I’m trying to have a pleasant evening, but people keep bringing up Miracle Whip….

  279. 279.

    NotMax

    Snippet (from memory) of an old Hudson & Landry bit. Interview with a country yokel visiting the Big City.

    REPORTER: So what do you grow on your farm?

    YOKEL: Buckwheat and radishes.

    REPORTER: That brings in good money, does it?

    YOKEL: The buckwheat, yeah. Not the radishes though. No sirree. They’re a loser.

    REPORTER: Why do you grow them then?

    YOKEL: To keep away the wolverines, dummy! Ev’rybody knows that!

    REPORTER: In all the years you’ve lived three, have you ever seen a wolverine?

    YOKEL: Nope. Them radishes really work!

  281. 281.

    Yarrow

    Does someone have one of those tiny violin emojis?

    Harvard's Alan Dershowitz says defending Trump has made him a discrimination victim: "I have experienced this firsthand on Martha’s Vineyard. Old friends are shunning me and trying to ban me from their social life."— John Harwood (@JohnJHarwood) July 2, 2018

  282. 282.

    Davebo

    Well I’m off. Tomorrow is a surreal day for me. It marks 5 years since my wife of 24 years passed and at the same time I have dinner with my new love, then my birthday celebration on the 4th.

    One can remember the love lost without dwelling too much in the past and trying to make a new future I suppose.

    Wish me luck. Doing a 5 bone standing rib roast Wednesday for a small gathering. Hope they like it at most medium rare!

  285. 285.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @barbequebob: According to Wikipedia, Hellmann’s and Best Foods are both made at the same plant, from the same recipe. As recently as 2003 they were slightly different, Best Foods being a bit more tangy. But now, same thing.

  289. 289.

    James E Powell

    Over the years I’ve enjoyed a variety of recipes for potato salad and macaroni salad. Every family’s got their essential ingredients and I’m wiling to try almost anything.

    But if you’re making cole slaw, then it’s got to be Marzetti’s.

  291. 291.

    Jay

    @frosty:

    No, no, no, no, no,

    No more than 3 boiled eggs, 3 different potatoes, bakers for the fluffy, Yukons for the flavour, boilers for holding the texture.

    No celery or celery seeds, might as well add cilantro,

    Malt vinigar, not white, added to the potatos after the boil, fresh parsley, salt and pepper added to the potatoes not the salad.

    A mix of blend and chunks, 40% blend, 60% chunks, fork ready.

    Wallawalla’s raw, for sweet and crunch.

    Up here, when it hits +38c, it’s a summer meal, not a side, with watermellon for dessert.
    Done right, it

  292. 292.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Steve in the ATL:

    Wherever you find four Episcopalians, you’ll find a fifth!

    Whiskypalians, Rum’n’Catholics.

    (Got a million of ’em. Try your waitress, tip the veal.)

  293. 293.

    Kay

    @jdawsey1
    4h4 hours ago
    More
    Scott Pruitt told EPA aides that he wanted his wife to make $200,000 or more a year — and suggested she get a job at the Republican Attorney Generals Association, which he led. He also asked EPA lawyers to help him win a dispute with his landlord.

    I love “help him win”. Not just help him, but win. I hope he said that. He probably did.

    Let’s not even get into that he asked EPA lawyers to help with his sleazy, corrupt landlord tenant dispute. Because that’s right up their alley.

    Someone needs to write a book just about the corrupt things Pruitt has done since 2016. It’s book-length, that story.

  294. 294.

    Ruckus

    @Mnemosyne:
    I think they actually have standards. That’s a step up for a lot of supplement suppliers. And of course there are brands that are done right but they are mostly things that you actually need.

  296. 296.

    NotMax

    @barbequebob

    Exact same product, different label.

    Have grown fond of the Wilsey’s whole egg mayo from Costco. Reminiscent of the mayo one gets at a top notch deli. And for less than half the price of Hellman’s get a container twice as large.

    The Kirkland (house brand) mayo at Costco tastes darn close to Hellman’s and costs much less as well.

  297. 297.

    ? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?

    @frosty: @Major Major Major Major:

    Well, I’ve always been that person that asks questions about lore and plot holes. I’ve always been interested in back stories and settings. It always annoys me when a book, TV show, or movie purposely leaves the wider world of the setting and how it works vague.

    Thanks for the feedback! All of this has been in my head for awhile and even when I start to plan it out on “paper”, the story goes through organic changes. I’m also afraid I’ll write shitty/offensive characters that I won’t be able to write sensitively enough. I guess I’ll just have to suck it up one of these days.

  299. 299.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @Sister Golden Bear:

    Oh, what a loss. I’m so sorry. I’m not going to wish you a happy birthday, but I hope in years to come your birthday celebrations will be coloured by happy memories of your mother. Big {{{{{hugs}}}}} to you in the meantime.

  300. 300.

    Yarrow

    @NotMax: But if you buy it at Costco you have to buy those huge containers. I couldn’t use that much mayo in a year!

  303. 303.

    Peale

    @Kay: when Baud finally becomes president, I am going to to ask him to appoint me to the EPA. I will invite the heads of the oil companies and their chemical industry flunkies to a secret meeting in Pruitt’s secure room for an eight hour behind closed door meeting and just yammer on about professionalism and decorum. I will have dined on a meal of baked beans, beets and cabbage beforehand. I won’t say “pardon me” once.

    Seriously, this is the best the industry could do? They have no better crooked people?

  305. 305.

    Ruckus

    @Yarrow:
    I don’t actually shop there any more. It’s sort of a pain, there isn’t really one near me and the cost of the membership was not quite paid for by the savings. I’m a family of one and I haven’t eaten like a teenager in years.

  308. 308.

    Sister Golden Bear

    Thank you all. Today has been… complicated… but I’m hanging in there.

    And yes, she did have a good life, travelled the world and to all seven continents. One reason she opted for hospice care only, she didn’t want to go through chemo, etc. and live out her months being housebound. (Plus I suspect she somehow knew that things were more advanced than the doctors thought.)

    One small consolation: I’m leaving in less than two weeks to go to Thailand for major surgery and won’t be back until mid-August. So while this happening now has been hugely disruptive to prepping for the trip (and prepping for the post-op recovery once I’m back) at least it didn’t happen while I was away. Both so I could spend time with Mom, and so that I’ve also been able to help out my brother in starting to settle her estate. (Neither of us lives in SoCal, I’m in the Bay Area and he’s from Rhode Island, which makes things far harder.)

    BTW, just wanted to say that while I rarely get a chance to comment, keeping up with the jackaltariat is one of the things keeping me sane these days — especially the last few days.

    Off to see some good friends and strong alcohol shortly.

  310. 310.

    Kay

    @Peale:

    One of his aides had to eat a 600 dollar tab she covered for the Pruitt family because he was too fucking lazy to get his expenses in on time. After that he had them running the Pruitt family personal stuff on government time.

    Someone should call 911. The Pruitt family need to be collared before they get away with this heist. They owe us several million dollars in restitution and they’re still looting as we speak.

  311. 311.

    J R in WV

    @? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?:

    When you ask “Does this sound like a realistic scenario?” you forget what fiction is. It is stuff that you make up. Realistic isn’t related to fiction. People write fiction with a president selling out to a hostile foreign power, how is that realistic?

    See how that works?

  313. 313.

    Redshift

    @Yarrow: In the longer quote Harwood also posted, Dershowitz referred to it as “social profiling,” in a misguided attempt to sound less pathetic by pretending it’s like racial profiling, instead of just that people have no obligation to associate with you if you’re defending a monster.

  314. 314.

    NotMax

    @Ruckus

    Am a family of one as well and do 95% of my food shopping there. 3% at the still new here Target (consistently best priced Peet’s coffee, excellent prices for staples such as flour and sugar), the remaining 2% split among different stores which I don’t frequent much at all (such as an open to the general public store which caters to the restaurant trade and has a wide selection of Asian items, as well as ridiculously low prices* for things such as aluminum roasting pans and the like).

    That said, I only go grocery shopping once per month.

    *Price comparison – $4.99 or higher for a single aluminum roasting pan at the supermarket, 79¢ at the other store.

  315. 315.

    Major Major Major Major

    @J R in WV:

    People write fiction with a president selling out to a hostile foreign power, how is that realistic?

    Hell, my book makes more sense than that, and my book doesn’t even make sense!

    Thanks again for the help!

  316. 316.

    frosty

    @? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?:

    I guess I’ll just have to suck it up one of these days.

    Yep. I’ll give you Heinlein’s Rules:
    1 You must write.
    2 You must finish what you write.
    3 You must not rewrite except to editorial order.
    4 You must put it on the market and keep it on the market until sold.

    I failed at #2. Good luck to you!

  318. 318.

    dww44

    @Sister Golden Bear: My condolences. My father-in-law died on his only grandson’s birthday in 2001. My Mom died at 2 a.m. on the day after my birthday. I think she stayed alive those couple of hours so that I wouldn’t always be sad on my birthday. I well understand all the mixed feelings you’ve had on this day.

  320. 320.

    Major Major Major Major

    @frosty:

    Heinlein’s Rules[…] 3 You must not rewrite except to editorial order.

    That explains some things.

  324. 324.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Redshift: Dershowitz referred to it as “social profiling,” in a misguided attempt to sound less pathetic by pretending it’s like racial profiling,

    /scene from a Vineyard den as a party is planned/ ‘Honey, you said he’d be interesting after we watched that movie, but he wasn’t, he’s just tedious and overbearing and picks all the cashews out of the mixed nuts, and anyway I thought you meant the Jeremy Irons character. We’ve kept him on the list to avoid a fuss, but really, at this point …..’

  325. 325.

    danielx

    @Yarrow:

    Harvard’s Alan Dershowitz says defending Trump has made him a discrimination victim: “I have experienced this firsthand on Martha’s Vineyard. Old friends are shunning me and trying to ban me from their social life.”— John Harwood (@JohnJHarwood) July 2, 2018

    Can’t think why the Onion is even publishing at this point. Self-parody, thy name is Alan.

    I have rarely read anything said with more self absorption and less self awareness.

  326. 326.

    Major Major Major Major

    @danielx:

    I have rarely read anything said with more self absorption and less self awareness.

    Dave Weigel noted on Twitter that it sounds like Morrissey lyrics.

  328. 328.

    frosty

    @Major Major Major Major: LOL. Nevertheless, I’d consider a bunch of rewriting to fall under #2, finishing what you write. It isn’t finished until you’re either happy with it or weary of trying to fix it. #3 says stop there unless the editor you’re selling it to wants changes. Whether that’s what Heinlein meant ….

    I do better with reports and papers for work than fiction. I can get to #3 and if they accept it, then it’s #4, even though there’s no payment.

  330. 330.

    danielx

    @Steve in the ATL:

    Why are there never Episcopalian revolutions? Think of the single malt scotch, the French wines, the boeuf bourguignon–no raisin-infested potato salad!

    And social order. Episcopalians are big on social order.

  331. 331.

    Redshift

    I’ve had more medical adventures myself lately. Right now I’m waiting to pick up my sweetie at the airport, but I’ll tell the tale when I have more time.

  332. 332.

    danielx

    @NotMax:

    That too. Poor man, was he expecting actual civility, now?

    Edit: I am sure that under normal circumstances the denizens of Martha’s Vineyard are very civil. Given their socioeconomic strata, what do they have to be uncivil about, restaurant choices and seating? But alas, these are not normal times and circumstances, and I don’t imagine Trump fans are thick on the ground on the Vineyard.

  336. 336.

    efgoldman

    I go away for an hour or so, and we’re still in the same fucking thread?
    Front pagers all get arrested?

  337. 337.

    Mike J

    @Major Major Major Major:

    accept the rest of the conspiracy. E.g., the computer from The Moon Is A Harsh Mistress.

    Remember what al-Qaeda meant? Some people said, “the base.” Some said it was “the database”, the list of would-be martyrs that OBL had. Of course a computer is the best way to compartmentalize the conspiracy.

  341. 341.

    Ruckus

    @NotMax:
    Considering where you live I can see that I might make the same decision about shopping there.
    However here in the land of fruits and nuts, we have a lot of choice and some of those choices I make because I can walk there. Costco, I have to drive about 12-14 miles to the closest although there is one on the way to work that is about 15 miles. Also for what I buy, strangely enough Whole Foods is very price competitive and walkable. Target is not price competitive in anything I want, at least every time I’ve compared. The big chains here aren’t bad for most things but consolidation has been happening over the last few years and that can put a damper on pricing. We also have 2 major chains of supermarkets catering to the latino world. I used to shop in one of them a lot when I lived in a different part of LA and the quality, variety and pricing is good. Especially if you cook a lot of Mexican specialties, the butcher sections are amazing.

  342. 342.

    Ruckus

    @dww44:
    My sister passed on our mom’s 90 th birthday. We had a party in her hospice room, all her friends, mom of course…. I stayed on after most everyone else left, talked for a few minutes, she said she was tired, I left, she was gone in about 15 minutes. Cancer got her. I’ve had the pleasure of cancer, as did mom. So the obligatory, FUCK, Fucking Cancer.

  343. 343.

    Ruckus

    @NotMax:
    I believe if you look in the dictionary under WATB you will find a picture of Alan D. and the explanation that he is only one of the more notable examples. And it has been thus for a number of years.

  345. 345.

    Davebo

    @NotMax: In the oven? On 4th of July? Blasphemy!

    In the Big Easy oilless fryer is the only way to go. And I’m doing a 5 rib roast. And no garlic slipped into slits on the top and sides? Crazy!

    Can’t believe I let you lure me into watching a video on how to ruin a $140 piece of beef!

    Go to your room and don’t come back till you appreciate rare meats prepared well!

  346. 346.

    TriassicSands

    @Ruckus:

    I’ll bet Dershowitz taped “Kick Me” signs on his own back in middle school so he could whine about being a victim when someone did kick him. Anything for attention.

  349. 349.

    Ruckus

    @Calouste:
    A privileged, protected and well paid class. They want it all and can’t understand why people aren’t lining up to award it to them. They should keep it up for a while longer and I’d bet people will be lining up to award them with something.

  350. 350.

    Canadian Shield

    Something I never understood that I posted on blogs after Trump won: Rather than just making fun of the Alex Jones stuff…why not challenge them? Your friend is President, he can demand to see and share any Top Secret material the State has. If you think it’s a ‘Deep State’ thing…his Party also has control of the House and the Senate. Sandy Hook a false flag operation run by the Government? Obama was not born in the USA? Pizza/Child Sex ring? Crisis Actors at ?, China invented the Global Warming Hoax? FEMA Camps? Why doesn’t a Dem Congress-critter or Senator ask for an investigation and tie it onto this sort of ‘Alex Jones and his breaking news’ stuff. There are a bunch of crazy people that actually believe his crap, it seems an easy way to put them on the defensive. ‘We tried to get a Special Council to investigate the ‘False Flag Operations’ but the Republicans wouldn’t let it come to a vote.’ If nothing else, it’s some future ammunition for the next Dem Administration (maybe).

  351. 351.

    NotMax

    @Davebo

    5 lb. and $140? That’s almost 30 bucks per pound. Even at the stratosphericly priced Hawaiian meat counters, 5 lb. runs about 80 or 90 smackeroos.

    Note to self: Bring smelling salts if ever shopping in Nawlins.

  353. 353.

    Aleta

    @danielx: I read that Dershowitz column (the Hill): he says his old friends are “trying to ban me from their social life on Martha’s Vineyard” and it means that McCarthyism has come to the Vineyard. (gag)

    But start and finish he’s actually making a horrible attack on Maxine Waters, whom he blames. And instead of mentioning the serious racist death threats she got last week, he describes his willingness to suffer (the loss of dinner invites) because of his unbiased commitment to civil rights. He’s appalling.

    Rebecca Traister just wrote about Waters in one part of “Summer of Rage: White men are the minority in the United States — no wonder they get uncomfortable when their power is challenged.”

    We’re busy worrying about the humanity — the comfort and the dignity — of white men, at the same time discouraging disruptive challenge to their authority.
    (—) Just look at how freaked out the Democratic Party leadership got about California representative Maxine Waters.

    (In 1992, after the four policemen who beat Rodney King were acquitted) many in the media and local politics were quick to label the events as riots, to throw around the term “thugs.” The original violence done to King by white male agents of the state — and the lack of consequences they faced — was practically forgotten, while black fury in response to the toleration of police brutality was framed as the only violence being done.

    Waters was then in her first term as a congresswoman, representing part of the South Central Los Angeles neighborhood where the unrest was unfolding.

    Waters (…) recognized that the unleashed fury of an oppressed people is a form of political rebellion, one not so distant from the revolution that led to the creation of the United States.

    But so electric was Waters’s take on insurrection, circa 2018, that leaders of her own party censured her. Senate Leader Chuck Schumer chastised Waters directly, noting that “no one should call for the harassment of political opponents” and describing such a suggestion as “not American.” (It is, in fact, deeply American; see again, the American Revolution.) House Leader Nancy Pelosi also chimed in, calling the “lack of civility” of protesters “predictable but unacceptable.”

    Neither Pelosi nor Schumer defended Waters against the implicit threat in a tweet sent by the president, in which he called Waters “an extraordinarily low IQ person” and accused her dishonestly of advocating “harm to [his] supporters,” concluding with the grim admonition “Be careful what you wish for Max!”

    To publicly rebuke a black woman’s support for protest and not the powerful white patriarch’s thinly veiled call to violence against her is to play on the very same impulses that Trump himself plays on: racist and sexist anxiety about noncompliant women and nonwhites, and the drive to punish them. 

    It’s one thing that Waters’s opponents on the right have casually referred to her as “unhinged” and that Fox News host Eric Bolling once told her to “step away from the crack pipe,” but that her own colleagues fall into casting her as too much, as too combative and fearsome, is a goddamn travesty.

    On Wednesday, Vermont Independent and left-wing hero Bernie Sanders came out on the side of civility, arguing that Trump officials had “a right to go into a restaurant and have dinner” without being harassed. That Sanders, a man who made his name by channeling the righteous rage of the 99 percent, a politician who was credited, along with Donald Trump, in 2016 for his ability to hear, respect, and channel the fury of the electorate … is now throwing water on another kind of righteous rage, is pretty rich.

    These people had nice dinners in restaurants interrupted. They did not have their children pulled from their arms, perhaps forever; they were not refused refuge based on their country of origin or their religion or the color of their skin; they were not denied due process; nor were they denied a full range of health-care options, forced to carry a baby against their will, separated from their families via the criminal justice system, or shot in the back by police for the mere act of being young and black.

  355. 355.

    Misterpuff

    Of course we’re not having a Civil War,

    However, we will be participating in an Uncivil War Reenactment where Libs kick Confederate and Nazi Ass with a side of Hun Heinie for dessert.

  358. 358.

    jl

    The Deep State screwed up the surprise July 4 Civil War again!!??
    WTF. I’m done with those incompetent losers.
    My grandpa told me when the Trilateral Commission could get shit done. Those were the days.

  359. 359.

    J R in WV

    @Sister Golden Bear: There is no hurry about dealing with the estate. Tell your brother to just wait for you to be ready.

    Have the CPA work on the taxes and the valuations while you’re — but tell them to be prepared not to file a thing until you’ve had a chance to go over everything on your own.

    Time is not important in this matter. Best of luck with your planned surgery~!!~ Take care and keep in touch…

  361. 361.

    Sister Golden Bear

    @J R in WV: Thanks, it’s more about dealing with her possessions. In theory, we’ve got 30 days to clear out her apartment at the retirement community, although they’ve since indicated there’s some flexibility, and my brother and I agreed that if needed, we’d see if we can just pay rent for an extra month of two, or else put things in storage temporarily until we can deal with them. (Neither of us living near her complicates things.)

    I agree, there’s no rush on the financial estate, and I’ll probably take the lead on that when I get back, since I’m the first executor. (Had to put together a notarized letter officially resigning as executor so my brother can handle things while I’m out of the country. When I get back, he’ll resign and appoint me as the successor executor again.)

  362. 362.

    Robert Sneddon

    @? ?? Goku (aka Amerikan Baka) ? ?: The Lord D’arcy stories by Randall Garrett are an interesting and rather fun series of stories, murder mysteries set in a world a bit like today’s but where magic exists and science is regarded in much the same way we regard alchemy today. The Talented can use magic, regulated by the Church in Britain and France under the rule of a Plantagenet King — the turning point in history was that Richard III survived his wounds, John Lackland was never king and magic was discovered and codified at that time.

    The primary character is Lord D’Arcy, a Hercule-Poirot-level detective aka King’s Investigator who is accompanied and assisted by Master Sean O’Loughlainn, a forensic sorceror. One of the stories even reprises Agatha Christie to the point of being called “Murder on the Napoli Express”. Excellent reads with a lovely bit of world-building in the background.

  364. 364.

    Matt McIrvin

    @Mike J:

    Remember what al-Qaeda meant? Some people said, “the base.” Some said it was “the database”, the list of would-be martyrs that OBL had.

    Some said it was really “The Foundation” and they were science-fiction nerds referencing Asimov. Probably not true, though.

  366. 366.

    Matt McIrvin

    @efgoldman: In hindsight, Ron Paul’s 2012 movement and the weird support it got from some leftists prefigured the Bernie-or-Buster hard left’s preference for Trump over Clinton. Not large in terms of votes, but it was close enough that weird media phenomena like that could have been significant.

  367. 367.

    Just One More Canuck

    @Yarrow: what he meant to say was “my defending trump has made everyone realize what an asshole I am”

  370. 370.

    http://geometrydashdownload.co/

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