Get Into the Holiday Spirit Early With 26 Quotes from 'A Christmas Story'

While some stories can get old fast, A Christmas Story isn't one of them. Based on Jean Shepherd's book In God We Trust: All Others Pay Cash, the classic Christmas movie from the '80s tells the tale of Ralphie Parker, a 9-year-old boy who wants "the holy grail of Christmas gifts:" an official Red Ryder, carbine action, 200-shot, range model air rifle...not exactly what we had on our Christmas wish list growing up, but that's part of what makes Ralphie so special. Get into the holiday spirit with over 20 memorable A Christmas Story quotes...we triple-dog-dare ya!

A Christmas Story quotes

Santa Claus quotes

1. "You'll shoot your eye out, kid."

Schwartz quotes

2. "I triple-dog-dare ya!"

Ralphie Parker quotes

3. "Some men are Baptists, others Catholics; my father was an Oldsmobile man."

4. "Be sure to drink your Ovaltine. Ovaltine? A crummy commercial? Son of a b*tch!"

Related: See the Cast of A Christmas Story Then and Now

5. "He had yellow eyes! So help me God! Yellow eyes!"

6. “We plunged into the cornucopia quivering with desire and the ecstasy of unbridled avarice.”

7. "In our world, you were either a bully, a toady, or one of the nameless rabble of victims."

8. "Another shot of mysterious, inexorable, official justice."

Related: Zack Ward Shares His Favorite Memory from Making A Christmas Story

9. "Every family has a kid that won't eat. My little brother had not eaten voluntarily in over three years."

10. "Of course. Santa. The big man. The head honcho. The connection."

11. "Only one thing in the world could've dragged me away from the soft glow of electric sex gleaming in the window."

12. "Adults loved to say things like that but kids knew better. We knew darn well it was always better not to get caught."

13. "It was the classic, mother BB-gun block. 'You'll shoot your eye out!'"

14. "Aunt Clara had for years labored under the delusion that I was not only perpetually 4 years old, but also a girl."

15. "Oh my god, I shot my eye out!"

Related: Here's Hallmark's Full Lineup of New Christmas Movies for 2023

16. "Was there no end to this conspiracy of irrational prejudice against Red Ryder and his peacemaker?"

17. "Only I didn't say, 'Fudge.' I said THE word, the big one, the queen mother of dirty words, the 'F-dash-dash-dash' word!"

18. "It was soap poisoning."

Randy Parker quotes

19. "Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double beatloaf. I hate meatloaf."

20. "I can't put my arms down."

Related: 30 Quotes From How the Grinch Stole Christmas That Will Cheer You Up, Because, It's Christmas!

Old Man Parker quotes

21. "He looks like a deranged Easter Bunny."

22. "Nadafinga!"

23. "He looks like a pink nightmare!"

24. "You used up all the glue on purpose!"

25. "Fraa-jeel-aay! It must be Italian!"

26. "That son of a b-tch would freeze up in the middle of summer on the equator!"

Spread some Christmas cheer this holiday season with these Elf quotes.