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Am I in the wrong?
Yesterday, I had a friend come into town that I hadn’t seen in 5 years. We went out for a late dinner and I got home at midnight.
When I got home my partner was livid, saying that I was being irresponsible for being out so late and that all I think about is me and not the baby (I’m currently 19 weeks). Then he went on to say that I don’t have the energy to stay out that late, cause we had been running around all day, and lack self awareness to realize I was running on adrenaline and how I’m putting the baby at risk with my irresponsible behaviour, then continued on that track saying how horrible I was.
When I’m home I usually go to sleep around 10/11pm. The last couple weeks are the first time I haven’t been exhausted during this pregnancy. Just wanted to get some other perspectives on if it was wrong of me to stay out that late or not.
That sounds ridiculous to me. I go to bed around 1am every night. Your partner sounds controlling. I would just let him know the occasional late night won’t hurt, and you’ve been having more energy lately and trying to enjoy it.
Honestly it sounds ridiculous to me…. If he’s that worried about the baby he should know better than to cause you stress by getting upset with you ��♀️
He sounds controlling. It’s one thing for him to say to you “hey babe are you sure you felt ok to stay out so late? I just want to make sure you and our baby are ok”… but he was livid and freaked out on you. You deserve a night out to yourself. Especially when you haven’t seen your friend for years. He overreacted big time and it’s quite scary. I’m wondering if he has other behaviors like this.
I would be frightened if my partner treated me like this. It’s one thing to voice concern if staying out late night not be good for baby, but to reprimand you like that is a little crazy. Also, if you plan to have more kids and you get pregnant again, is he going to take care of your child by himself so “don’t be wear yourself out” �� it seems a bit over the top that he got upset about one late night. I have been up until midnight multiple times the past few weeks catching up on work and my husband has not scolded me for not caring about our child I’m carrying .. I’ve also been up for hours numerous nights the past months caring for our toddler when she only wants momma in the middle of the night. I’d def have a talk about boundaries and that pregnancy doesn’t make you disabled.. is he always controlling or does he suffer from anxiety? It may get worse the further along you get or even after the baby is here ��
Does he act like this often about things? If not, he was probably just super upset and jealous that he couldn’t be out with you and he stewed on it for hours then just lost it on you when you made it in. Either way, not great. You’re not a child or teenager
he doesn’t act like this ever. I don’t think I’ve seen him this mad in the 11 years we have been together.
that’s good then, he probably was just really upset and didn’t know how to communicate how he was feeling in a more productive way. So he blew it out of proportion, it’s still not fair of him and it’s not an excuse either. You are not in the wrong!
until he is the one carrying around a baby and experiencing the energy or lack of within that body then he needs to shut his mouth.
the way I would have zero patience for that absolute nonsense.
You’re not wrong! When the baby gets here you won’t have that luxury anymore for a while, and it’s good for your mentals to see friends and get out of the house. A stressed out and homestuck mama isn’t good for baby either. We’re already limited so much in what we can do, I’d make a point to tell him that it’s important for you to enjoy the things you can. If you communicated with him what your plans were I can’t see why he should be mad, it’s not like you were out doing circus auditions or something strenuous.
he’s in the wrong for trying to tell you how much energy you have, also it’s a little ridiculous to say you’re running on adrenaline during dinner, that’s not really how that works. He’s irresponsible for trying to make you feel bad or guilty.
Feels very controlling to me. Absolutely not wrong of you at all and you should have zero shame about it.
You’re not wrong … if you felt you were able to handle it only you know your body and what it can and can’t handle!
I think your partner is over reacting
aliyahhbx
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