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Key points
- The vast majority of women say that clitoral stimulation, alone or coupled with penetration, is their most reliable route to orgasm.
- A new study revealed four strategies women use to enhance their pleasure during penetration, and three of the four involved clitoral stimulation.
- The vaginal opening and part of the vaginal canal contain touch-sensitive nerve endings, and many women enhance pleasure by focusing there.
- This study's findings of what women do to enhance pleasure during penetrative sex run counter to porn images of sex.
What people like sexually is quite varied. Still, thanks to science, we can make informative generalizations. As one example, research reveals that the vast majority of women don't orgasm from penetration alone. Likely you’re wondering what “the vast majority” means. One oft-quoted statistic is that only 25-30 percent of women orgasm during intercourse. But, as pointed out by a scholar who analyzed the studies that came up with this statistic, most don’t differentiate between women who can orgasm from just a thrusting penis and women who orgasm during intercourse by making sure their clitoris is also stimulated. When this differentiation was made in two recent surveys (one conducted by a magazine and the other published in a scientific journal), only 15-18 percent of women say they orgasm from thrusting alone. The numbers decrease further when I ask my students about their most reliable way to orgasm. Here’s what thousands of my female students say their most surefire route to orgasm is:
Taking out the 19 percent who don't orgasm, 96 percent of women say their most reliable route to orgasm involves external clitoral stimulation, either alone or coupled with penetration.
As detailed in the anatomy chapter of my book, Becoming Cliterate, that's because the external clitoris contains a copious amount of touch-sensitive nerve endings. Other parts of the external female genitalia (the vulva) that contain these same erotic touch-sensitive nerve endings include the inner lips and the vaginal opening. The first third of the vaginal canal also includes many touch-sensitive nerve endings.
This doesn't mean the inner two-thirds of the vaginal canal is insensitive to sexual stimulation. This part of the vagina includes pressure-sensitive nerve endings, explaining why many women like the feeling of a penis or sex toy in their vagina, especially when already aroused and for many, when simultaneously getting external clitoral stimulation.
Maybe you're wondering why I keep mentioning external clitoral stimulation. It's because the clitoris has both external and internal parts. As explained in another post, the front wall of the vaginal canal is actually inextricably linked to the internal clitoris, making it impossible to stimulate the vagina without also stimulating the internal clitoris.
What does all this mean for how women experience vaginal penetration? Sadly, according to the World Health Organization, 8 percent to 21 percent of women experience pain during penetration. This pain can be due to not being aroused enough prior to intercourse or due to a medical issue (so if you are experiencing this, please see a sexual medicine physician). Nevertheless, countless women greatly enjoy intercourse, finding it an arousing (sometimes orgasmic) and incredibly intimate way to connect with a partner. And now we now have a published study, from an OMGYES Pleasure Report, on what women do to enhance sexual pleasure and orgasm during penetration.
The authors of this study interviewed over 4,000 women from around the world and found four distinct patterns women use to enhance their pleasure during penetrative sex. They then conducted another study with over 3,000 American women, ranging in age from 18 to 93, to see how often these techniques were used. Here's what they found:
- About 70 percent of women stimulate the clitoris with a finger or sex toy at the same time that the vagina is being penetrated (called "pairing" by the researchers).
- About 76 percent of women rock the base of a penis or sex toy so it rubs against the clitoris constantly during penetration (called "rocking" by the researchers).
- About 84 percent of women focus on penetration just inside the entrance of the vagina (called "shallowing" by the researchers).
- About 88 percent of women rotate, raise or lower their pelvis/hips during penetration to adjust where the toy or penis rubs (called "angling" by the researchers). According to the study authors, this angling could be used to make sure that the external portion of the clitoris was being stimulated or to adjust where the penis or toy makes contact inside the vagina (which recall responds well to pressure and is inextricably linked to the internal clitoris).
The results of this study tell us what many women already know and that is, even during penetrative sex, the clitoris is key. Indeed, three of the four techniques involve making sure one's clitoris is being stimulated. The one technique that women reported using that didn't involve clitoral stimulation (shallowing) involved stimulating the previously mentioned touch-sensitive nerve endings around the vaginal opening and in the inner third of the vagina.
The findings of this study run counter to porn images of women having intense orgasms from thrusting penises. Instead, they provide a more realistic picture of what women do to enhance their pleasure during penetration.
It's high time that women feel empowered to get the clitoral stimulation they need for pleasure and orgasm, whether that be alone or coupled with penetration. Indeed, while this study focused on pleasure during penetration, it's essential to recall that for some women orgasm is easiest achieved through clitoral stimulation alone. Again, some women's most reliable route to orgasm is clitoral stimulation plus penetration and for others, it's clitoral stimulation alone. Very few women say they most reliably orgasm from just penetration.
Yet, due to false media images, as a sex therapist and educator, countless women have told me that they feel broken when they don't orgasm from penetration alone. Hopefully, the results of this study will help alleviate such baseless concern and instead, in the words of one of the study's authors, bring "... this important knowledge out of the shadows into the light of day with clear language" to "empower women to better recognize, communicate and act on what they want."
