The courage to speak your truth: Shantelle Bisson on breaking stigmas around what it means to be female

For International Women’s Day, we sat down with mother, producer, and author Shantelle Bisson to talk about female equality and how being unafraid to speak your truth is one way women can stand-up and stand-out.

You’ve done a lot in your life and career - from raising 3 kids, to supporting charitable causes, to now publishing a book on parenting! Which of your many accomplishments have been the most meaningful to you?

This is a question that always stumps me. Picking only one of my accomplishments and labeling it as “the most meaningful” they all hold different places in my heart for their importance in molding me into the woman that I am today. But if I were to put them all in front of me and go over them one by one, I’d have to say raising my girls into incredible thoughtful, kind, loving, caring global citizens is top pick. Motherhood wasn’t on my list of things to do, because quite frankly I wasn’t sure I could be a good mother; and as it turns out I didn’t suck at it after all.

The theme for International Women’s Day is achieving a gender equal world. Can you tell us about a time where you felt disadvantaged because of your gender?

I’d have to say that while I was acting I always felt disadvantaged for being a female. There were always multiple roles for men to every one role for me. It was then, and even now, still remains an industry heavily skewed in the favor of men. Which is why I left it behind and became an entrepreneur and author. I can make my own rules and create a business, like my marina, Shantilly’s Place that benefits from me being female.

I love that you saw a gap in the industry and decided to create a space for yourself that was unaffected by gender. How do you personally stand-up for yourself to make sure that you are represented the way you would like to be seen by the world?

The way that I stand up for myself and to ensure I’m being represented the way I want to be seen in the world is to make sure that my voice is my authentic voice. I don’t censor myself for any reason, certainly not because I may come across as a “bitch” to male readers, or followers. I don’t shy away from conflict with men either, a lot of women will water down their opinions, their feelings, and even their sexuality so as not to offend. That’s not me. I speak my truth, respectfully, but clearly, and always.

Shantelle Bisson with her husband Yannick Bisson.

I love that. It’s so important to own who you are. What barriers do you think women still need to overcome?

I think we still need to overcome fear of how people will see us, or what they will think of us if we speak our truths. If we’re vocal with our needs and ideas of how we want to be treated and what we want to see in the world I believe we still worry that we won’t get the promotion, or the man. So many women are still curating their identities to be “accepted” and I think we would all get further ahead if we respectfully demand that we be seen, heard and respected exactly as we are. I also think women are going backwards in many ways, or at least on the internet it comes off that way; with all the woman shaming that happens out there, honestly some women need to turn off their phones and go work at a women’s shelter to gain some perspective on how wonderful we all are and how we need to be building one another up, and not tearing one another down. The woman shaming is a trend that I would love to see come to an end.

Who are your female mentors and what role have they played in shaping who you are?

My mother for sure is a mentor of mine. She was a single mom, keeping three kids with a roof over their heads, and in activities that we were passionate about, that fed our souls and kept us out of trouble. I have to say that she taught me the importance of giving a child what they need to thrive, while not spoiling us. She taught me how to have good work ethic and to respect everybody around me by teaching me that unless I’ve walked a mile in somebody’s shoes I have no idea what their life journey is all about. My three daughters are definitely mentors to me, because they’ve taught me to be kind, patient, gentle, and loving. They’ve shaped me into a woman who is giving and cares about the world at large, which I have to say I am not entirely sure I would have had that desire to make my world a better place if their futures weren’t hinging on it. And finally every single close girlfriend that has come, and stayed, or come, and gone has taught me the meaning of loving another woman unconditionally, and how to be a shoulder to lean on or somebody to laugh until we cry with.

What advice do you have for other women who are looking to lead successful and happy lives?

My advice for other women who are looking to lead successful and happy lives is quite simple; take time for yourself. It’s not selfish to put yourself first, workout, meditate, journal, have long soaks in the bath, spend time in nature alone. Whatever feeds your soul so you can feed the souls of those you love. Create balance in your life. Don’t live a life that is all about the hustle, and rushing through this one beautiful life you’re given. Literally take time to do nothing, enjoy moments of quiet and boredom. Slow down, you will lose nothing; but you will gain inner peace, health and joy. Life is not a sprint, it’s a marathon, so pace yourself; and enjoy the views along the way.

Any words to live by?

I always tell my girls this, and my girlfriends who are in the middle of a struggle, or a life cross roads: “Life is both simultaneously too short, and too long to spend it not living your passion.”

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This interview was conducted by The Blissed Team.

This article was published March 6th, 2020.