Ralph Ineson: ‘You probably get one commercial for 20 utter humiliations’

Born in Leeds, Ineson, 48, was a teacher before he became an actor. He played Chris Finch in The Office from 2001 to 2003, and Amycus Carrow in three Harry Potter films. His other work includes Game Of Thrones, and upcoming films Hurricane Heist, Steven Spielberg’s Ready Player One and Absentia. He is married with two children, and lives in London.

When were you happiest?
I am pretty happy right now. I have just got back from a dog walk. I have loads of nice work coming out. I am feeling pretty chipper.

What is your greatest fear?
Losing my family.

What is your earliest memory?
My granddad was not a tall man but he weighed about 27 stone and my first memory is crawling across his belly. I remember it being a journey.

Which living person do you most admire and why?
Steven Spielberg. I can’t think of many people who have improved the human experience as much as that one man.

What was your most embarrassing moment?
At castings for commercials, you end up being told to do ridiculous things, such as animal impersonations. You probably get one commercial for 20 utter humiliations.

Property aside, what’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought?
Diamonds for my wife.

What is your most treasured possession?
Grayson, a one-year-old Great Dane. He makes me laugh 10 times every day.

If you could bring something extinct back to life, what would you choose?
My six-pack.

What is your most unappealing habit?
When I am stressed I pluck my beard, leaving bald patches.

What is your favourite smell?
Gun oil. It reminds me of my dad, who used to shoot. There’s a barracks at the bottom of my road. You can tell when they’re cleaning weapons because you smell the oil. It’s a lovely smell.

Which book changed your life?
Ironically, as I am an atheist, it was the Bible.

What did you want to be when you were growing up?
A Yorkshire cricketer, but I wasn’t good enough.

What is your guiltiest pleasure?
Country music – and not even the cool stuff. I love Tammy Wynette and Dolly Parton.

To whom would you most like to say sorry and why?
My kids, for the jokes. Some of them are pretty bad.

What was the best kiss of your life?
Chris O’Dowd’s arse on The IT Crowd.

When did you last cry, and why?
On New Year’s day I was so hungover my hair actually hurt. I lay on the sofa with my daughter and we watched The Muppets for two hours and I cried with laughter.

What single thing would improve the quality of your life?
Leeds United signing a decent striker.