Portia de Rossi Is More Than Just Ellen DeGeneres' Wife! All About the Actress Who Stole the Comedienne's Heart

Author:
Jessica Sager
May 12, 2021

Ellen DeGeneres has had a colorful history in the spotlight in terms of her love life: She publicly came out in 1997 on Ellen and soon after had a highly-publicized relationship with actress Anne Heche. After they split, she dated photographer Alexandra Hedison for three years—until, that is, DeGeneres met her soulmate in wife Portia de Rossi.

“We just really love each other’s company,” DeGeneres told Parade in 2011.

But tabloids have a tendency of doubting that, for some reason. "We’ve been followed recently by the paparazzi, and we found out it’s because there’s a story out there that we’re getting divorced. We don’t know why," DeGeneres told Parade in 2016. "We’re together all the time. We genuinely love each other. Her happiness is my happiness, and vice versa. True love is caring more about the other person’s happiness than your own."

Get to know Ellen DeGeneres' wife Portia de Rossi and learn about their sweet love story.

What is Portia de Rossi's real name?

De Rossi was born Amanda Lee Rogers. She legally changed her name when she was 15 years old, inspired by the character Portia from The Merchant of Venice.

"I picked Portia because I was a Shakespeare fan, de Rossi because I was Australian and I thought that an exotic Italian name would somehow suit me more than Amanda Rogers," she told The Advocate. "When you live in Australia, Europe is so far away and so fascinating, so stylish and cultured and sophisticated."

After tying the knot with DeGeneres, she legally took the comedienne's last name.

Portia de Rossi is an accomplished actress

De Rossi is plenty famous in her own right. The Australian stunner started in the entertainment business as a model, but her passion was acting. She got her big break in 1995 on the series Too Something. Though it only lasted a single season, she made enough of an impression to get cast on Nick Freno: Licensed Teacher the following year. Her biggest breakout role was as Nelle Porter on Ally McBealfrom 1998 to 2002. (Not only did she play a lawyer on TV, but she actually deferred law school to become an actress, so the role was likely extra special to her.)

In 2003, de Rossi landed a starring role in Arrested Developmentas Lindsay Bluth Fünke. She's also had arcs in series including Scandal, Nip/Tuck, Veronica's Closet, Better Off Ted and Santa Clarita Diet.

On the big screen, de Rossi has appeared in Scream 2, Stigmata, Who Is Cletis Tout?, I Witness and Cursed, to name a few of her credits.

Portia de Rossi was married to a man before

De Rossi was married to documentary filmmaker Mel Metcalfe from 1996 to 1999. She told The Advocate, "I actually married him, for a green card. But I didn’t get my green card through him—I couldn’t do it at the end. We had a really great, caring relationship; it just obviously wasn’t right for me."

She previously identified publicly as bisexual

Though de Rossi knew she was a lesbian from a young age, she told people she was bisexual in her early days of modeling.

"A lot of models call themselves bisexual, so I just hid behind that title for a very long time," she confessed to The Advocate. "I thought it was just so fun to be bisexual! It just suggests you’re a fun party girl—who makes out with your best friend on the dance floor. But I knew that I was gay, I knew it. I just couldn’t see myself as a gay woman, even though that’s where my heart was."

Portia de Rossi struggled with eating disorders

Though she previously spoke about her battles with anorexia and bulimia, de Rossi revealed in her memoir, Unbearable Lightness: A Story of Loss and Gain and in an interview with Oprah Winfrey that her eating disorder was even worse than anyone could have imagined.

De Rossi explained that she constantly sought "external validation" and that she was desperate to be skinny, associating "curvy" or "woman-like" with being "pudgy." She hit her lowest point in 2000, consuming a meager 300 calories per day and dropping to an astonishing 82 pounds (she's 5'7"). While filming Who Is Cletus Tout? in 2001, she collapsed on the set and finally received medical attention, upon which she was diagnosed with osteoporosis, cirrhosis and organ failure.

It wasn't until de Rossi's brother confronted her about how emaciated she appeared and how much she was exercising that she began to realize she had a problem. "I'd never seen him cry before but he just broke down and said, 'You're going to die,'" she recalled. "It kind of punctured that obsessive mind of the anorexic thinking and it made me try to get a little healthier. And, eventually, I really do credit him with turning things around for me."

Portia de Rossi stayed in the closet for years until paparazzi outed her as a lesbian

When de Rossi rose to fame on Ally McBeal, she lived in constant fear of her sexuality being revealed to the world.

"It should have been the best time of my life," de Rossi told ABC News of her time on the hit series. "It's the kind of dream job that actresses pray they get. And yet I was terrified of being exposed as gay. That was really the hardest part; all of a sudden being some kind of celebrity and being on a hit TV show. Who I was was completely unacceptable, so I had to create a character of someone I thought that people could accept."

When a paparazzo outed de Rossi with photos of her and girlfriend Francesca Gregorini, the actress was initially horrified. However, she was ultimately grateful for the experience and harbors no ill will, explaining, "[The photographer] forced me to come out to my family, she forced me to live a more honest and more open life. How can you be angry at someone who makes you more honest and ultimately a lot happier?"

How did Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi meet?

DeGeneres and de Rossi met in 2000, and DeGeneres made a huge impression on de Rossi. "I really never stopped thinking about her, because I just haven't felt that kind of energy with anyone in my life. So there's that," she recalled. They reunited at the VH1 Big In '04 Awards in (you guessed it!) December 2004. De Rossi said DeGeneres immediately "took [her] breath away."

Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi were dating other people when they first got together

DeGeneres had been in a long-term relationship with photographer Alexandra Hedison when she and de Rossi fell in love, while de Rossi and Gregorini were still together as well. That made the early days of their relationship a bit trickier to navigate than most. DeGeneres told PEOPLE, “She had a girlfriend and I had a girlfriend, but it wasn’t like, ‘Oh, we’re going to have an affair.’ We were just supposed to be together. It was a tough decision. I was physically getting sick because I was trying not to say anything. So I told Alex and she told Francesca. It was really hard to uproot everything.”

Gregorini told The Advocate that while the split was "harrowing," everyone is cool now. "I've never really talked about it, and, I want to be respectful to all the players, and, to be honest, I've definitely made my peace—Portia and I are friends, I'm friends with Ellen." She added that de Rossi and DeGeneres are "really well-matched."

When did Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi get married?

DeGeneres and de Rossi tied the knot in August 2008, shortly after same-sex marriage became legal in California and four years after they started dating. They wed at home in front of 19 guests, with Wayne Dyer officiating.

Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi are not getting divorced!

Tabloids reported trouble in paradise for the pair after de Rossi was photographed without her wedding ring, but DeGeneres dismissed it as nonsense.

“The tabloids had a photo of Portia not wearing her wedding ring. She goes, ‘I didn’t wear it because when I ride horses and I’m holding the reins, it gives me a blister!’ ” DeGeneres told PEOPLE. “The truth is, and this is corny, I fall more in love with Portia all the time. I really do. She surprises me all the time. It’s what anyone experiences when you find that person that gets you, wants to take care of you, wants the best for you. We’re really lucky because we know how rare it is.”

Portia de Rossi got Ellen DeGeneres a seriously sweet birthday present

For her 60th birthday, de Rossi gifted DeGeneres with her own gorilla conservation center in Rwanda through the Dian Fossey Gorilla Fund, as well as The Ellen DeGeneres Wildlife Fund. De Rossi announced the present on The Ellen DeGeneres Show.

"It's your 60th birthday and this gift had to be really special, and it had to represent who you are and what you really care about, not just now, but what you've always cared about, what you're influenced by and what has made you into the person you are today," de Rossi said.

De Rossi was inspired by DeGeneres' love for Dian Fossey, author of Gorillas in the Mist, and how Fossey inspired DeGeneres' animal rights activism. "It's the best gift," DeGeneres said, wiping away tears. I've always said, and when we got married Portia's line was, 'It's good to be loved, it's profound to be understood.' And she understands me, because that is the best gift anybody could have ever given me."

Portia de Rossi stood by Ellen DeGeneres amid toxic workplace allegations

Though 2020 was a tough year for just about everyone on the planet due to the COVID-19 pandemic, DeGeneres had her own specific troubles with which to cope: The Ellen DeGeneres Show came under fire for allegedly fostering a toxic work environment, and DeGeneres herself was accused of being particularly cruel, not just to her own staff, but also to several of her celebrity guests (including Mariah Carey, Brad Garrett and Lea Thompson).