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I originally bought "Hello Big Man" when it first came out in the 1980's in vinyl. It was promptly stored in my record collection with the other Carly Simon records, wedged between Bob Seger and Frank Sinatra. Maybe I played the first track, "You Know What to Do" once, wasn't particularly crazy about it, being that my taste at the time leaned more to harder rock such as Def Leppard, Ted Nugent, Aerosmith, and the Stones, and so the album sat on the shelf for 28 years, untouched except when we bought our house in 1990 and again in 2008 when we remodeled the first floor, stashing Bob, Carly, and Ol' Blue Eyes in boxes until the work was finally completed. Reinstalled in our enormous wall unit, it continued to sit unplayed in regal silence.
That all changed in late January, 2012, when I bought Stephen Davis' biography of Carly, read it, and was to put it mildly, disappointed with it, and cut it a new one in my review on Amazon.com. One positive thing: I rediscovered Carly's wonderful music, and fell for it like a ton of bricks. So I proceeded to buy all the available Carly Simon records that I didn't already own, this time as CD's (I'm not a big fan of MP3's). Since I had forgotten that I had already purchased "Hello Big Man" as a record, I bought that too. Perhaps I've become more romantic in my late middle age, about which my wife will vouchsafe, but these days, it's Carly's love songs rather than "You're So Vain" (not exactly a love song) and "Mockingbird" which appeal to me most, although Carly is one helluva rocker when she wants to be.
There is not one clunker on this CD. "You Know What to Do" has become one of my favorites, helped by the video you can watch on YouTube, which proves that it's possible to be incredibly sensuous fully (or almost fully) dressed (are you reading this, Ms. Germanotta?). Remember the difference between "sensuous" and "sensual" as explained by Mrs. Dean Wormer in Animal House: Vegetables are sensual. People are sensuous. Then there's the reggae-influenced "Menemsha" which blows me away, especially the spoken beginning and the end with Carly's then-little kids singing background. "Orpheus," about Simon's then-recent breakup with James Taylor puts a lump in my throat and a tear in my eye every time I hear it.
But there's nothing like the title track, "Hello Big Man." The song is about the courtship of Simon's late father, Simon & Schuster co-founder Richard L. Simon with his future wife, Andrea Heinemann, who worked the switchboard at S & S back in the days when they had switchboards, along with carriage rides and matinees (the latter two still exist, and I suppose it's still possible to find a switchboard somewhere). What brings the big lump to my throat, though is the faux ending. Richard Simon died quite young in 1960. They say it was a heart attack that killed him, but I suspect it was a broken heart caused by several factors more than any physical illness. Carly's mom passed too, at a relatively ripe old age of 84 or 85, but was alive and well when this song was written. I guess I must like having a lumpy throat because I listen to this track all the time in the car. As with "You Know What to Do," there's a terrific video available on YouTube, showing lots of pictures of the adorable Simon siblings as little kids. Folks, it doesn't get much better than this.
At ten times the price, this CD's undervalued. Fortunately, it's still available at the regular price.
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R. S. Stanier
A middling Carly Simon album
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 13, 2019
