100+ Funniest Laffy Taffy Jokes to Sweeten Your Day
Updated: May 06, 2024
Move over Snapple facts, and make room for these hilarious Laffy Taffy jokes!
Imagine combining two of the best parts of being a kid: sweet, sugary, stick-in-your-teeth candy and the silliest, goofiest jokes around. Actually, you don’t have to imagine it at all, because that’s what makes Laffy Taffy an enduring favorite. The chewy, bite-sized, fruit-flavored pieces of candy have had kid-friendly jokes printed on the wrapper since the ’80s. And the candies—which come in flavors like banana, cherry, strawberry and grape—are a childhood staple, largely because of the “laff” in the Laffy Taffy.
Laffy Taffy candy may have changed a bit as the company changed hands (sadly, the hot-cocoa flavor is no more), but the jokes, a holdover from the candy’s original creator, Kathryn Beich, remain the same. They’re punny, silly and the absolute best jokes for kids. After all, the jokes are written and mailed in by children!
If you want to share some of the best jokes with the little ones in your life—without risking a trip to the dentist—check out our list of the best Laffy Taffy jokes. Spoiler alert: You’ll love them too!
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Funniest Laffy Taffy jokes
- What is a magician’s favorite dog?
A labracadabrador.
- What do you call a pile of cats?
A meowtain.
- How do you get an alien baby to sleep?
You rocket.
- What did the house wear to the party?
Address.
- What can make honey and words?
A spelling bee.
- What do you call it when a dinosaur crashes his car?
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.
- How do you make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogie in it!
- What button can’t unbutton?
Your belly button.
- Why did the chicken go to the library?
To check out a bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk.
- How do social turtles communicate?
Snappy-chat.
- What do you do when your kid won’t put on shoes?
You accept de feet.
- Where do pigs park their cars?
In a porking lot.
- Why does Where’s Waldo wear stripes?
He doesn’t want to be spotted.
- Why did the reporter go into the ice cream shop?
He wanted to get the scoop.
- What is a chicken who can count her own eggs?
A mathemachicken.
- What do you call a happy cowboy?
A jolly rancher.
- What did the skunk say when the wind changed?
It’s all coming back to me now.
- What did one eye say to the other?
Between us, something smells.
- Why did the pony eat a cough drop?
He was a little hoarse.
- Why do sharks swim in saltwater?
Because pepper makes them sneeze.
Keep the family-friendly laughs going with these hilarious clean jokes.
Cute Laffy Taffy puns
- Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
He was feeling crummy.
- What’s a potato’s favorite game?
Hash-tag.
- What do sneezes wear on their feet?
Their ahhhh-shoes.
- Why was the broom late?
It over swept.
- How did dinosaurs decorate their bedroom?
With rep-tiles.
- What do sharks say when something radical happens?
“Jawesome.”
- What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
- How do you organize a space party?
Planet.
- Why should you never use a dull pencil?
It’s pointless.
- What did the digital clock say to its mom?
“Look, Mom—no hands!”
- What did the lunch lady say to Luke Skywalker?
“Use the forks, Luke.”
- How do fish get to the hospital?
In a clam-bulance!
- How do you cut the ocean in half?
With a sea saw.
- What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman.
- What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing—they just waved.
- Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was two-tired!
- Where should you go if your dog is missing?
The lost and hound.
- How do you turn soup into gold?
Add 24 carrots.
- Why do shoemakers go to heaven?
They have good soles.
There’s nothing sweeter than a good pun! Bite into our list of cookie puns that’ll make you crumble with laughter.
Laffy Taffy jokes about animals
- What did the horse say when he fell down?
“Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!”
- How do you communicate with a fish?
You drop it a line.
- What kind of shoes do frogs wear?
Open-toed.
- What did the skunk say when the wind changed?
It’s all coming back to me now.
- Why don’t lobsters share?
Because they are shellfish.
- Why do marsupials make such good tea?
It’s koala tea.
- What do you call the king’s rabbit?
The hare to the throne.
- What do you call a fancy sea creature?
So-fish-ticated.
- What do frogs order at a restaurant?
French flies.
- Why don’t birds follow directions?
They like to wing it.
- What kind of bear has no teeth?
A gummy bear.
- What did the bee say to the flower?
“Hi, bud!”
- What event do spiders love to attend?
Webbings.
- Where does a penguin keep his money?
In a snowbank.
- Why don’t ducks tell jokes while they are flying?
Because they would quack up.
- What do wolves say when they are introduced?
“Howl do you do?”
- What kind of horses go out after dusk?
Nightmares.
- Why do fish always sing off-key?
Because you can’t tuna fish.
- Why couldn’t the leopard go on vacation?
He couldn’t find the right spot!
Want more animal humor? Don’t miss these funny animal memes.
Laffy Taffy jokes about food
- When can peanuts laugh?
When you crack them up!
- Why is a pancake like the sun?
Because it rises in the yeast.
- Why did the father yell at the grape?
Because it was being un-raisin-able.
- How do you mend a broken jack-o’-lantern?
With a pumpkin patch.
- What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
- Why do bananas have to put on sunscreen?
They might peel.
- What are sailors’ favorite fruits?
Navel oranges.
- What do you call a sad strawberry?
A blueberry.
- What do cats eat for breakfast?
Mice Krispies.
- What room can no one enter?
A mushroom.
- What kind of bean can’t grow?
A jelly bean.
- Why did the man throw his margarine?
He wanted to see the butter fly.
Maybe the right food jokes for kids will actually get them to eat their vegetables. Hey, it’s worth a try!
Laffy Taffy jokes about trees
- How does a tree go home when it is ready?
It leaves.
- What is a tree’s favorite drink?
Root beer.
- What do you get when you cross a pig with a Christmas tree?
A porcupine.
- Why was the cat afraid of the tree?
Because of its bark.
- What kind of tree grows in your hands?
A palm tree.
- What’s the best way to carve wood?
Whittle by whittle.
- Why don’t trees use the train?
They can never decide on a root.
- What kind of tree survives without water?
A family tree.
For more nature jokes to share with your buds, check out these clever plant puns.
Laffy Taffy jokes about sports
- What can you serve but not eat?
A tennis ball.
- How does a cyclist train for a race?
He recycles.
- What did the pancake say to the baseball player?
“Batter up!”
- Why do bananas like gymnastics?
They like doing the splits.
- Which sport involves the most chewing?
Gumball.
- Why did the skier bring wipes?
He didn’t want to wipe out.
- Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
In case he gets a hole in one.
- What did the gum say to the taffy on race day?
“We’re in the home stretch.”
Work out your funny bone even more with these dad jokes you have to admit are really funny.
Smart Laffy Taffy jokes perfect for school
- What did the gangster say to Julius Caesar?
“You’re my Romeboy.”
- What building has the most stories?
The library.
- What is thin, white and scary?
Homework.
- What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
- Can February march?
No, but April May.
- How do billboards talk?
Sign language!
- What bow cannot be tied?
A rainbow.
- What is the biggest room in the world?
Room for improvement.
- What is always behind the time?
The back of the clock.
- What foods are good for young people?
The pro-teens!
- Where do hamsters go on vacation?
Hamsterdam.
- What did the hurricane say to the island?
“I’ve got my eye on you.”
- Do you know what’s really odd?
Numbers not divisible by 2.
- What falls down but never gets hurt?
Snow!
- What kind of tea is sometimes hard to swallow?
Reality.
- What did the music teacher say when her students asked if they could sing their favorite song?
“Of chorus.”
- Why did the GPS coordinate get kicked out of class?
He had a bad lattitude.
- Why did the student eat his homework?
The teacher said it was a piece of cake.
Looking for more crowd-pleasers? Check out these jokes for teens that will impress even the toughest crowd.
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Reader’s Digest has been telling jokes for more than 100 years, curated and reviewed over the last 20 years by Senior Features Editor Andy Simmons, a humor editor formerly of National Lampoon and the author of Now That’s Funny. We’ve earned prestigious ASME awards for our humor—including comical quips, pranks, puns, cartoons, one-liners, knock-knock jokes, riddles, memes, tweets and stories in laugh-out-loud magazine columns such as “Life in These United States,” “All in a Day’s Work,” “Laughter, the Best Medicine” and “Humor in Uniform,” as well as online collections such as short jokes, dad jokes and bad jokes so bad, they’re great. You can find a century of humor in our 2022 compendium, Reader’s Digest: Laughter, the Best Medicine. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.
Originally Published: April 30, 2021
