He’s a 10 but he loves morbius
Emma Stoned’s Tweets
Didn’t get ID’d buying wine from loblaws on a Tuesday evening 😔 I’m gonna drink about it
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I pay the bill while my date poops to establish dominance
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Wake up. Drink. Nap. Drink.
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Canuckle 129 2/6
🟨⬛🟥🟥🟥
🟥🟥🟥🟥🟥
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Playing backgammon with your fiancé before the bar is based
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Friday pick me up feat. Wadongas
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New achievement unlocked: I’ve replied to all of my texts. Please no one text me back now it will take 3-5 business days for a reply.
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Shhh nobody tell my apple watch that my only exercise minutes today were walking home from the bar
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4:44pm and I haven’t finished my coffee from 9am, fuck this day
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No masks at my healthcare job anymore… people are fucking gross and I want to live in a fishbowl please
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*exits hot tub* is this water or piss dripping from my swimsuit?
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DIY eyelash lift this morning because I’m so fucking bad at putting in my contacts
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Watching sports is only cool when they talk about ball handling
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