“Men do not bring the peace they think they do…,”

Well damn...

WdrlstUnicrn said:

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The lies.

S/N: I’m still shocked he built a career out of being a fake ass guru. I blocked him years ago and did not hear of him again until his recent scandal.

This the one.. I’m so tired of hearing people say be his peace? What about being each other’s peace? How about he takes on the role of being a leader and he brings me peace and I reciprocate. Too many of these “grown men” BOYS to want to be led.

"Blame feminism" dude is using shower curtains as window curtains and a sheet as a couch cover. If he isn't the perfect embodiement of these typical losers who can't and won't amount to shit, I don't know who is!

chocolatekis said:

This the one.. I’m so tired of hearing people say be his peace? What about being each other’s peace? How about he takes on the role of being a leader and he brings me peace and I reciprocate. Too many of these “grown men” BOYS to want to be led.

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When women are encouraged to “Be his peace” they are basically telling us to be docile and become rehabilitation centers for broken and poorly raised fatherless men. All I hear is “Don’t have an opinion, sit in the passenger seat, blindly trust his plan and leadership tactics, don’t investigate his spending habits, don’t monitor his whereabouts”. Men don’t want a woman with a brain, they want a sexy thick doormat.

I don’t like that so much of society’s relationship advice is geared towards women. Somebody has to address the root, which is the man. This is why I will never submit to a man UNLESS he CONSISTENTLY exhibits strong character, can execute on most plans, and treats me like a delicate rose. Men want too much from us internally and want us to turn around cook, clean, and split bills.

“Nah” - Rosa Parks

SuccessOne said:

When women are encouraged to “Be his peace” they are basically telling us to be docile and become rehabilitation centers for broken and poorly raised fatherless men. All I hear is “Don’t have an opinion, sit in the passenger seat, blindly trust his plan and leadership tactics, don’t investigate his spending habits, don’t monitor his whereabouts”. Men don’t want a woman with a brain, they want a sexy thick doormat.

I don’t like that so much of society’s relationship advice is geared towards women. Somebody has to address the root, which is the man. This is why I will never submit to a man UNLESS he CONSISTENTLY exhibits strong character, can execute on most plans, and treats me like a delicate rose. Men want too much from us internally and want us to turn around cook, clean, and split bills.

“Nah” - Rosa Parks

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Exactly I’m starting to believe they don’t even want women with brains or who challenge them. When you do speak up, no matter how correct u come they take it as criticism.

I’m really feeling this topic because I’ve been gaslit so much by men who don’t know themselves. They take everything as criticism or nagging unless you’re simply a doormat.

Don’t get me wrong door mat women get it just as bad as a woman that knows her worth. I.e. tiny from xscape. She lets T.I. do whatever he wants… if u know u know. And he now has her tangled up in S***** assault cases.

Me at all that.

Finally somebody said it.

And I agree the relationship advice needs to be geared towards men because they complain too much and are not the leaders they think they are. Now, women play into this too (their momma, etc) and it leads to what we have now. A mess.

Guys also need to fix themselves, heal their own hurts without a woman helping them and get it together like women are told to do.

chocolatekis said:

Exactly I’m starting to believe they don’t even want women with brains or who challenge them. When you do speak up, no matter how correct u come they take it as criticism.

I’m really feeling this topic because I’ve been gaslit so much by men who don’t know themselves. They take everything as criticism or nagging unless you’re simply a doormat.

Don’t get me wrong door mat women get it just as bad as a woman that knows her worth. I.e. tiny from xscape. She lets T.I. do whatever he wants… if u know u know. And he now has her tangled up in S***** assault cases.

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I definitely was in a relationship with someone who exhibited narcissistic personality disorder characteristics. I’m not a mental health expert so I can’t quite say that it’s a fact. He was so egotistical, manipulative, and he gaslit me so much, to keep from being responsible for his part, that it drove me up the wall. Historically, men suffer from NPD more than women according to statistics. Men lack the ability to be introspective and take true accountability for their mindset, attitude, and behaviors. They project and deflect …ALL DAY. Girl, I don’t even desire to get married because of how men are. I see why Traci Ellis Ross chose a career over a husband and children. I’m on that same path as her.

SuccessOne said:

I definitely was in a relationship with someone who exhibited narcissistic personality disorder characteristics. I’m not a mental health expert so I can’t quite say that it’s a fact. He was so egotistical, manipulative, and he gaslit me so much to keep from being responsible for his part that it drove me up the wall. Historically, men suffer from NPD more than women according to statistics. Men lack the ability to be introspective and take true accountability for their mindset, attitude, and behaviors. They project and deflect …ALL DAY. Girl, I don’t even desire to get married because of how men are. I see why Traci Ellis Ross chose a career over a husband and children. I’m on that same path as her.

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We are in the same boat. I’ve never witnessed anyone happy about kids. It’s the same speech I love my kids but I wish I would’ve waited.

The environment I come from.. marriage is foreign. My mom, her sisters, my cousins, friends from high school.. all have kids out of wedlock. With men who chose to leave. I thank god he spared me from making silly mistakes before I began to learn myself.

None of these women seem happy.. they all seem miserable in a way with motherhood based on the things they’ve said.

@TreeHuggerJD
Sorry for seemingly taking over your thread. This thread just hits home for me.

No peace whatsoever. Physically, spiritually, and emotionally taxing.

chocolatekis said:

We are in the same boat. I’ve never witnessed anyone happy about kids. It’s the same speech I love my kids but I wish I would’ve waited.

The environment I come from.. marriage is foreign. My mom, her sisters, my cousins, friends from high school.. all have kids out of wedlock. With men who chose to leave. I thank god he spared me from making silly mistakes before I began to learn myself.

None of these women seem happy.. they all seem miserable in a way with motherhood based on the things they’ve said.

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Girl, you said the truth. So many women and men don’t count the spiritual, mental, emotional, physical, and financial costs of parenthood before conception. Our community is continuing the cycle of generational curses by refusing to learn and heal from toxic patterns that the culture has normalized.

Examples of it within the black family structure:
Children out of Wedlock
Fatherless Homes
Alcoholism
Physical Abuse
Verbal abuse (BIG ONE with poor
black single mothers) - Let’s be honest…they are stressed with trying two do both parental roles alone and it impacts how they treat their children.
Lack of Education
Etc…

Can they just rap it up? The first 6 years of a child’s life sets the course for their adult experience and worldview…when you add up all those aforementioned generational disadvantages. Black kids have to fight so many odds just to be able to compete for a decent life that white kids are given earlier on.

SuccessOne said:

Girl, you said the truth. So many women and men don’t count the spiritual, mental, emotional, physical, and financial costs of parenthood before conception. Our community is continuing the cycle of generational curses by refusing to learn and heal from toxic patterns that the culture has normalized.

Examples of it within the black family structure:
Children out of Wedlock
Fatherless Homes
Alcoholism
Physical Abuse
Verbal abuse (BIG ONE with poor
black single mothers) - Let’s be honest…they are stressed with trying two do both parental roles alone and it impacts how they treat their children.
Lack of Education
Etc…

Can they just rap it up? The first 6 years of a child’s life sets the course for their adult experience and worldview…when you add up all those aforementioned generational disadvantages. Black kids have to fight so many odds just to be able to compete for a decent life that white kids are given earlier on.

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I know a person for each title. It’s sad because instead of getting their self together for their kids.. like u said, they continue the cycle.
I kind of went off topic but it all comes full circle.

That gentleman never lied. Unfortunately the ones who need the lesson will not hear or learn it.
I rather be happily single living life than to deal with the shit that comes with many men today.

I'm glad a man addressed this. He said males don't bring the peace THEY think they do which is absolutely laughable considering males only want relationships so they can benefit from the second income, use the girlfriend as a "main" while the cheat and build a roster on the side, look for submission while offering nothing but dik and average wages and a host of other exhaustingly selfish and self-serving actions.

A male friend of mine follows Kevin Samuels and agreed that women weren't approachable because some get upset when asked to smile. He claimed it was a harmless suggestion but I asked him why don't men ever ask other men to smile and why did a woman (they don't even know) have to change her appearance to make them comfortable. Of course he had no answer and I explained that the suggestion was just another way to control women in general. Men are so conditioned by patriarchy, entitlement and misogyny that they don't have the insight or awareness to see that mainstream attitudes toward women and women in relationships are toxic, yet they follow those mainstream examples. So no they don't bring peace to relationships. They are the reason relationships are no longer desirable and either don't care or are too fixated on the male superior b.s. to see it.

They're not bringing wisdom, growth or a team/ partner attitude. They're using women as validation to get cool points from other men and it's destroyed the dating scene. Males need to change, but until then at least a couple of aware men are starting these conversations amongst themselves.

TreeHuggerJD said:

I’m so happy to see men checking, and correcting other men. Also I’m am so through with men, and their toxic doormats blaming feminism for every fucking thing. They act like women are trying to take away there rights. Feminism should not stop so called men from being men. My great grandmother was born in 1913 and was a feminist, and raised her children, both girl and boys with the same mindset. She made sure her daughters knew that they did not have to align to what society says they have to be. She actually had her sons tending to the home so that they knew cooking and cleaning was not just a woman’s job. Made sure her daughters fought to have a equal education to their male, and non-black counterparts.

This was a black woman from Weir Mississippi, raising her children on a farm with her husband while also a school teacher. A school teacher who had to give half her check over to the bank because the white locals were bitter that a black woman was more certified to teach their children, than they were.
Feminisn is not a new concept, my great grandfather was not turned off by his wife assertiveness. So I’m not understanding why modern men believe feminism to be their enemy.

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No lies told.

OP what do you mean by - A school teacher who had to give half her check over to the bank

Most men aren’t worth a damn and believe that their “manhood” is currency. They wanna be in charge so bad but don’t have the emotional or intellectual capacity to do so. A man will put you in a fucked up position if you let them and then expect for you to get ya’ll out of it.

For example….

my cousin almost got caught up in hurricane Ida messing around with her husband. She was begging him to evacuate the family to Texas and he didn’t want to go, so she woke up early Saturday morning and drove her and the kids to Texas. You would think that a man‘s main focus would be on protecting his family but no, he wants to be big and bad and ride out the storm. Here it is she got the children to safety but she still has no peace of mind because she’s worried about yo dumb ass being stuck in the attic. She finally got in touch with him 24 hours later and this fool still refuses to leave Louisiana even though they may be out of power and water for weeks. I told her I wouldn’t even come back to Louisiana and make me a whole new life in Texas with my kids. His ass was wrong and instead of admitting it and running it to his family, he want to sit in the dark for weeks just to prove a point.

I think he's found a good market place to pander, during these modern times.
I'm not even mad at him.
If he's using that Money to provide a comfortable lifestyle for his Wife and kids.

I wish them all the best, during and after the Coronavirus Pandemic.

Where I notice a lot of ladies, proclaiming to not needing or wanting a "relationship" or "marriage" are calling up some of their Exes, or males they rejected in the past.
Hoping to have them help provide a comfortable lifestyle for them, during the Coronavirus Pandemic.

I guess their $tander$ have changed. LOL!!!!
I guess the Pandemic is really changing some folks $tandard$, and bringing them back to reality. LOL!!!!!

Special shout out to the Black ladies, who been treating the Black male they are in a "relationship" or "marriage" with like a person.
And working with him during and after the Coronavirus Pandemic, without being combative; and truly understanding the importance of being cooperative with each other.
Especially, during life or death situations where arguing does nothing but create more problem$.
Peace.

Reason 100000 why men deserve less.

I think a lot of them are lazy, lack ambition and come to the table feeling not up to par. We’ve taken them ANYWAY but they’re then on some secret mission to undermine and drag you down to their level. It’s like a competition they’re having (all by themselves) with you, your upbringing, your lifestyle and alllllllll the shit they admired about you that had them running behind you in the first place become weapons to stab you in the back - your education, good grammar, lack of criminal record, whatever… They get some kind of twisted satisfaction out of knocking you down a peg or two and showing you that “you’re not all that”. You HAD peace before they came but when they finally make you snap, you’re crazy. Go figure.

A lot of men are crazy entitled and are powerless in life so they try to compensate by being the "head of household" and controlling women. They were sold a lie that masculinity was about how many women a man could get and control.

Also, why is it always low status people crying about relationships? Maybe that's the issue? Lol. I swear, all this "high value" and "low value" shit is always spoken of by people who literally have very little value to anyone else. It screams over-compensation. You rarely hear actual successful, high status people talking about who's in a relationship or not or who has what value, etc.

TreeHuggerJD said:

I’m so happy to see men checking, and correcting other men. Also I’m am so through with men, and their toxic doormats blaming feminism for every fucking thing. They act like women are trying to take away there rights. Feminism should not stop so called men from being men. My great grandmother was born in 1913 and was a feminist, and raised her children, both girl and boys with the same mindset. She made sure her daughters knew that they did not have to align to what society says they have to be. She actually had her sons tending to the home so that they knew cooking and cleaning was not just a woman’s job. Made sure her daughters fought to have a equal education to their male, and non-black counterparts.

This was a black woman from Weir Mississippi, raising her children on a farm with her husband while also a school teacher. A school teacher who had to give half her check over to the bank because the white locals were bitter that a black woman was more certified to teach their children, than they were.
Feminisn is not a new concept, my great grandfather was not turned off by his wife assertiveness. So I’m not understanding why modern men believe feminism to be their enemy.

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True, and you forgot to let your male cheat and let him do whatever he wants and if you don't let him be a thot ass hoe then you're insecure and it's damn if you do and damn if you don't smh I am soo done with males.. they're fucking hypocrites..

shadowbox107 said:

I think a lot of them are lazy, lack ambition and come to the table feeling not up to par. We’ve taken them ANYWAY but they’re then on some secret mission to undermine and drag you down to their level. It’s like a competition they’re having (all by themselves) with you, your upbringing, your lifestyle and alllllllll the shit they admired about you that had them running behind you in the first place become weapons to stab you in the back - your education, good grammar, lack of criminal record, whatever… They get some kind of twisted satisfaction out of knocking you down a peg or two and showing you that “you’re not all that”. You HAD peace before they came but when they finally make you snap, you’re crazy. Go figure.

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the biggest hater every woman has ever had was a man. period

I hear you old head, I hear you. Now I'd like to see his lady/wife and/or women he's dealt with vouch for him. He can be living off his woman, be on and behind on child support, have multiple BM's, can't repair a single thing in the house etc. Yet wanna tell folks about manhood and how they should be/think when it comes to women. It's easy to parrot and pander, it's hard to be an example. I thought Derrick Jaxn would've taught you ladies that, I guess not....

raegibson said:

Most men aren’t worth a damn and believe that their “manhood” is currency. They wanna be in charge so bad but don’t have the emotional or intellectual capacity to do so. A man will put you in a fucked up position if you let them and then expect for you to get ya’ll out of it.

For example….

my cousin almost got caught up in hurricane Ida messing around with her husband. She was begging him to evacuate the family to Texas and he didn’t want to go, so she woke up early Saturday morning and drove her and the kids to Texas. You would think that a man‘s main focus would be on protecting his family but no, he wants to be big and bad and ride out the storm. Here it is she got the children to safety but she still has no peace of mind because she’s worried about yo dumb ass being stuck in the attic. She finally got in touch with him 24 hours later and this fool still refuses to leave Louisiana even though they may be out of power and water for weeks. I told her I wouldn’t even come back to Louisiana and make me a whole new life in Texas with my kids. His ass was wrong and instead of admitting it and running it to his family, he want to sit in the dark for weeks just to prove a point.

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I'm sorry for your cousin. I hope he isn't the type of man that expects her to submit to him. Who can submit to an who isn't a leader. He can't even lead his family to safety.

It should have been him leading the charge to get his family to safety. He should have made the arrangements (or at least deligated). He should have been the one driving his family to safety. His can he be comfortable with his wife and children hundreds of miles away from him? What good is he to her? She could literally do bad by herself. That's really sad. I hope she and the kids will remain safe and sound in TX.

This thread reminds me of one I saw that some men would rather complete with women than other men. Its true.