How to Get out of a Rut

Psychological Strategies to Get Unstuck

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Many of us go through periods where we're stuck in a rut. You feel like you're going through the motions at work, treading water in your relationships, or jogging in place in your social life. Things that used to excite you no longer do and, instead of moving toward your goals, you remain stagnant—stuck where you are.

Being stuck can lead to feeling both disinterested and dissatisfied. It may even cause you to want to give up on your goals altogether. Fortunately, there are a few things you can do to not only figure out why you're stuck but also to get motivated and excited about life once again.

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Signs You're Stuck in a Rut

If you're stuck in a rut, you may not even notice at first as these feelings often build slowly over time. You might follow your same routines day after day, only to one day realize that it feels less like you are working toward something and more like you're just killing time.

Here are some signs that suggest you might be stuck in a rut:

  • Every day seems the same. You might even have trouble remembering what day of the week it is. Is it Monday, or is it Friday? It doesn’t matter because your days feel indistinguishable from one another.
  • You feel like you're just trying to get through another day. Your goal is to keep putting one foot ahead of the other until the day is done. You don't feel excited or inspired.
  • You feel unmotivated. You might want to take on new projects or engage in creative tasks, but it feels like your motivation has run dry. You just can't seem to get started.
  • You feel unfulfilled. Life feels dull and boring. You want to try new things, but you don't know where to begin.
  • You want to change, but fear discomfort. You know that changing things up will make you happier in the long run but stick with the status quo because it means you don't have to risk failure or pain.

When a Rut Is More Than a Rut

Sometimes these feelings may be more than being stuck in a rut. They could also be signs of something more serious, such as persistent depressive disorder (PDD). This mild but chronic mood disorder is characterized by low mood, decreased energy, loss of interest, and loss of pleasure. If you suspect that you may be experiencing PDD, talk to your healthcare provider.

Reasons You Might Feel Stuck in a Rut

Some ruts are caused by a human tendency to make the same decision over and over again when faced with similar scenarios. You choose to drive the same way to work every day, for example. You could take another route but don't because you're naturally biased to avoid the uncertainty of the different path.

Fear of stepping outside your comfort zone can also cause you to feel stuck in a rut. You want to do something different but a fear of the unknown or a fear of failure is stopping you from taking action. To ease your fears, you do nothing at all and, instead, remain where you are.

Figuring out what's causing your discontentment is important to finding ways to get out of your rut. If you are struggling to understand the reasons behind your feelings, working with a licensed counselor or a therapist specializing in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can help.

CBT works by changing negative or unhelpful thought and behavior patterns.

When working to discover the cause of your rut, one thing to keep in mind is that not all ruts are the same. Some people might feel like they are in a rut with a romantic partner while, for others, it is their job. Even your health, family situation, friendships, hobbies, or home can contribute to these feelings.

It's important to not criticize or berate yourself once you understand the root cause. Also, don't try to minimize the issue. You might think "I have a great life" or "I don't have a right to feel this way," but these thoughts are counterproductive and can keep you trapped in a rut. While things may be "just fine" as they are, if you're not satisfied, it's time to make changes and regain your spark.

How to Get Out of a Rut

Once you've acknowledged what you're feeling, it's time to start looking for ways to get unstuck. There are a number of things you can do to break the negative cycle and move forward. Here are a few ideas to consider.

Take Care of Yourself

When you feel stuck in a rut, combat it by taking care of yourself. Self-compassion is critical to mental wellness. Start with a quick assessment of how well you've been taking care of you. Have you been eating well? Are you sleeping enough? Have you been spending time with people who care about and support you?

If something is lacking in the self-care department, now is the time to address it. Healthy food, adequate sleep, daily exercise, and social support are all essential to your physical and emotional health and wellness.

Look for ways to treat yourself a little better. Taking care of yourself ensures you have the energy to stay focused and excited about your life.

Change Your Routine

It's hard to move forward or branch out if you're engaged in the same routines day after day. People are creatures of habit and sometimes being stuck stems from boredom or feeling like you're on auto-pilot.

Look for ways to add different experiences to your day, such as:

  • Strike up a conversation. Talking to new people is a great way to expand your social connections. Plus, you will learn interesting things about the people around you.
  • Have some fun. Spending time engaged in an activity you love is good for your health. Whether it's hanging out with friends or pursuing a hobby, set aside time each week and focus your energy on having a good time.
  • Try something new. Take a new route to work, watch a new show, or sign up for a class. Exploring the world around you can add zest to your life.
  • Be spontaneous. If you're bored with your life, live in the moment. Do things that are not pre-planned, say yes to new experiences, and don't be afraid to do the unexpected.

Head Outdoors

Researchers have discovered that being in nature has a positive impact on the brain. For example, one study found that taking a walk outside reduced self-referential rumination, a behavior that can increase depression risk. Another connected nature walks with decreased depression, lower stress, and improved mental well-being.

The next time you're feeling bogged down, try going for a walk outdoors. Let go of the thoughts circling around in your brain and simply take in the world around you. Not only can being outside increase your mental wellness, but it can enhance your creativity as well.

While walking, allow yourself to relax, think of new things, and enjoy the beauty you see. This helps you return to your everyday life with a renewed sense of wonder.

Give Yourself Something to Look Forward To

Looking forward to an upcoming event or activity has a way of pulling you out of a rut and creating some excitement in your life. It puts a little pep in your step as you anticipate the fun that lies ahead.

You might look forward to the release of a movie or your favorite holiday, but you also can create these moments intentionally. Call or text friends and make plans for Friday night. Plan a vacation, even if it's just taking a day trip to a local spot. Give yourself things to look forward to and get excited about.

Even small daily and weekly rewards such as being able to go to your favorite place for lunch or tuning into your favorite TV show are great ways to build a sense of anticipation for the future.

Find Your Purpose

It's easy to fall into a rut when it feels like you're not working toward anything. Change this by setting goals related to your career or relationships. This helps you feel a sense of purpose, which is also good for boosting motivation.

Another way to develop a sense of purpose is by helping others. Look for ways to contribute to your community. Participate in your church, volunteer with a local organization. or engage in political activism. You could also help friends or loved ones with a project. Such activities give you a sense of greater purpose and meaning and are good for your mental well-being, too.

Boost Your Motivation

Sometimes getting out of a rut happens spontaneously. You might feel stuck in a rut one day, for example, then something suddenly clicks into place and the feelings vanish. In other cases, you might need to take a more active approach. One action you can take is to focus on your motivation.

Here are some ways to get motivated, even when you don't feel particularly interested or excited about what you are doing:

  • Take small steps. Pick an activity you would like to pursue, such as a new hobby or workout program. Start small with something you know you can accomplish. Don't wait for motivation or inspiration to strike—just get going. Take the first step, then another, then another. Eventually, going through the motions will be a thing of the past and you will feel involved, excited, and interested in learning more.
  • Reward yourself. Positive reinforcement is helpful when you're struggling to get motivated. Promise yourself a reward for starting a task. Then, continue to reward yourself after completing each step. Eventually, pull back on the rewards but promise yourself a larger reward once you've reached your goals. Rewards can get you started and help generate greater interest in what you are working on.

Squash Perfectionism

If you struggle with perfectionism, this can keep you stuck in the same place. No matter how hard you try, it seems like whatever you're working on is never good enough.

Squash your tendencies toward perfectionism right away and recognize that 'done' is better than perfect. In other words, rather than trying to make a project perfect, be satisfied with the fact that you completed it.

If left unchecked, perfectionism can keep you spinning your wheels for a very long time. Instead, focus on completing projects and moving forward rather than striving for perfection.

Let yourself make mistakes. Embrace the fact that you've given your best effort and move on. In time, you will be much more productive and creative when you're no longer tethered to perfectionism.

A Word From Verywell

Feeling stuck in a rut can be frustrating. But with a little effort, you can add a sense of novelty, adventure, and excitement back into your life.

If you're feeling overwhelmed by that thought, you might be experiencing something more serious. Loss of interest in things you enjoyed, difficulty feeling happy emotions, and a sense of hopelessness are symptoms of depression. If what you're feeling is more than just being stuck in a rut, talk to your care provider right away.

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Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read our editorial process to learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.
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Additional Reading

By Kendra Cherry, MSEd
Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."