PurplePillDebate is a neutral community to discuss sex and gender issues, specifically those pertaining to r/TheBluePill and r/TheRedPill.
It’s time to dispel the myth once and for all that there is any good faith concern for the well being these “innocent women” who are legal adults choosing to sleep with older men. It has been going on since the beginning of time, and I suppose bitter shrews always had something to say about it but suddenly thanks to the internet we all have to hear it.
They have come up with all of these bizarre talking points to support their fervid stance, yet they are all equally nonsensical.
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“we were that girl at one point, we know better and are trying to save them”
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“legal adult women’s brains aren’t fully developed and therefore they are incapable of making informed decisions. Only for this one specific issue though, they are perfectly capable of voting, smoking cancer causing cigarettes and going to war.”
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“men only target these women for aforementioned naivety and vulnerability, it has absolutely zero to do with this coincidentally being the time when they are at peak female attractiveness.”
https://i.ibb.co/YZ89rTV/FD39-FF6-C-3756-49-DA-A5-D6-F83322-FD4-D19.jpg
Ok then cut out the “bitter old woman” in the dialogue. It’s an easy fix.
Rock up to her parent’s house for Sunday lunch and get a feel for the climate in the room.
People only tend to get concerned when “age gap” refers to very young adults who are getting “attention” from people that are quite a bit “older”.
BTW, very few parents are going to be happy if you are an older woman rocking up for Sunday lunch with their very young adult son either.
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I’ve been in this situation many times (about 10 years gap) and the parents never cared at all. They loved me. I just have to be nice and have good intentions. If you were creepy she wouldn’t be with you anyway. Also her friends didn’t care. My friend didn’t care. No one cared.
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Same with my 8 yrs younger gf. I never had any issues with her parents.
No you haven't lol.
I’m thinking 20 + rather than 10 years, tbh.
Nah that requires nuance...
It probably won’t be that subtle :)
What business is it of a parent who their adult kids date?
Are the same parents supportive of their little angels doing onlyfans or sugar babying like you are on this forum?
Why are "Young adult women" childlike when dealing with older men, but completely empowered adults when having sex on camera or escorting?
Perhaps you have me mixed up with someone else? Personally I think that is a very hard road. I am a huge supporter of education though.
Once again, I have no idea why you think I’m arguing this. Are you absolutely sure you don’t have me mixed up with someone else?
No. But I've noticed a whole bunch of mumbo jumbo written by 20 somethings with 0 life experience...
No, I haven’t. Probably because that’s not true and young women are also disgusted by significantly older men sniffing around.
I wonder if it’s mostly due to having a platform to out these opinions.
Besides town gossip, what were the means to say you individually disapproved of something before internet and social media?
young women are disgusted by most men sniffing around, not exclusive to older men.
I feel like men find age gap relationships off as well. As a guy I don’t see an old man and a younger woman and think “that man rules”. It’s off putting. Obviously people can do what they want but the optics is off putting. Clearly money is involved, age gap relationships there is less common ground other than financial stability from the man and attractiveness from the women. It’s weird women are okay with men for money that way and it’s weird men are okay with “buying” love. They’re not relationships that last. They’re off putting.
Men and women physically age differently and their sex drives can wane differently. Around half of women lose their sex during menopause (some actually say it increases). So if you're a 50 year old guy with a bottle of viagra, you go to where the women who want sex are.
Just don’t get the viagra. If god tells your body it’s over it’s over. And women of all ages want to have sex. If they don’t want to fuck men like you that has to do with a more personal issue, you’re unfuckable.
Physiologically women get less estrogen and more testosterone as they age who can make them more horny so bringing age into is also incorrect.
Wrong on two counts.
My post based on scientific research, your post based on bullshit.
https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/how-sex-changes-after-menopause#:~:text=Half%20of%20women%20in%20their,to%20trouble%20having%20an%20orgasm.
I don’t find it off putting.. I just think “man, that guy must be loaded”
A lot of complete losers date younger people as well though. I honestly think it might be more common just less talked about by upper middle class reddit. Pretty sure my mid thirties half brother met his current girl who is like 13 years younger at whatever dead end fastfood/retail or whatever job he was holding at the time.
Seconding this. Every girl in my high school that had an older bf was dating some 20 year old drop out that went to an alternative school. He was “cool” because he was the manager at the grocery store or something.
Well-off men don’t date younger women because it’s “easier”. They can just afford to provide experiences that others would be unable to give her.
The average older guys dating younger women find the most low-self-esteem having, bad parents, low-income girl they can find that will give them a chance. Because an upper middle class young woman isn’t going to be impressed by just having a car or a job.
Nobody is "buying" anything. Often has nothing to do with money but to the extent it does its just women like men with jobs who pay their own bills. That's not and never was and never will be considered a gold digger, to want a man who can pay his own way. Young men these days a lot of them don't work and are under employed. New job study came out and more men are unemployed and not looking than basically ever before. Can't fault women for not wanting a lazy bum.
Most couples are together for each other. Financial support is all some of the older men start off as. They have less commonality since they are from different generations. What they have in common is they’re both superficial. Men likes young woman, woman likes rich guy to fund her life. That’s an off putting relationship since it’s a facade
This is not correct. If you don't know something you shouldn't pretend it's a fact it's pretty ignorant. Is this why you find older men attractive because you're a gold digger? The younger women I've dated I had alot in common with and had nothing to do with money. But your personal experience may vary it sounds like.
Generational differences make for quite a gap with commonality. Obviously there are outliers. You watch tik toks and post on social media like the newer generations do?
No, but I've noticed that it is essential to the red pill narrative that they make it seem like that's the case.
Something tells me fathers aren too happy about it either.
💀💀💀
Haha nailed it 😂 and the main people who like age gap relationships are older creepy men who want to date women much younger than themselves. We see you ;) if you were normal or as desirable as you think you are, you would have married a young woman while you were a young man, like normal people do.
That’s the lynch pin to an entire philosophy?
I don’t know
Seems like you might want to roll that back
Yes we have many documented cases of blindness, including you now.
The same blindness that insists only old bitter women care about age gap relationships despite numerous young women and men piping up that’s wrong?
Where's the perspective on age gap relationships that while it's kind of sleazy and almost always transparently superficial and immature on the part of both parties no matter what they may claim that the people who go psycho about it and claim its abuse or grooming need to shut up and let other people live their lives? That's my position.
I have the same reaction to seeing a 50 y/o man with a 24 y/o woman as I do when I hear about someone's polyamorous "throuple". I roll my eyes and cringe but don't freak out and claim someone needs to be rescued from abuse.
False.
https://datepsychology.com/is-age-gap-disapproval-a-form-of-intrasexual-competition/
Thanks for bringing up data. I also suspected something like this, young men's interest in getting exclusive access to young women is actually higher than young women's interest in getting access to old men, or old women's in getting exclusive access to old men.
Nobody really wants the majority of men at any age, and as they age, they don’t improve.
This is one of those fascinating Poe's Law type statements which could either come from a misandrist woman or a misogynist incel. Even with those two groups hating each other, they somehow manage to agree on this.
Improve at what? Most of my friends, as well as myself are in our 30s We are in better shape now, and have a ton more money and assets. If men don’t improve, there’s likely a reason behind it.
Actually it makes way more sense for young men to disapprove of age gaps more than any other group based on intrasexual competition. For one men are already engaged in more competition because eggs are scare and in higher demand compared to sperm. Why would older women especially women who are post menopause care about this? They don’t have to compete because they either already reproduced or they didn’t makes no difference now. Wasting energy competing with younger women has literally zero benefits to older women. Such women are better off investing in children they do have and or grand children then they are competing with younger women.
I don’t think this theory is as “intuitive” as we think based on what would make sense in terms of sex competition. I think it’s “intuitive” to certain men who revel in a revenge fantasy that older women will “regret” not choosing them when they were younger. The idea that older women are more upset about age gaps fuels that fantasy. Another factor could be that women disapprove of age gaps more than men at all ages so maybe they just confuse that fact for older women caring more about it. These men don’t want to admit that younger women also don’t like the age gaps because these are the women they want to date.
Yeah, studies either say that there are no differences, or that YOUNGER women approve less of age gaps.
Once again men on PPD project their nonsense onto women. What else is new? Notice how his “evidence” was a meme and yours is actual data.
Deadass
Plenty of fathers and uncles out there wouldn't want to see their daughters/nieces getting groomed either.
When trying to dispel a myth, it's conventional to prkvide some evidnce that it is, in fact, a myth.
Pick one. Do adult women have agency or don’t they
Yes, they do.
This idea keep being reiterated and men keep ignoring all young women who express concern about big age gap relationships or say they'd never date a much older partner.
I express horror at it as a young woman and it's "you're too young you don't understand"
I express horror at 30 and it's "you're old and bitter and jealous"
Sounds like they just don't want to be judged for preying on younger women
I love how 30 is old too. Lol. When I think older woman I think like 50+ not 30 haha. I really don’t get this one because 30s women also have the option of dating older men but they aren’t so that says something. I guess they have really convinced themselves that men en mass are just not interested in women over 30.
No I haven’t noticed that. But I do notice that manosphere men say that. I think they think if they say it enough it’ll be true. I think they think if they pretend many young women don’t feel the same way “as the old hags” it’ll be true. I think they pretend that a 22 year old remembers being 11, 14, and last week where some pervert 15-40 years older than her sexually leering at her because he wants young pussy. That behavior from adult males starts when girls are in 2nd grade. Or younger.
I think men like OP need to pump up this delusion because their desire for teen girls and young women is that strong.
As someone else pointed out in research here and as pointed out by u/Colt_Master here.
This observation that much older men sexually desire younger women way more than younger women sexually desire older men is also noted in dating website behavior seen below as graphed in the book Dataclysm:
Men of all ages think women much younger as in teens to ~20 y.o. “look the best.” The author of the book cut the ages off at 20 as to not highlight how low men actually prefer.
Women of all ages think men closer in age to her/no more than couple years older “look the best.” You start to see women prefer men several years younger than her when she’s over 40.
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5-6 years isn’t even an age gap unless you’re VERY young.
Woah the misinformation
How exactly would you know the identities of everyone online participating in these discussions?
No true lol. A power imbalance is a power imbalance, regardless of gender.
There are lots of good faith concerns, it’s not about gender. It’s about life stages and power imbalance. Adults are free to make their own choices, but we’re also free to judge Leo for perpetually dating a 20 year old. It’s time to dispel the myth that guys like that are cool, they’re just sad and creepy.
We didn’t like it when Draya Michelle got a man, who is the same age as her 21 or 22 year old son, and got pregnant by him, before his basketball career could peak! There’s roughly a 20 year difference between them. 🫣
Ouu or Samantha Taylor-Johnson grooming Aaron Taylor-Johnson… she was 42 when she casted and directed a 17/18 year old Aaron in a movie when she groomed him 🤢 she was married to someone else and her oldest daughter is only like 5 years younger than him… he’s like 30 now and his step daughter is 25.
Edit: also the president of France was groomed too, Emmanuel Macron. He was like 13 when he “fell in love with his school teacher” who shocker, also was married and had kids his age. His parents thought he was going to her house to hangout with the daughter his age but he was actually going there for her… they are now married… she’s 71 and he’s 46
😣
Agreed on all parts. Was debating if it was worth making this comment myself tbh but thank you for doing so aha
I’m young, and old men have been grossing me out since I was twelve or thirteen. I expect I will also be disgusted by attention from middle aged men creeping on young women until I’m also middle aged.
I just find them deluded and pathetic, why in the world do they think a young woman is sexually attracted to an old man unless he’s damn near perfect?
That first sentence 😮💨. They started grossing me out was I was fully developed at 10, with bad posture and a booty. 🙄🤦🏾♀️ puberty was the first most confusing times of my life.
Exactly! It’s just not appealing to me period
Mid-teens me loved salt-and-pepper look and dad-bods for some reason, no clue why. The idea of one liking me made me feel older and more mature and respected.
Looking back now (ten years later) and knowing what goes through the heads of the guys who would have gone for that version of me... I'm happy I was too shy to act on those stupid urges. I can't imagine what sort of mess I'd be in now if I had.
Chris Evans is almost middle-aged. He just married at 25 yrs old woman. I think they're perfect.
If only all men in their 40s looked like Chris Evans…
Rules is for normies.
Your thinking is a little off.
Age generally doesn't matter. Looks matter, but most men become less attractive as they age beyond their late 20s. So when women say they're not attracted to old guys, in reality they're not attracted to unattractive guys. It's just happens that the vast majority of old guys are unattractive. So yeah, women aren't attracted to old guys who are unattractive, which is almost all old guys, but an attractive old guy is attractive.
The only "rule" is that attractive is attractive. There's a strong negative correlation between age and attractiveness.
This means you only care about looks not age.
No, that means it’s hilarious how many guys defend age gap relationships while using handsome rich celebrities as examples of why it is successful, as if the average man about to be in his mid 40s looked as if he was from the same species as Chris Evans.
If I talked about older women in general while using Sofía Vergara or Salma Hayek as an example, most guys here would laugh at me (as they should).
I still remember how one guy on this sub tried to argue with me about how younger women prefer older men, because “Do you really think a 20 year old girl would reject Chace Crawford?”
Again, IF ONLY all men in their late 30s looked like Chace Crawford!
Or we’re rich celebrities…
Don’t worry though the red pilled virgins of today will become the Chris Evan’s’ of tomorrow if they red pill hard enough
Ugly=creepy. They deny it but comments like this prove it.
more like ugly = less chances of dating the hot young woman you think you deserve
I mean, we still have eyes and most women aren’t with men old enough to be their dads for a reason. I’m just realistic.
Exceptions don’t make the rule.
Just looked. That’s pretty gross too. He’s 42….