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Rank: Advanced Member
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'Enemies? Everyone despised him. I can't think of a man with more enemies'. I sat up. I despised my father, but I didn't like the thought of other people hating him. I don't know why. I suppose because I felt that he must be some part of me. We shared blood, and genes. And we had once shared a life, if only for a very short time. What does 'if only' mean in the above? I don't clearly understand what 'once shared a life' mean. Why type of life they shared? After birth or before? 
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Rank: Advanced Member
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=although only for a short time
The father must have been alive and involved for a short time in the son's life.
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For instance my father died when I was 8 years old, far too soon.
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I'm sorry to hear that Sarrries, I can't imagine what that was like. Yes, you can 'have a life together'. Life does not just mean a single person's existence. It can also mean a shared experience. Quote:3 WAY SOMEBODY LIVES [countable usually singular] the way you live your life, and what you do and experience during it
lead/live/have a ... life
The operation should enable Bobby to lead a normal life.
She just wanted to live a quiet life.
Having a baby changes your life completely.
The family moved to Australia to start a new life.
a life of crime/poverty/misery etc
He had been drawn into a life of crime.
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The phrase “if only” expresses a sense of regret or longing for a different outcome. In this context, it suggests that the speaker and their father had a shared life, but it was brief and fleeting. The use of “if only” implies that the speaker wishes they had more time or a deeper connection with their father, despite their feelings of despise. It’s a poignant reflection on the complexities of family relationships and the impact they leave, even in a short span of time.
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Rank: Advanced Member
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You have to be careful with that idea.
"If only" on its own does express yearning for what could have been. Loss, regret.
If only [ x had happened, then everything would have been better]
This is "if only for a short time".
It doesn't have any automatic association with yearning.
When the lights went out I was terrified, if only for a moment.
There is no yearning in that example.
Just confirming that it did happen. However short that feeling might have been, I can't pretend I wasn't scared for a moment.
In this example you might well conclude he would have liked a longer relationship. The extract does fit with that, but you can't know that from the phrase. Depending on the context there could be a range of emotions about it.
All it actually says is that they did share a life. The fact that only happened for a short time does not negate that fact.
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