[Verse 1: Seth MacFarlane & Elizabeth Gillies]
If you ever get to Calcutta say hello if you notice me near
I might as just well go to Calcutta 'cause
You certainly don't need me around here
I may look you up in Calcutta
Buzz me at the bazaar
I'll be doing an act with a snake
The next time we meet I'll be wearing a sheet
'Cause here you won't give me a break

[Verse 2: Both, Seth MacFarlane, Elizabeth Gillies]
So long baby, I packed up all of my junk
But the next time you see me
I'll be riding on an elephant's trunk
Won't you look for me in Calcutta
And I'll wave as I climb up my road
You know in your turban, you won't look suburban
At least I won't feel like a dope
You'rе gonna chase me off to Calcutta
Unless you tеll me you love me, I hope

[Verse 3: Elizabeth Gillies & Seth MacFarlane]
In Brazil, hey baby, you bugged me
When you made such a play for that chick
(She was showing me the samba)
In Spain, when your arms could a hugged me
You were teaching some floozie a trick
(I was showing her the two-step)
In Monterey, you were fickle (Never moved)
On that slow boat to China too fast
Well how about me on the Isle of Capri
When you thought of me seldom and last

[Verse 4: Seth MacFarlane & Elizabeth Gillies, Seth MacFarlane]
What, hold, baby
What, say let's call it a truce
Let's both fly to India
I been acting like a silly mongoose
We could both makeup in Calcutta
We could kiss as we climb up the road
We'll start a new tango, beneath an old mango
While watching rhinoceros elope
Our next report will come from Calcutta

[Outro: Seth MacFarlane & Elizabeth Gillies]
Unless you tell me you love me I hope
Unless you tell me you love me I hope