The Real-Life Partners of the 'Grey's Anatomy' Cast

From Ellen Pompeo and Chris Ivery to Jesse Williams and Ciarra Pardo, here are the real-life partners of the cast of Grey's Anatomy

Ellen Pompeo and Chris Ivery attends the 2018 Vanity Fair Oscar Party Hosted By Radhika Jones - Arrivals at Wallis Annenberg Center for the Performing Arts on March 4, 2018 in Beverly Hills, CA
Photo: Presley Ann/Patrick McMullan via Getty

Fans of Grey's Anatomy watch the hit TV show not just for its high-level drama, but for all the couples that break up, make up and cycle in and out of Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital.

From Meredith Grey's sweeping love story with Derek Shepherd to Jackson Avery and April Kepner's dysfunctional union, one thing Grey's Anatomy knows how to do is get the fans emotionally involved.

In real life, however, actors on the show keep their relationships less dramatic and, for the most part, out of the spotlight.

Here are the real-life partners of the cast of Grey's Anatomy.

Ellen Pompeo & Chris Ivery

Ellen Pompeo and Chris Ivery attends the 2018 Vanity Fair Oscar Party Hosted By Radhika Jones - Arrivals at Wallis Annenberg Center for the Performing Arts on March 4, 2018 in Beverly Hills, CA
Presley Ann/Patrick McMullan via Getty

When Ellen Pompeo hangs up Meredith Grey's scrubs, she goes home to her husband of 16 years, Chris Ivery.

The two met in 2003, got married in 2007 and later welcomed three children — Stella Luna, born in 2009, Sienna May, born in 2014, and Eli Christopher, born in 2016.

Though Pompeo has called her supportive hubby "my rock ... my soulmate," the record producer wasn't always keen on her steamy love scenes on Grey's.

"I remember in the beginning it was really hard for him," she said on the Ladies First with Laura Brown podcast in 2021. "He was like, 'This is not what I signed up for. You go to work and make out with that. I like Patrick [Dempsey] and everything, he's a good dude, but like really?' "

Needless to say, Ivery adjusted and stood by his girl for her 19-season tenure on the show.

Patrick Dempsey & Jillian Dempsey

Patrick Dempsey (R) and makeup artist Jillian Dempsey attend the Porsche Design Celebrates Festival of Watches on September 14, 2014 in Beverly Hills, California
Charley Gallay/Getty

Patrick Dempsey's run-in with wife, Jillian was written in the stars — or, at least, in an appointment book.

At the time of their meeting in 1994, Jillian, who owned a hair salon, had an employee who had a knack for jotting down celebrity names in the appointment book as a joke. So, when she saw her future hubby's name on the list of clients, she thought it was another ruse.

However, when the actor walked in, Jillian was pleasantly surprised. "I was shocked," she recalled. "But at the same time, I was happy because he was so cute."

At the time, both parties were in relationships and didn't get together until 1997. Jillian moved in three months after their first date and the couple wed in 1999.

Beautiful as their love story has been, the Dempseys have been honest about the tougher times in their marriage, including their near-split in 2015.

"Our marriage was not something I was prepared to let go of," Patrick told PEOPLE in 2016. "I didn't feel like we had done all the work. And we both wanted to do that work. That's where it started."

The lovebirds share three children: daughter Talula Fyfe, whom they welcomed in 2002, and twin sons Sullivan Patrick and Darby Galen, whom they welcomed in 2007.

Justin Chambers & Keisha Chambers

Justin Chambers (right) and Keisha Chambers during The 37th Annual NAACP Image Awards - Arrivals at Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles, California, United States
Jason Merritt/FilmMagic

Alex Karev may have been conflicted between his past love, Izzie Stevens, and more recent love Jo Wilson, but in real life, Justin Chambers' heart has belonged to one woman — his wife, Keisha — for upwards of 30 years.

The two met when Justin was working as a model in the early '90s and his wife was a booking agent. They got married in 1993 and share five kids: daughters Isabella, Maya and Kaila (who are twins) and Eva, and son Jackson.

On his long-term relationship with his soulmate, Justin told Good Housekeeping in 2007, "We've been together for so long that I really don't know any other way to be. I can remember lying in bed with her years ago and having conversations about our grandparents — and now our grandparents are gone," he revealed.

"We've gone through that together, and now our parents are getting older and we're going through that together. Every relationship has its ups and downs, but I'm glad I get to go through the ups and downs with her. I just feel really fortunate to have found someone who will be my partner on this journey."

Katherine Heigl & Josh Kelley

Josh Kelley and Katherine Heigl
Josh Kelley and Katherine Heigl. Mike Coppola/WireImage

Katherine Heigl and Josh Kelley's meet-cute is the ultimate Hollywood love story: The two met when the actress starred in the musician's "Only You" video. The rest was history.

The stars began dating in 2005 and got married in a private ceremony in Utah in 2007.

To celebrate their 10th anniversary in 2007, Heigl posted a candid caption about their relationship, writing in part, "I gotta be honest. There have been moments where I didn't think we'd make it. Where I wanted to take my pillow and smother him in the middle of the night," she wrote.

"But I'll tell you what. The more time I spend with this guy the more deeply I begin to understand that he is the best of me. When the whole world falls into disarray and nothing makes sense to me he is my shelter, my safe harbor. When self-doubt and self-loathing creep into my soul he is my champion, my number-one fan."

The two have three children: Naleigh, whom they welcomed by adoption in 2009 from South Korea, Adalaide Hope whom they welcomed by adoption domestically in 2012 and Joshua, whom they welcomed in 2017.

Jesse Williams & Ciarra Pardo

Jessie Williams
Fernando Ramales/Backgrid

Sorry everyone, but it appears your favorite Grey Sloan Memorial plastic surgeon, Jesse Williams' Jackson Avery, is off the market.

The 41-year-old actor and activist was spotted strolling the streets of New York City hand-in-hand with Ciarra Pardo in June 2022.

According to her Instagram bio, Pardo is the co-founder of N4XT Experiences — a premier and global event experience company — and is the current president of L.A. Fashion Week. It's also worth noting that she served as chief creative officer of Rihanna's Fenty Corp from 2014 to 2019.

Though it's not clear how long the two have been an item, several of Pardo's Instagram Story Highlights showcase the pair having fun on date nights and taking family vacations.

Kate Walsh & Andrew Nixon

Perth, AUSTRALIA - *EXCLUSIVE* - Kate Walsh was all smiles as she held hands with her fiance Andrew Nixon at the Crown towers hotel in Perth. The couple were dressed to the nines to attend the annual telethon gala which raises money for charity in Perth. They were happy to chat and pose for a quick few photos before heading to telethon. Kate Walsh was wearing her engagement ring on her finger. Pictured: Kate Walsh BACKGRID USA 22 OCTOBER 2022 BYLINE MUST READ: Backgrid AU / BACKGRID USA: +1 310 798 9111 / usasales@backgrid.com UK: +44 208 344 2007 / uksales@backgrid.com *UK Clients - Pictures Containing Children Please Pixelate Face Prior To Publication*
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The second time is the charm for this recurring Grey's favorite, who played Addison Montgomery.

Kate Walsh and Andrew Nixon met in an unbelievable way: on a ship just before the COVID-19 pandemic. "We met, as one does, on a NatGeo expedition to Antarctica," she shared while visiting The Kelly Clarkson Show. Of the trip, she joked, "[Saw the] penguins, check. Ice, check. Whales, check. Man, check."

Like many of her cast mates, Walsh has kept her relationship off the grid, but she did accidentally reveal she and Nixon were engaged during an Instagram Live with her longtime friend and Private Practice costar Amy Brenneman in October 2022.

"Here comes the jungle cat, that is my fiancé," Walsh said as Nixon stepped into the camera frame.

Brenneman then told Nixon, "She just 100 percent outed your engagement."

"I did," Walsh admitted.

"I just outed our engagement," she added, to which Nixon simply responded, "Aww."

Walsh was previously married to studio executive Alex Young. The two divorced in 2010.

Kim Raver & Manu Boyer

PASADENA, CALIFORNIA - FEBRUARY 10: Manu Boyer (L) and Kim Raver attend Lifetime's Female Directors and Leading Actresses 2019 Winter Television Critics Association Press Tour at The Langham Huntington on February 10, 2019 in Pasadena, California. (Photo by Jesse Grant/Getty Images for A+E Networks )
Jesse Grant/Getty

Kim Raver's character, Dr. Teddy Altman, has mastered the complexities of cardiothoracic surgery, and in real life, Raver has mastered the art of keeping her private life under the radar.

The actress has been married to her French director hubby Manuel Boyer since 2000, and she chooses to keep the intimate details of their relationship to herself.

Asked about their first meeting, Raver told Women's Health, "I met him in New York, in a swimming pool. That first meeting is kind of sacred, so I think I want to keep it to myself."

The couple have two sons, Luke West, 21, and Leo Kipling, 15.

James Pickens Jr. & Gina Taylor

James Pickens Jr. (R) and wife Gina Taylor Pickens attend a Pre-Emmy Food Tasting Mixer hosted by "Grey's Anatomy" Star James Pickens Jr. and wife Gina with Kim Crooms on September 18, 2013 in Los Angeles, California.
Maury Phillips/WireImage

Much like Chambers, James Pickens Jr. has had a relationship that for the entire time he's been playing Dr. Richard Webber on Grey's.

Though not much information is known about his wife, Gina Taylor is a credited actress, having worked in films such as Deliver Us From Eva, and is featured on soundtracks for The Lion King 1 1/2 as well as Sing Along Songs: Brother Bear, per IMDb.

According to Hollywood Life, the two were married in 1984 and share two children — Gavyn Picken and Carl Tharps.

T.R. Knight & Patrick Leahy

T.R. Knight and husband Patrick Leahy attend the after party for "Romeo And Juliet" Off Broadway opening night production at Pangea on October 16, 2013 in New York City.
Bruce Glikas/FilmMagic

T.R. Knight and has been locked down with his long-term beau, Patrick Leahy, for more than a decade.

The two met in 2010 and got married 2013 in a private wedding ceremony attended by former costars and friends Katherine Heigl and Kate Walsh.

For the 10th anniversary of their meeting in 2020, the actor, who played the beloved George O'Malley on the hit show, posted an adorable couples' selfie taken by his husband while they were out on a stroll.

"Ten years ago, @bridgeteverett @zshaffer1 and @jasoneagan made meeting this magnificent human possible. My goal for the next ten? Keep trying to deserve him," Knight wrote under the sweet pic.

He shared the same sentiment under pictures commemorating their ninth wedding anniversary last October, writing, "Nine years ago today Patrick and I married. This is one of my favorites from that day- it sits on my desk. I still strive to deserve him, and carry the hope that one day I may succeed."

Kevin McKidd & Arielle Goldrath McKidd

Kevin McKidd's Wife Arielle Files for Divorce
Randy Shropshire/Getty

Kevin McKidd (Owen Hunt) was married to ex-wife Arielle Goldrath McKidd for five years before announcing their separation in July 2022.

"I don't often share my personal life on social media, but today there is something I do want to share with you," he wrote in a now-deleted Instagram post. "A few months ago, Arielle and I decided to end the marriage portion of our relationship. We reached this conclusion after much soul searching and discussion. We know it's what is right for both of us."

In December 2022, Arielle officially filed for divorce in Los Angeles, citing irreconcilable differences as the cause of their split. She requested joint physical and legal custody of their two children: Aiden, 5, and Nava, 3.

Kelly McCreary & Pete Chatmon

Pete Chatmon and Kelly McCreary attend the private reception celebrating the opening of "Kwame Brathwaite: Celebrity and The Everyday" at Philip Martin Gallery on November 03, 2018 in Los Angeles, California.
Colin Gray/Getty

Though married life has been quite the roller coaster for Kelly McCreary's character, Dr. Maggie Pierce, in real life, that hasn't been true.

In fact, the show served as the perfect conduit for the actress and her director hubby, Pete Chatmon, as the two met on set.

McCreary and Chatmon got married in an intimate seaside wedding ceremony in 2019 and shared images of their big day with fans on Instagram.

The Chatmons welcomed their first baby, a girl named Indigo Wren, on Oct. 3, 2021.

Chyler Leigh & Nathan West

Chyler Leigh and Nathan West arrive at the 2017 GLSEN Respect Awards at the Beverly Wilshire Four Seasons Hotel on October 20, 2017 in Beverly Hills, California
Gregg DeGuire/WireImage

Chyler Leigh (a.k.a. Lexie Grey) has been married to her husband, Nathan West, since 2002.

In addition to sharing three kids — son Noah Wilde, 19, and daughters Taelyn Leigh, 16 and Aniston Kae, 14, — the two also share a passion for music.

In fact, Leigh made her singing debut in 2017, collaborating with her hubby on a song titled "Nowhere."

"There's a lot of times right now with our careers where there's a lot missed opportunities to be together," West told PEOPLE of the song's inspiration.

"We find ourselves going a couple of weeks sometimes without really having a chance just to connect. When I was writing 'Nowhere,' that's what I was thinking about. While I was thinking of her she was thinking of me. It's special because love knows no boundaries."

Giacomo Gianniotti & Nichole Gustafson

Nichole Gustafson and Giacomo Gianniotti attend Ending Youth Homelessness: A Benefit for My Friend's Place at Hollywood Palladium on April 06, 2019 in Los Angeles, California.
Vivien Killilea/Getty

For their 2019 wedding, Giacomo Gianniotti (Andrew DeLuca) and his bride, Nichole Gustafson, went back to the actor's place of birth: Rome.

The couple said "I do" at Villa Pocci, which sits on a lake and overlooks Castel Gandolfo, a year after the Grey's hunk proposed.

And while Gianniotti and Gustafson were keen to start a family, the process has been pretty tough for the couple, who had two miscarriages that resulted in "medical abortions."

"Even though my suffering can't be compared to my wife's suffering, I still suffered," Gianniotti shared on the Man Enough Podcast hosted by Justin Baldoni, Liz Plank and Jamey Heath. "I still lost two children. Never gonna get to meet them. Never gonna get to know their names. Never gonna get to push them on a swing. I lost that. That's heavy."

He continued: "For my wife and I, the trauma was threefold because the first trauma is finding out you've lost your child, which is hugely traumatic," he explained.

"The second trauma is having to go to a medical facility where that child is having to be removed from her body and the finality of that is incredibly traumatizing. The third trauma is having to share this news with your community, loved ones [and] family and friends, and having to relive that trauma through sharing it."

Jessica Capshaw & Christopher Gavigan

Christopher Gavigan and actress Jessica Capshaw attend the 2015 Baby2Baby Gala
Stefanie Keenan/Getty

Also very low-key about her private life, actress Jessica Capshaw (Arizona Robbins) married entrepreneur and co-founder of The Honest Company, Christopher Gavigan, in 2004.

The two have four children: son Luke Hudson, whom they welcomed in 2007, and daughters Eve Augusta, whom they welcomed in 2010, Poppy James, who was born in 2012, and Josephine Kate, who joined the family in 2016.

Caterina Scorsone & Rob Giles

Caterina Scorsone, Rob Giles
Rob Giles (L) and Caterina Scorsone. AFF-USA/Shutterstock

Caterina Scorsone (Amelia Shepherd) split from her husband of 10 years, Rob Giles, in 2020.

"Caterina and Rob have separated. They remain friends and are committed to co-parenting their children in a spirit of love," their reps told PEOPLE at the time.

The actress wed Giles, a musician, in 2009. They share three daughters: Eliza, 10, Paloma "Pippa" Michaela, 6, and Arwen, 3.

Camilla Luddington & Matthew Alan

Matthew Alan and Camilla Luddington
Matthew Alan and Camilla Luddington. Neilson Barnard/Getty

Camilla Luddington — who plays Dr. Jo Wilson on the ABC drama — and longtime boyfriend Matthew Alan — of Snowfall, Castle Rock and 13 Reasons Why fame — tied the knot in an intimate California coastline ceremony in 2019.

The dreamy wedding was attended by 70 of their closest friends and family, including Jessica Capshaw.

"We're just ready to do the damn thing," she told PEOPLE at the time. "We kind of already feel married because we have a 2-year-old. But there's something romantic to us about solidifying that family unit by having the ceremony and actually having Hayden present. To be honest, I'm just excited to get into that new normal of married life."

They welcomed their daughter in 2017 and were engaged in 2018.

Christopher Carmack & Erin Slaver

ERIN SLAVER, CHRIS CARMACK
Stewart Cook via Getty

Chris Carmack — who plays orthopedic surgeon, Atticus "Link" Lincoln on the medical drama —married his longtime girlfriend Erin Slaver in 2018.

"Chris and I are overjoyed to now be husband and wife!" Slaver told PEOPLE of their special day. "The wedding, although a blur, couldn't have been a more perfect beginning to the adventure that lies ahead for our family."

The two welcomed their first daughter, Kai, in 2016. She was later joined by sister Cielle Estee in 2022.

Sarah Drew & Peter Lanfer

Actress Sarah Drew (L) and her Husband Peter Lanfer (R) attend the 2018 Creative Arts Emmy Awards - Day 1 at Microsoft Theater on September 8, 2018 in Los Angeles, California.
Paul Archuleta/FilmMagic

Long before we knew her as the eccentric April Kepner on Grey's Anatomy, Sarah Drew was Mrs. Peter Lanfer, and the way her husband courted her was straight out of a Nicholas Sparks novel.

In 2018, she told Us Weekly that Lanfer pursued her in an old-fashioned way.

"We worked at a camp together as camp counselors, and then he wooed me with hand-written letters for eight months before we saw each other again," she told the publication.

They wed in 2002 and share two children — Micah Emmanuel, 11, and Hannah Mali Rose, 8.

Jason Winston George & Vandana Khanna

Actor Jason George (L) and Vandana Khanna attend The Trevor Project's 2016 TrevorLIVE LA at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on December 4, 2016 in Beverly Hills, California.
Tommaso Boddi/Getty

Jason Winston George may have made many hearts flutter during his tenure as Ben Warren on Grey's Anatomy (and Station 19), but in real life, he is very much in love with his wife of 24 years, Vandana Khanna.

So what's been the secret to their long-lasting marriage?

He told Steve Harvey, "We fight fair. You're gonna have fights because if you don't have fights, you're not being honest. So when you fight, you've gotta be fair about it."

Asked to explain further, George elaborated, saying, "When you settle it, don't say it's settled if it's not, and then bring it up again six months later. When you settle it, it's settled. Right?"

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