The Lovers as Feelings in Love & Relationships (Upright & Reversed)

The Lovers is the card of love, relationships, passion, desire, and choices. Ruled by Gemini (the Twins), the Lovers speaks to the duality of unity: yin and yang, masculine and feminine, heaven and earth. The Lovers show that perfect union is possible. You can find your soulmate. 

The Lovers feature Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, with the archangel Raphael looking upon them from above. There is the serpent’s temptation on one side, and burning desire on the other. Raphael unites the couple, as he is the angel of communication. Although the world the Lovers inhabit is not perfect, they are each other’s other half.

Upright Lovers as Feelings

If you are asking about how someone feels about you, and you draw the Lovers, that means this person feels that you are their soulmate. They feel deeply in love with you on every level, because you complete them. They desire you sexually, and they want you emotionally. Their feelings for you go beyond lust or need—their passion for you feels almost spiritual. They feel connected with you at soul level. They feel love, respect, and compassion for you out of every ounce of their being. They feel that they have consciously chosen you, and they feel proud of that decision.  

The Lovers as feelings means that they feel that they can be open and honest with you. Gemini, Mercury, and Raphael all rule over communications. Both Adam and Eve are naked in front of each other. Similarly, they feel that they can share their raw emotions with you. Their heart is open with you, and they feel comfortable enough to be truly vulnerable. From this sacred space is where trust and confidence emerge. This creates a powerful bond between you. 

For singles, the Lovers is a sign that someone has fallen head over heels for you and that you’ll be in a meaningful relationship soon. They feel great when they are with you, and they want to be with you. For those embarking on new relationships, the Lovers is also a great sign. Your partner feels passionately about you and their decision to be with you. They desire you on every level, and they feel happy and satisfied with you. They feel confident in the idea that you could very well be their soulmate. They feel that this is the perfect union for them. 

For existing relationships, the Lovers can represent an undying love. Your partner’s feelings for you are out of this world, and the feeling only grows stronger with time. They feel that there is an everlasting flame between the two of you. Their entire life is better with you, and you make them feel complete. This may also be a sign that your relationship is growing in a renewed period of passion, and that you are headed towards even deeper love and commitment.  

If you are asking about an old flame or an ex’s feelings about you, the Lovers means that they feel passionately about you. They still think about you often, and wonder if they let go of their soulmate. Your ex knows how strong your connection was, and they miss it. They may have had the realization that their life is incomplete without you in it. Your ex may reach out soon about getting back together, because reconciliation is on their mind. 

In the context of whether or not a relationship is headed for commitment, engagement, or marriage, the Lovers as feelings is a strong sign for the affirmative. Your partner feels that you are truly their soulmate. You complete them, and they want to be with you for the rest of their life. They feel whole with you, and at ease with being themselves. If you are wondering whether or not they will propose, all signs point to yes.

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Lovers Reversed as Feelings

When you see the Lovers reversed, it indicates that relationships are strained and lack harmony. They feel out of sync with you, and your communication is challenged. Are you getting into arguments again and again? Are harsh words being exchanged between you? They may feel that the two of you do not share the same values, and they are questioning all of their decisions in the relationship. 

The Lovers reversed can be a sign that a person’s feelings for you are not mutual. One of you may be more emotionally involved than the other. They may be obsessed with you although you view them only as a friend, or perhaps it is the other way around. This creates a chasm between the two of you. This large imbalance and disunity can only lead to insecurity and disappointment down the road. 

The Lovers reversed can also mean that the person in question is afraid of getting hurt. They have tasted the forbidden fruit and now have the knowledge of good and evil. They are aware of their own nakedness. Due to previous bad experiences, they may feel extremely fearful of what might happen if they were to put themselves out there and be vulnerable in love once again. Their heart is hardened, and it may not be possible to convince them otherwise. 

For singles, the Lovers reversed as feelings indicates that this is not the right person for you. The feelings may not be mutual, and that’s not enough to get a relationship started. For those in new relationships, the Lovers reversed as feelings is a sign of discord. Are both of you coming into the relationship with the same expectations, and have you communicated that with each other? Understand that there are things that you can and can’t change about each other, and let the chips fall where they will. 

For those in committed relationships, the Lovers reversed as feelings means that you need to prioritize communication. Your relationship is not where either of you want it to be, and if you want to save it, you need to start being honest with each other. Align on your values. If the past is a source of heartache for either of you, it needs to be addressed but also gain closure. If you find that the chasm between you two is insurmountable, closing the chapter and going your separate ways may be the best option. 

If you are asking about an ex’s feelings about you, the Lovers reversed means that your feelings towards each other are not mutual. Your ex may feel nothing for you, even as you want them back desperately—or perhaps it is the other way around. What disharmony there was during your relationship still remains, along with the barriers to communication. Reconciliation or getting back together is unlikely to be initiated by your ex.

In terms of whether or not a relationship is headed for commitment, engagement, or marriage, the reversed Lovers as feelings indicates that they feel out of sync with you and that needs to be addressed first. You can’t put the cart before the horse. They feel that your relationship is strained and there is a lot of baggage to work through.  If you have been feeling misaligned lately, talk to your partner and get on the same page. It is also possible that the feelings between you are not mutual, in which case they do not want to move forward with a deeper commitment. However, they may not be straightforward with you, and lead you on. No matter what a person says to you, always judge them by their actions first. 

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Conclusion

For relationships and feelings, The Lovers is a paramount card. The Lovers speaks of a soulmate relationship with a perfect union under heaven and earth. True love is real, and it is extraordinary. It is not just for the storybooks. This card also teaches us that this love is only possible through excellent communication and a shared understanding. Raphael hangs heavily over Adam and Eve, as their guardian angel of communication. Finally, the Lovers reminds us that just as you want to be loved by another, make sure that you love yourself too. 

If you find yourself needing further clarity in your relationship matters that go beyond reading for yourself, Sibyl offers unlimited tarot readings on love & relationships, as a neutral and objective third party.