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Hello!
My girlfriend and I have been dating for a little over three years. My girlfriend has had various health issues for the last year or so. Mainly chronic headaches, constant fatigue, and other intermittent things. Basically, after researching it myself I believe a lot of these issues could stem from her being a mouth breather. She breathes through her mouth pretty much 100% of the time. Her health in general is a touchy subject, and I believe her mouth breathing has also contributed to a weak jawline which she has communicated insecurity over in the past. How can I bring up this potential solution without hurting her feelings? Should I?
TL;DR: I think my girlfriend’s mouth breathing is causing health problems and I’m scared to bring it up
EDIT: she has been gone to multiple doctors and gotten various tests and been prescribed medicines and other things but nothing has seemed to help
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i’m going to assume you’re being honest here and just a bit dense rather than an obvious troll.
in the western world, “mouth breather” is an insult that basically implies she’s ignorant and backwards.
so you might want to research an alternate way of presenting your dr. google diagnosis, like say ‘underdeveloped nasal passages’ or something…
Yeah I’m not trolling. And that’s why I’m hesitant, because it has an insulting stigma but I do think it is leading to some health issues
If you have concerns about your partner’s health, you might advise her to speak with a medical professional. If she’s already doing that, drop it and leave it alone.
If she’s been a mouth breather all her life, it won’t have suddenly started causing symptoms in the past year. If about a year ago she suddenly switched from nose to mouth breathing, I’d be inclined to think that’s a symptom, not a cause. Either way, I’m extremely dubious your medical advice is either wanted or accurate.
She has spoken with doctors without much luck. (Just edited my post to include this info)
Then leave it unless and until she asks you what you think is up. It’s touchy, she’s already seeing doctors, and I don’t think this will help anyone.
I don't think her jawline is impacted by mouth breathing, and it's certainly not relevant to a health convo, so please don't bring that up. I'd tell her you have concerns about her health, and if after 3 years she can't talk about her health with her partner well where does she see this relationship going?
Chronic mouth breathing at an early age undoubtedly affects facial development, but I agree not relevant to her health and wise not to bring it up.
Lol don't. You didn't find some secret on reddit that her doctors missed
I breathe through my mouth and have my whole life- in order to fix it multiple doctors told me it would require pretty extensive facial surgery that would be painful and have a serious recovery time and that they didn’t think it was a serious contributor to any health issues. Don’t go by google and suggest something her doctors haven’t already talked to her about.
Exactly - OP, it is likely the formation of her jaw and face that cause her to breathe this way, not the other way around. Her breathing is not mis-shaping her jaw.
You aren't her doc, and you have said she has seen doctors. It has to be on her to search further, based on how much it is affecting her quality of life. If you stop here, you can stay out of jerk territory.
Or is it too big of an inconvenience for you to have to be around someone often feeling unwell? I do hope this isn't because your pee-pee is sad about her headaches and fatigue...
If your girlfriend is seeing medical professionals, leave her health care to them. If she’s not, encourage her to do so. Leave your own speculation based on web searches out of it unless she invites you to share.
She has spoken with doctors without much luck. (Just edited my post to include this info)
To make an omelet, you've got to break some eggs.
Yeah, it may make her self-conscious and jangle her feelings, but seeing the appropriate health professional (probably respiratory is where I'd start) could help her address the underlying problems.
A little emotional discomfort up front is a small price for fixing the "real" problem.
And after three years, you should be able to have this conversation, and have the relationship survive.