The Best Jean-Ralphio Episodes of 'Parks and Rec'
- 118 VOTES
- Photo:
- NBC
When Entertainment 720 goes bankrupt, Tom and Jean-Ralphio decide to hold a huge “end of the world” party in their office since the lease is not up until the next day. Jean-Ralphio invites Tom's ex, Lucy, to the party in an attempt to hook-up with her.
Memorable Quotes:
Jean-Ralphio: The entire party's a VIP area.
Tom: There's also a double-VIP area.
Jean-Ralphio: A triple VIP area.
Tom: And a centurion club elite VIP area.
Jean-Ralphio: Sponsered by Sobe Life Water.
Tom: No one's allowed in there, not even us. - Photo:
- 259 VOTES
- Photo:
When Entertainment 720 plans the event for Li'l Sebastian's memorial, Jean-Ralphio encourages Tom to come work with him on the company, but Tom is reluctant to leave his city hall job. The show proves to be a great success – thanks in part to unexpected pyrotechnics – and Tom decides to leave his government job to work at Entertainment 720.
Memorable Quotes:
Jean-Ralphio: I hope you brought a change of clothes, because your eyes are about to piss tears.
Jean-Ralphio: I made my money the old fashioned way. I got run over by a Lexus.
- 334 VOTES
The Set Up
- Photo:
- NBC
Tom introduces Ron - and the rest of the Parks Department - to Jean-Ralphio for the first time as he puts him forward as a candidate to be Ron's assistant. Jean-Ralphio does not get the job, but April does. This episode was Ben Schwarz's first appearance on Parks and Recreation.
Memorable Quotes:
Jean-Ralphio: Mr. Swanson, two things: One, it is an absolute honor to meet you. Two, who is that hot intern chick out there? Because, honestly, DAAMMN!
Tom: [referring to Jean-Ralphio] So what do you think about your new assistant?
Ron: I want to punch you in the face so bad right now.
Tom: Okay. Message received; I'll keep looking.
Ron: Thank you. Bring me the opposite of him. - Photo:
- 446 VOTES
Woman of the Year
- Photo:
- NBC
Tom reveals that part-ownership in a nightclub is a long-time dream of his, so he seeks assistance from Jean-Ralphio, who contributes $5,000. Donna considers joining Tom in the business venture, but she quickly reconsiders after meeting Jean-Ralphio. Elsewhere, the fast-talking budding-entrepreneur finds time to hit on April.
Memorable Quotes:
Jean-Ralphio: What up, Big Teeeeeee...stop. This must be the lovely Donna. Enchanté. Listen beautiful, let's cut the bull, alright? You want this. I definitely want this. T.H. wants this. Let's seal this devil's threeway right here, right now. Step one: We buy into this club. Step two: We roll over to the club, either in your Mercedes-Benz or my pre-owned Acura Legend. Step three: I dagger you on the dancefloor. Just bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, now all the ladies sayin', bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce. What do you say, sexy?
Donna: I'm out.
Tom: Why?!
Donna: I hate that guy.Jean-Ralphio: You wanna come home with me?
April Ludgate: Don't you work at Lady Footlocker? - Photo:
- 533 VOTES
London
- Photo:
- NBC
Dr. Saperstein, Jean-Ralphio's father, tells Tom he is destroying Rent-A-Swag to get back at him for ruining his children's lives. Tom asks Jean-Ralphio and Mona-Lisa to confess their lies to their father – that Rent-A-Swag was Jean-Ralphio's idea and Tom stole it – but Dr. Saperstein is not interested in closing Tommy's Closet. Tom ends up selling Rent-A-Swag to Dr. Saperstien and moves on to his next business venture, Tom's Bistro.
Memorable Quotes:
Jean-Ralphio: When life gives you lemons, you sell some of your grandma's jewelry and you go clubbin'.
Tom Haverford: [Speaking to Dr. Saperstein about Jean-Ralphio and Mona-Lisa] Your son, he's my best friend, he's like a brother to me, but he's a disaster. And your daughter, she needs to be put in a mental institution. On an island. In space.
- Photo:
- 636 VOTES
One Last Ride
- Photo:
- NBC
Everyone is gathered at the Parks and Recreation office to say goodbye to one another. Throughout the episode, there are flash forwards to show the future of each character. Jean-Ralphio's future finds him faking his own death to get insurance money, but he gets caught when he sneaks into his own funeral.
Memorable Quotes:
John Ralphio & Mona-Lisa: [Singing] Don't be suspicious.
Leslie: [Saying goodbye] Jean-Ralphio, although I truly hope that I never see you again, I do wish you a long and happy life.
- Photo:
- 714 VOTES
Ben's Parents
- Photo:
- NBC
Tom and Jean-Ralphio work on a pitch for Tom's next big business venture: Rent-A-Swag. After Jean-Ralphio leaves the project, Tom shares that it is now a solo venture and Ron agrees to fund Tom. Learning of Jean-Ralphio's departure was all Ron needed to get involved.
Memorable Quotes:
Jean-Ralphio: [approaches Ron] Swansong! What up, my man? [Ron pokes him with his kebab] OW! Are you kidding me?!?
Ron: [To Tom] I like doing business with serious people. And when you removed yourself from the company of that moron [Jean-Ralphio], you showed me you're a serious person.
- Photo:
- 814 VOTES
Ron and Tammys
- Photo:
- NBC
Ben discovers that, at Entertainment 720, Tom and Jean-Ralphio Saperstein are wasting large amounts of money on a state-of-the-art office, giving employees high salaries with full benefits, and paying Detlef Schrempf and Roy Hibbert to play basketball all day, despite having no income. Tom and Jean-Ralphio ignore Ben's warnings.
Memorable Quotes:
Jean-Ralphio: [Talking to Ben about his common name] Oh you could do better than that. I'm gonna help you out right now, your name is Angelo. Angelo thank you so much for coming out. Get a thicker tie, it looks weird on you. It makes your head look like a fish. Secondly, I don't know where the paperwork is, but when you find it can you take care of it for us? We don't have any pens 'cause we're afraid it's gonna leak on our shirts. Well actually I hate the name Angelo I'm gonna switch it up for you right now. Your new nickname is... Jell-o shot. What do you think about that J-shot? Any questions?
- Photo:
- 913 VOTES
- Photo:
- NBC
Leslie Knope is serving a two-week suspension from her job, but insists on sneaking back into her office to grab work to do at home, which Chris Traeger disallows. Meanwhile Jean-Ralphio gives Ben career advice.
Memorable Quotes:
Jean-Ralphio: Why don’t you use that time to go after one of your passions? Like model trains, or toy Gandalfs or something.
Ben: I don’t know why you jumped straight to model trains. I mean, it’s accurate…Barney: Welcome, Mr. Saperstein.
Jean-Ralphio: Thanks so much!
Barney: I will just show you to your cubicle.
Jean-Ralphio: I can't wait. I bet it's a big one, huh Barney?
Barney: The temp agency said that you are fluent in QuickBooks Pro, correct?
Jean-Ralphio: Oh right yeah, we should cover that. Y'see, my resume might not actually be accurate, right? So I have no idea what you're talking about. Don't know what QuickBooks are.
Barney: You don't have any accounting experience?
Jean-Ralphio: No, no, no, Barney, c'mon. But you don't have to be an accountant to know that this girl is a 10. [to the woman] Yo, what up, Diaz? Come here often?
Woman: To my job?
Jean-Ralphio: Oh, sharp mouth on her also. Shut it.
Woman: Is this the new temp who's supposed to help me with the spreadsheets?
Jean-Ralphio: You wanna talk about spreading the sheets, we can go back to my place and I will rock your-
Barney: You're fired!
Jean-Ralphio: That makes sense. So I just go out the same way I came in? - Photo:
- 109 VOTES
Two Funerals
- Photo:
- NBC
Tom and Leslie begin filming an action movie in the banner store complete with stunt doubles and Jean-Ralphio as the villain. In the film, Jean-Ralphio leads a gang of jewel thieves in an attempted heist.
Memorable Quotes:
Leslie: Why are you like this?
Jean-Ralphio: Pills, baby!Jean-Ralphio: [As villain character] Not so fast Haverfraud.
- Photo:
- 1111 VOTES
Moving Up
- Photo:
- NBC
Tom recruits Jean-Ralphio and Mona-Lisa to help him hand out VIP invitations to A-listers at the Unity Concert. Later, the pair's father Dr. Saperstein stops by Tom's Bistro to gloat, but is surprised find the venture's opening night to be a big success.
Memorable Quotes:
Jean-Ralphio: I like your energy hombre. What do you say you and I ride go-karts later.
Craig: I want to go horseback riding.
Jean-Ralphio: Deal. - Photo:
