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I’ve never understood dudes who aren’t psyched when they have a partner making bank. I guess I’m just not traditional enough to dislike the idea of being a kept man.
I feel like the only time I can maybe understand it is if you are barely scraping by and she’s making stupid bank.
But if you’re making millions and she’s making more millions, I can’t even see how anyone could care.
I always find it interesting. He admits that it made him feel inferior to his wife, less than. That says to me that if the man is making more money he feels that his wife is inferior, less than, which apparently is perfectly fine.
I try so hard to wrap my brain around it.
I think you're misreading. Just because he "feels" inferior as a result of cultural pressures etc doesn't mean he flips that onto a spouse when the shoes on the other foot. This is a guy saying he had to come to terms with feelings of inadequacy inside himself (which he admits were just that, feelings) as he fought what he'd been taught were traditional norms in the culture he was raised up in. His message is about acknowledging that weakness, overcoming it (despite failing to save the marriage long term), and growing from it, and hoping others learn to do the same (earlier and without losing a marriage). This is a positive story here.
Well said.
Yeah and those norms were/are that men=superior, women=inferior.
You're correct. Those are the norms and traditional notions he was dealing with.
Imagine all you have to be is a stay at home husband with a nanny. Wake up at 8 make the kids breakfast, drive em to school, play a round of golf, have a few beers, get home, make dinner. A legit dream
I feel like a stay at home moms life doesn't always go that easy so I don't think it will be that simple if a man does it. Usually the person earning expects you to clean and plan events etc. Birthday parties work dinners family events are stuff the person who stays at home will have to manage if and when they come up. Not to mention the errands...
It’s a bit of a ding to my ego that my wife earns more than double what I do but the swimming pool and tennis court helps cushion the blow.
I feel like it had a lot to do with professional jealousy because they’re in the exact same industry. I think even lesbian couples go through that.
My girlfriend is making more than me. Which is great for her, but it's making me realize I'm probably being underpaid
That’s probably true cuz we’re all being underpaid.
Same. However, I think it might be a primitive fear of the woman disliking him as a partner because she makes more. Not the other way around.
Not all women handle it well… I’ve personally seen disasters with a breadwinner wife. Very controlling, basically treating that guy like an employee. I’m not saying men handle it well always but it’s a consideration.
Lol the men used to be controlling all the time when they were the breadwinners.
yeah, the point is that this behaviour is not gender exclusive.
No but I doubt this behavior is equally distributed amongst genders either. It’s far more likely to show up more in men than women.
David Arquette is opening up about his relationship with ex-wife Courteney Cox and the difficulties they faced amid her fame on Friends.
During a recent appearance on SiriusXM’s Andy Cohen Live, when the host asked if he ever felt “inferior to” or “less than” the Friends alum due to the massive success of the NBC show, the Never Been Kissed actor responded, “Yeah, absolutely.”
“It’s difficult, I mean in terms of like, I have some of the traditional male things where I want to like, provide and pick up the check and, you know, be the breadwinner,” he explained. “In the acting world, in general, you’re always going on this roller coaster of popularity and not able to get a job. So it’s like this weird thing. And then, when you’re comparing yourself to someone who’s at the top of the television iconic world, it’s kind of hard to put yourself there.”
After the two met when they worked as co-stars together in 1996’s Scream, they got married a few years later in 1999, during the height of Friends‘ success. They also share a daughter, Coco, who they welcomed in 2004. It wasn’t until 2012 that they filed for divorce, and a year later when their split was finalized.
Arquette added that earlier in their relationship, they had to do a lot of “learning” to be able to get through the “pain, and like arguments, or, you know, ego.”
Specifically, the Mrs. Davis actor said getting through the difficult periods as a couple “has to do with the way you’re taking things, the way you’re saying things, the way you’re responding to things, the way you’re, you know, allowing other, sort of, outside influences affect how you feel about yourself.”
For him, personally, Arquette added that working on his confidence and just himself, in general, helped a lot. He said, “working out some of the pain and trauma that I had so that I could open up and own sort of what makes me happy, what my needs are, where my boundaries are.”
Although he feels he and the Cougar Town actress “had a really great thing at the end,” looking back at how they handled everything, he said now, “I just encourage people to truly try to work it out.”
Arquette is currently married to Christina McLarty, with whom he shares two children. Cox is dating singer Johnny McDaid.
What a fragile boy
I never got this. Your wife is “more successful” in your eyes. Who cares, be happy for her and enjoy your life. Go to therapy for your bruised ego.
The culture was much more misogynist just ten years ago, more so back in the 90s.
A common insult to husbands on tv shows was “I guess I know who wears the pants in your family” and if the wife had a strong opinion about anything some background character would make a whip cracking sound and snicker at the husband.
That made its way into real life as well
I think it was a reflection of real life
Especially going into a relationship where she was already a huge TV star.
I agree with you. Also, according to IMDb, he’s in 140 titles as Actor and CC is in 70. He’s had a much more broad career it seems. Also, as a Seinfeld fan, I have never really watched Friends, so I can’t comment on quality of work. She got a huge paycheck for it, so it doesn’t even come down to career success, it just comes down to money.
Arquette Estimated Net Worth: $30M
Cox Estimated Net Worth: $150M
Hollywood is made up of bruised egos. A lot of people here have talent dysmorphia.
Wow you’ve never watched friends?’
I have, I just don’t think it’s funny and I was trying not to disparage it.
I’m a Seinfeld kinda guy.
I’ll refer to this meme.
Original. Hopefully you’re not a comedy writer.
Did not watch “friends”, but no way it can be worse than seinfled
I think it’s also because they’re in the same line of work. It would be hard not to compare yourself.
That’s what I was thinking. It’s probably very difficult to be in an industry where it feels like you get rejection after rejection and your significant other is not facing the same problem. Of course you want to celebrate them, but it must be emotionally draining.
I forgot he was in that one lol
If this is a story, then Colin Jost and Scarlett Johansson must be an even bigger story.
She couldn't hold a candle to you on hawking collect call services though. You're the real MVP.
He was also WCW champion.
I don’t understand why making less than your wife is intimidating? I know it’s a learned thing in society, but it’s just dumb
It's almost as if his character from Scream V was somehow inspired by real life events.
met him at the airport in nashville, lovely guy
I'm a guy, and I never understood why other dudes feel so overpowered when their spouse brings more money than them. Hell, I'd settle for a sugar mama instead of cranking my ass 9-5 just to be called a "man." Nah, bro.
Keep slaying, ladies. And any man that feels threatened by your success isn't really a man, he's just a frightened boy.
And if any sugar mama is out there, I'm also a great cook.
My wife makes more than I do. I fuckin love it. As long as we’re together, who cares who makes what? To us it’s the household income that matters.
What a pansy. His feeling inferior is because as a man he is. I would be proud of my spouse for killing it in her career.
I appreciate his honesty and willingness to talk about it openly. Feelings like this are natural and sounds like they tried to work through it. The next generation learns better.
This makes him sound petty and uncofident