So shockingly inept that it's hard to believe its real.

Full Review | Original Score: 0/4 | May 23, 2024

Alfred Hitchcock said “To make a great film you need three things- the script, the script, and the script”. Madame Web is the perfect example of what happens when those three things are missing.

Full Review | Original Score: D | May 22, 2024

The reality is that Madame Web is not a good movie. But in the right frame of mind, with the right crowd, and the right mix of controlled substances, it *can* be a fun movie.

Full Review | Original Score: 2/5 | May 20, 2024

A tough sell from the start. But one of the worst superhero films ever made? Gimme a break.

Full Review | Original Score: 2/4 | May 5, 2024

Dakota Johnson stars in this latest Marvel superhero origin story, which at one point even includes the birth of future Spider-man Peter Parker. Johnson plays Cassandra Webb (cringe), who can see the future because a spider bit her mom and … Ho-hum.

Full Review | Original Score: 2/4 | May 4, 2024

Madame Web can’t shake the sense of a male gaze, egged on by its all-male writers.

Full Review | Original Score: D | May 2, 2024

Madame Web us so lifeless and unoriginal it almost feels like a spoof. It's laughably bad.

Full Review | Original Score: 0/5 | May 1, 2024

... is absolutely not what the marketing sold, while strangely being exactly what the marketing implied — a fairly standard superhero origin story that feels ripped from the era in which the story primarily takes place: the 2000s.

Full Review | Original Score: 2.5/5 | Apr 30, 2024

Madame Web is merely another addition to the continually growing list of mediocre comic book films that show a clear lack of effort being put into their stories & characters, leaving viewers with yet another entry that elicits little more than a shrug.

Full Review | Original Score: 2.5/5 | Apr 29, 2024

Why do I feel like I know more about the male villain, Ezekiel Sims (Tahar Rahim), than I do about literally anyone else in this film, including the main character?

Full Review | Apr 28, 2024

The thing that's definitely true of Madame Web is that it was absolutely butchered, just hacked apart by a screaming maniac with a cleaver, in post-production.

Full Review | Original Score: 2/5 | Apr 14, 2024

Madame Web feels like a Frankenstein made of spare Spider-Parts dissected and rebuilt by the studio machine.

Full Review | Original Score: 1.5/5 | Apr 8, 2024

One of the worst films in recent memory,

Full Review | Original Score: 3/10 | Apr 4, 2024

A boring, lethargic film that throws out random ideas waiting for something to stick and traps a bunch of recycled superhero clichés in its web. [Full review in Spanish]

Full Review | Original Score: 2/10 | Mar 26, 2024

"Madame Web is a frustrating example of a film that could work if they took better care of the story and didn't try and judo it straight into franchise fuel."

Full Review | Original Score: 2/5 | Mar 21, 2024

The screenplay is a series of exponentially escalating incomprehensible storytelling decisions resulting in a bona-fide NONSENSE FUGUE.

Full Review | Mar 18, 2024

There’s something almost cosmically funny about the fact that every ill-conceived boardroom mandate and desperate spider-milking mistake backfires in the most spectacular way imaginable.

Full Review | Original Score: C- | Mar 18, 2024

But where the dialogue needed wit and spark, it has the kind of will-this-do one-liners ("Hope the spiders were worth it, Mom!") and tired backstories you get when the characters are too flat to flesh out with rounded personalities.

Full Review | Original Score: 2/5 | Mar 15, 2024

Nothing works at all.

Full Review | Original Score: F - - - | Mar 15, 2024

Madame Web lumbers from setpiece to setpiece, with a perpetually irritated Johnson acting as she'd rather be anywhere but here.

Full Review | Mar 11, 2024