The longer I walk with God, the smaller I recognize myself to be—small power, small thinking, small faith, small resistance to sin. I am not great. Surprisingly, this has not discouraged me. The more I see my smallness, the more my comprehension of and wonder at God’s magnificence grows. I am fully aware that God has always known my smallness, and it has never stood in the way of His redemptive love for me. I see His delight as I learn to see myself with greater accuracy, and I treasure His lavish gifts more fully. To my relief, my engagement with the story of His world recorded in the Bible reveals that I’m not alone in my smallness. On every page of the Bible, I find small people struggling to live in a fallen world.
Desperation Reveals Smallness
I recently meditated on the story of a leader whose smallness led Him to a life-changing encounter with Jesus. In John 4, an official sought out Jesus because he felt his smallness. He had a son he loved dearly—we know this because he made a two-day journey to find help for him. He feared his son’s death was imminent and knew his impotence; he could do nothing to stave off the threat of loss. As I read, I felt his agony, his desperation. I “saw” the man.
Jesus Responds to Hearts
Jesus saw the man too. As the God-man, He saw more deeply than I can. He saw the man’s heart, his unbelief. “So Jesus said to him, ‘Unless you see signs and wonders you will not believe’” (John 4:48). Jesus’ words brought to mind another time He was challenged by people seeking signs (Matt. 16:4). I couldn’t help but note the contrast. Here in John, Jesus encounters a seeker—a man of small faith but one who longs to believe. In Matthew, He was being put to the test by Pharisees and Sadducees who jealously wanted to quell His growing notoriety. There, His words have a biting tone (“An evil and adulterous generation seeks for a sign”), but here, He draws the man’s attention to his smallness. “You need signs to believe.”
In light of the whole context, it’s impossible to read condemnation in these words. Not only did Jesus heal the son, He told the father his son would be healed so that he would make his two-day journey home with hope. And just in case that doubting man needed more evidence that a miracle had taken place, Jesus brought healing to the boy’s body at the precise moment they were speaking. In Matthew, Jesus is exposing rebellion; in John, He is exposing smallness.
It Is Good to Have Eyes to See Our Smallness
This unnamed father came to Jesus in humble anguish. Offering nothing, he made his request, and Jesus met his humble plea with grace upon grace. At the words, “Go, your son will live” (v. 50), the man went on his way, believing. When his servants met him along the road with news of the son’s recovery, and they discerned the moment of the miracle, his whole household was moved to believe. The man’s smallness had opened the way to this encounter with Jesus and life-changing faith. For the Pharisees and Sadducees in the Matthew account, there was no humble seeking, only arrogant defiance. Here there was no faith to grow, and no faith grew. The narrative in Matthew ends with “So he left them and departed” (Matt. 16:4).
Encourage the Fainthearted
It’s profoundly countercultural to admit weakness. We live in a world that presses us to “find our greatness,” but in the silence of our solitude, we secretly fear the realities of our limitations. We encounter people living in this tension every day. Jesus’ interactions with a fearful dad offer us beautiful counsel to share with those in need.
- Jesus sees your heart and is not disappointed with your weakness.
- Jesus is ready to meet you where you are.
- Smallness is what opens the way for a deepening relationship with Jesus.
- Encountering Jesus will grow your faith, and growing faith will grow His wisdom, strength, and holy conviction in you.
- When your encounters with Jesus change you, you will be equipped to be an agent of change in others.
Weakness Reveals God’s Glory
Paul learned this truth on his life journey as well. God worked intentionally through a “thorn” that weakened Paul unbearably. In his process of growth, he repeatedly asked God to take away the suffering and resulting weakness. God responded with a clear answer of “no.” He knew that pride in self would be a temptation for Paul (to keep me from being too elated/proud—2 Cor. 12:7), so He sought to keep him from that danger. “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Cor. 12:9). Like Paul, we can encourage those we walk alongside to “boast all the more gladly of weaknesses so that the power of Christ may rest upon them” (v. 9). This is good news!
Questions for Reflection
- Are there ways in which you are yielding to the cultural pressure to “find your greatness?” Do you recognize this as an obstacle to growing, dependent intimacy with God?
- Can you identify a time in your life when your smallness opened the way for a deeper relationship with Jesus? What helped that to happen? How can you nurture this in your life?
