6 • Timelash
Badly written, badly directed and badly designed just about sums up Timelash. Season 22's copious location filming meant something had to give, and clearly it was this. Karfel is patrolled by beekeepers, plagued by glove puppets, and powered by some tinsel strung across a doorway. Peri—finally allowed to wear proper clothes—might get the worst treatment of any companion in the classic series, bundled between captors for the entire duration. Elements of it almost, sort of, work. The Borad looks superb, and Herbert brings a fresh outlook which is welcome. My favourite part is the notion that Pertwee went around handing out publicity shots of Katy Manning: AND that he taunts Peri with albums of her predecessors! But though it's atrocious in most respects, and despite the awful dynamic between Doctor and companion reaching its breaking point, Timelash is a hoot if you're in the right frame of mind. (D)
5 • Attack of the Cybermen
Eric Saward and Ian Levine have been fighting over the writing credit for this one for years. To be honest, why anyone would want to admit responsibility for such lines as "A little disagreement with our tin friends" is beyond me, but I'd say this is a story that works depsite the best efforts of those distinguished gentlemen. Although it's not very good, Attack of the Cybermen is my favourite Cyberman serial since the 60s. (Cynics will correctly point out there's only two others.) Director Matthew Robinson (brother of Tom) is the one to thank, creating strong compositions; he also switched the Cryons' gender so Peri avoids being the only female character. Lytton, looking almost illegally handsome, is better value second time around, and I like his groovy little theme tune. Less convincing is the Doctor's soul-searching at the end (misjudged sure, but Lytton was still a murderous assassin), and frustratingly, although there's a lot here I like, the serial just lacks quality. It's an issue that will permeate this season. (C)
4 • The Two Doctors
Fun fact: this came out the same year as Meat Is Murder. If this is the best of the classic multi-Doctor serials, and I think it is, it's also the most pointless. It's a tasty prospect, but I have to say I find the format of three 45-minute episodes unappetising, and as a result the story feels very, very long. And that's just for starters. Dastari—a sort of decaffeinated Jeff Goldblum—and the elegant Chessene don't make for effective villains, but mercifully the menacing Shockeye gives us something to get our teeth into. Holmes brings some much-needed style to this season's set of scripts (I don't imagine Eric Saward dared touch these with a barge pole), albeit with a side order of unnecessary—and very tall—Sontarans. Food is a theme of course, but more than that, hunger, lust and desire all feature: good that it's Jamie and not Peri that Shockeye has his eye on. Troughton sadly struggles in a one-note performance, and although the beautiful Colin Baker and Carmen Gómez dazzle in the sunshine (Holmes resented the late change of location to Seville; in hindsight, the location filming is easily this serial's best aspect) it's very poorly directed. There's no attempt to to tell the story other than what's on the page, and weirdly, despite the visceral material, it all feels a bit bland. Needed more salt. (C+)
3 • The Mark of the Rani
It's been far too long since a period historical—they used to be Who's forte, but recently it's not been so good. But despite some wandering—and often incomprehensible—Geordie accents, this is a solid outing. The Rani would be a fantastic addition, but any possibility of her posing a threat is curtailed when she's outwitted within seconds by the Master of all people. I think this would have been more successful as a comedy—the Doctor and the Rani ganging up on Anthony Ainley perhaps, who, maybe in the presence of the formidable Kate O'Mara, is so robotic that you wonder why the Luddites don't go for him. Peri sending the Doctor effectively zooming to his end is a hoot, and the Rani turning people into trees has to be seen to be believed. Baker ("before I forget my abhorrence of violence"—a far cry from him dunking some guards in an acid tank in the last story) at last appears at least slightly Doctorly, and the direction is outstanding, giving a real sense of geography that this era of Who rarely achieves. (B)
2 • Vengeance on Varos
At last! As much as I see this season's longer episodes are a downgrade, part 1 stands head and shoulders above the rest of 1985 Who—and a great deal of the rest too. Nabil Shaban's Sil is the best new villain in what feels like a lifetime: the costume is disgusting and allows Shaban's extraordinary performance to come through. The cliffhanger is also magnificent. Colin Baker is outstanding, and director Ron Jones (uh-oh) delivers it well. Weirdly, his static "shoot what's there" approach actually works in this story with its theme of TV. (I still think Sheila Reid's scenes should have been shot face-on, Gogglebox-style.) If there's a glitch it's some of the characters. We're left to assume Arak and Etta are husband and wife (or equivalent), and Rondel goes unmourned. Then there's the Doctor. His disposal of the guards isn't entirely unfunny, but in hindsight it's wrong. A difficult Doctor is bad enough, but a murderous one is something else entirely, and really shouldn't have made it to the screen. (B+)
1 • Revelation of the Daleks
I've never had much fondness for Saward's work on Who—he lacked the cutting edge needed in a script editor, and his own stuff too frequently felt to me like someone playing with toy soldiers. And to be clear, he isn't quite skilled enough to pull off something this audacious. But it remains the best thing he did for the show. At times he's almost Holmesesque, allowing a wicked comic streak to penetrate the story. I think there's too many characters here (either that or they're all around for too long), but there are also some magnetic performances. Clive Swift is wonderful as Jobel, and Tasambeker's awkward, insatiable earnest is completely right for the character. There's creepiness too: most people would cite Stengos (I just think he looks a bit silly) but it's Davros's violently spinning head that does it for me. The Daleks are at their best, mowing people down left right and centre, and the direction is thoughtful: it's this that makes the story never less than gripping. It could take everything a bit further. But when we start talking about what a story doesn't do, rather than what it does, we're talking about a top-drawer serial. (B+)