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It seems that the practice of historical document referring to the Royal House of Empress Matilda’s descendants through her son Henry II as the “Plantagenets” originated in 1460 at the earliest, which is close to the end of their dynasty with Richard III’s death at Bosworth Field in 1485.
Henry VII and his children were referred to by contemporaries as the “House of Tudor,” and every change of dynasty since then has been well-documented accordingly by contemporaries (the Stuarts, the Hanovers, etc).
So how did the Plantagenet kings refer to themselves and their House?
Did they just call themselves the “Royal House” ?
Or did they refer to themselves as “Angevins” after Henry II?
Did the Yorkists and Lancastrians refer to their family lines thusly? Or did they defer to an older family name or landed title?
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Yes, it looks like the first official use of the Plantagenet name was by Richard, Duke of York, upon his claiming of the throne in 1460. He spelled it "Plantaginet" though. The term probably existed before then, otherwise there wouldn't have been much of a reason for York to use it. I imagine he used it then to establish the fact that he was of the same line as Henry VI, as they both descended from Edward III. York's personal name was just Richard of York though.
If you're talking about their actual royal title, it was usually just their first name and their holdings. I.e. Edward III was "Edward, by the grace of God, King of England, Lord of Ireland and of Aquitaine," Henry V was "Henry, by the grace of God, King of France and England and Lord of Ireland," etc. You don't actually start to see them claiming allegiance to a family name until the Wars of the Roses, when they did so in opposition to each other. But even then it was best to just call yourself "the king," to reaffirm the idea that you're of the same lineage and therefore have the same right to rule.
Honestly, the whole idea of the Wars of the Roses as a two-sided war between opposing houses is a later Elizabethan invention. The actual conflict itself was more of a scramble for power between several rival families.
To add, to this, the full list of Plantagenet titles, based on what they print on their great royal seals:
Henry II & Richard I - "N, by the grace of God, King of England, Duke of Normandy and of Aquitaine, Count of Anjou"
John - "John, by the grace of God, King of England, Lord of Ireland, Duke of Normandy and of Aquitaine, Count of Anjou"
Henry III - Edward III - "N, by the grace of God, King of England, Lord of Ireland, Duke of Aquitaine"
Edward III - Richard III: "N, by the grace of God, King of England and France, Lord of Ireland"
They start out with England, Normandy, Aquitaine and Anjou, until John who adds Ireland and eventually loses Normandy & Anjou, and so we continue until Edward III who replaces Aquitaine with the whole of France. From that point on, it's England, France and Ireland.
Referring to a dynasty wasn't exactly a thing back then. At least it wasn't a legally rigid matter let's say. People would often be named after places, either where they were born or their titles, and occasionally nicknames that got stuck.
For instance, there was a guy called William de Warenne who was a companion of the Conqueror. He was made the Earl of Surrey, so his descendants who didn't hold the earldom were called X de Warenne (as that was the one that got stuck), and the earl was called either Lord Warenne, Lord Surrey or Earl Surrey. Furthermore, the guy's line was actually extinct patrilineally, and the man who married the heiress took the name Warenne for convenience. But it wasn't legally a sort of matrilineal marriage or something as Crusader Kings portrays, if you're familiar with it.
Finally, the name or title of a parent could also be used (William FitzOsbern, Henry FitzEmpress, Henry FitzRoy etc.) but it was more popular in the early phases of the conquest.
As early as the 13th century, and regularly by 14th, the birthplace became pretty much standard: Edward of Windsor (III), Edward of Woodstock (the Black Prince), Lionel of Antwerp, John of Gaunt (Ghent), Edmund of Langley, Thomas of Woodstock, Edward of Angouleme, Richard of Bordeaux, Henry of Bolingbroke, Edward of Norwich, Richard of Conisburgh... These are all "Plantegenets", and none was referred to as such.
As a little fun fact, the king's sons also weren't referred to as princes until much later. In fact, prince (coming from the Latin princeps civitatis, meaning the first of the citizens, in time shortened to just princeps) just meant ruler, and in time it came to be used specifically for places that weren't a kingdom but, well, sort of a kingdom, a smaller one, places where the rulers couldn't be merely called dukes, but they couldn't also be called kings. Wales became such a place at some point, and when the Prince of Wales became the traditional title for the heir apparent, the heirs became princes. So, even that wasn't a thing. For instance, Edward Longshanks was just referred to as "the Lord Edward" before becoming king. Edward II was the king guy who was a prince before taking the throne with the exception of John whose situation was a bit complicated. Every child being called princes and princesses would come much later with the Hanoverians. So even this is a relatively modern thing.
In short, mostly, they referred to themselves as, well, nothing.