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For various reasons, a lot of us are struggling. How can we get through it?
Long ago I came across the “Serenity Prayer”. Whilst I’m not religious, the words are very helpful.
For years, they were on a card in my purse.

God grant me the serenity
To ACCEPT the things I cannot change
COURAGE to change the things I can
And WISDOM to know the difference.

Accepting my son was brain damaged and nothing I could ever say or do was going to change it was probably the hardest thing I have ever done. Many tears were shed in the process. In the end I decided that I might not be able to change his brain damage, he was going to have as good a life as I could make it.
Accepting that my health wasn’t good enough to care for him any more was equally hard. After 14 courses of antibiotics in 12 months, there was no option but for residential care, first as a boarder at school, then a residential college, then a lovely residential home.
Wherever he was living, he came home regularly, and never missed out on any family events. I did my best. Even when college was 60 miles away, so 240 miles for a weekend at home, I did my best.
He is kind, polite, helpful, he might not be able to read and write but somehow he understands how to drive our 10 ton steam roller, he has a photographic memory, and now lives alone with carer support in a lovely flat that he keeps spotlessly clean.
To everyone struggling at the moment, you can only do your best.

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Thank you, BowlingBun. This popped into my inbox at just the right time.

It sounds like you have done an amazing job bringing up your son.

J x

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Thank you.

Long ago, our local carers group published a poem in their magazine.

It begins “Life is queer with it’s twists and turns"…”
Also helpful when you are banging your head against a brick wall!

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Thanks for this timely reminder @bowlingbun My Dad had a beautiful calligraphy handwritten copy of this prayer framed on his desk in his Doctor’s office (he was a consultant geriatrician - the irony oh the irony!)
So in school holidays I saw the frame a LOT.

You must be so proud of your son and how he’s getting on - we all know where his resilience and bravery come from!
A good post for the forum

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