OPINION - Victoria's Secret reviving its fashion show? Forget Donald Trump, this could be the worst comeback of 2024

If you thought we’d evolved past being entertained by grown women wearing giant wings to flog cheap knickers, I’m sorry to report that we’ve not yet reached that level of human maturity. The beleaguered all-American underwear giant Victoria’s Secret — which is looking at its third consecutive year of declining sales — has decided that the way to ricochet those numbers back to more shareholder-friendly heights is to revive its fashion show.

In a post to its 76 million followers (can they all be wrong?), the brand announced that the show would “reflect who we are today, plus everything you know and love — the glamour, runway, wings, musical entertainment and more!” Is it possible to feel more underwhelmed?

In its heyday, the VS show was viewed as a sort of “fashion” Olympics, women’s magazines ran misty-eyed features on how much these honey-toned and honed models exercised and starved themselves; columnists took it upon themselves to ape their “journey” into cystitis-threatening G-strings. It was a bounteous traffic driver which required weeks of digital content plans leaving no angle (or indeed angel) uncovered. Ten reasons why we hate the Victoria Secret’s show! Plus, how to get the look of a VS model! There were “fantasy” bras worn by the queen bee of the season, which came encrusted in real diamonds and often valued at more than $1 million. In 2014 the show — then very much in its hype era — came to London, which I can’t tell you much about as I refused to go, and not just because it was in Earl’s Court.

Then, of course, came #MeToo and some awkward revelations about its (now-ex) CEO Les Wexner and his proximity to Jeffrey Epstein. The Goliath purveyor of Pink with a capital P satin pyjamas was partially slain and has been in a sales decline and slump ever since. Predictably, its brand position attempted to pivot into what some might call “woke”, producing worthy-sounding podcasts featuring an “inclusive” line-up of guests which presumably no one listened to; no more angels in wings, chubby models in campaigns, etc.

Lauren Sherman, a correspondent for Puck whose weekly newsletter has become a fashion industry must-read, has fortuitously co-authored a book — Selling Sexy: Victoria’s Secret and the Unravelling of an American Icon — coming out this October (the show is slated for November). I asked for her views on the comeback and she offered that “it comes down to this: I don’t think the people running the company know what to do, and so they are falling back on what worked, falling back on nostalgia. The problem: consumers aren’t driven by nostalgia when they’re buying a bra. They want something sexy and comfortable — and cool. There is nothing cool about trying to recreate the past.”

Ellen Atlanta

Attempting to trade in on the passé comes for VS at an inflection point when the toxicity of the overexposed beauty complex is being scrutinised. In her book Pixel Flesh, Ellen Atlanta details the heightened pressure on attaining a “perfect” body. “Despite body positivity movements online, eating disorders statistics are worse now than they were in the Nineties. Running concurrently is an explosion in the demand for cosmetic enhancements.”

The supermodel — and former VS model — Cameron Russell has a similarly frank view of her experiences in her memoir. “We know what we are selling,” she writes. “Doesn’t that make it okay? Perhaps the real problem is the exchanges outside of a contract. All the flirting, the casual nudity, the dinners, the texting, all before anyone gets paid. I doubt many of the girls want to touch these men or show them their tits, at least not for free. But it’s the only way in.”

At the same time, weight loss injections are being touted as the new Botox, such is our commitment to reach an elusive neverland of body perfection, where I guess, finally, we can pull on a Victoria’s Secrets thong and feel like we too can attain catwalk nirvana and a giant pair of angel wings. Please, make it stop.

Hurrah for Roksanda

Many designers are on the brink following the fallout from the Matches debacle; it is all anyone is whispering about at fashion dinners in town. Fingers crossed there are enough saviours waiting in the wings. Roksanda Ilinčić’s eponymous label was thankfully averted from administration last week when she sold to The Brand Group. Ilinčić will remain as creative director, and one hopes continue to enthral us (and fans from Zendaya to Vanessa Redgrave) with her beautiful designs. Which if you’re quick, you can also snap up from the second drop of her delicious collaboration with Jigsaw (on sale now).

Victoria Moss is Fashion Director of the Evening Standard and ES Magazine